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bazzy
Contributor

Gaslighting at workplace

I've been a victim of severe gaslighting even 2 years after it happened but it was happening over a course of 5.5 years where I was abused in subtle ways that the parties could get away with it. I felt like I was under a hypnotic spell when I was around certain people my reactions would differ from person to person and I was saying sorry a lot when I did nothing wrong it's just they were dumping their own emotional baggage onto me. I am still feeling the aftermath of what I have gone through and both the Department, management and staff members who inflicted the abuse got away with it. I was constantly loved bombed and in that Department there was a lot of trauma bonding as well. The worst part is that I didn't know about it and by the time I realised it was already too little too late my former boss got away with sleeping with some of the younger girls and I was being pressured to commit those same acts but I refused. 

 

The psychological manipulation and gaslighting damage has been done my perceptions and feelings were being twisted and turned and where I became a co-dependent of other people. I saw myself become polar opposite and now none of the activities I used to enjoy no longer feel the same at all. I tried going through all of the proper channels like HR, Australian Human Rights commission, Prime Minister, Top secretary, Governor General but to no avail they won't budge at all.

 

 

 

 

32 REPLIES 32

Re: Gaslighting at workplace

Also, I feel my life has already been predetermined I saw people in that Department had everything served to them and yet they still complained and they got away with it and I feel my life is going to become unpredictable and I don't know where to go.

Re: Gaslighting at workplace

Hi @bazzy  sorry this gas lighting is happening and could you give more specific detail without not being out of your private self.

if department s have not helped you, do you have any idea why not?

tagging in my friend @HenryX he is very smart and @Emelia8 is very kind we are not supposed to give advice, but are hear to lend an ear when life needs a helping hand. 

Re: Gaslighting at workplace

Basically, I had things taken away from my desk and then reappear, teased, called names, blamed for things I did nothing wrong. Made to feel like the guilty one, socially isolated by the various staff members and unexplained login issues and what not and my own fears were used against me and I have a fear of watching scary movies, just people would scare me to death just to see my reaction. I had delusional and paranoid thoughts where my sanity was being eroded away and self esteem too where people would drain my confidence and I had severe fight, flight, fawn or freeze responses in that environment. I became a co-dependent of other people.

 

@Clawde

Re: Gaslighting at workplace

This is terrible terrible @bazzy   Hope your ok, humans are not to be like this, look after you first please then we as a group will sort all this out, one point at each time have you got records of this crap, if not we will find a way of looking after you on the forums they and s have looked after me every step of my way, your in safe hands here, people really do care, and watch over us peer support and moderators keep us safe, and look over and help us in  times of our needs have never been let, down yet. They just might need a little time tonight with the election results. Unfolding but they will come and look after you my friend promise everyone  is busy tonight but results will be awesome we hope with thre best thing.        🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🌹🥖🧀🧀🥖👏

Re: Gaslighting at workplace

Hey @bazzy !

 

It's great to see @Clawde offering you such amazing support.

 

I'm sorry to hear how painful things have become - it certainly does not sound fair.

 

At this time, do you have supports in place for yourself? You may not be able to change the department etc in a short amount of time, so I feel that the most important thing is to look after yourself - this IS in your control.

 

Do you have a support network, counsellor, psychologist whom you can speak to? Although they cannot change what is happening to you in your workplace, they may be able to shed light on the scenario so that you don't find yourself always saying 'sorry' for things that you inherently did not do wrong!

 

As with @Clawde , I'm sitting with you, and hope you will find the support you need.

 

Kindest,

tyme

Re: Gaslighting at workplace

@Clawde

  

Well, I'd be lying if things were ok. My parents are deeply worried about me I am trying to avoid the news because my mental health reached to the point where I ended enjoying the horrible things that were happening. I knew that there is something wrong in this environment and being around those crazy people. I have my parents and my brother but there is only so much they can do. The damage has been done.

 

 

Re: Gaslighting at workplace

At this time, do you have supports in place for yourself? You may not be able to change the department etc in a short amount of time, so I feel that the most important thing is to look after yourself - this IS in your control.

@tyme 

I've left the Department but the damage has been done which is what they wanted. They wanted me to stay quiet and this was their main goal where they tortured me to the point where I defenceless and cannot fight about their policies and procedures. The only support group I have are my parents but no amount of hugging or support is going help me get my confidence back.

 

Do you have a support network, counsellor, psychologist whom you can speak to? Although they cannot change what is happening to you in your workplace, they may be able to shed light on the scenario so that you don't find yourself always saying 'sorry' for things that you inherently did not do wrong!

I went to a psychologist, EAP and they were useless and I did provide them in comcare claim but it was rejected by the insurance company saying they found no psychological injury. but I had episodes of self harm and psychotic episode where I screamed at the top of my voice and lashed out aggressively too just for the amusement of staff and management. The reason why I was saying sorry a lot was because of the militant style of work culture in most organisation and I have had a past history of past trauma before been involved in a car accident out there no one really cares anymore they've become emotionless robots and the Department I was working for had such a dehumanising work culture but they give a false of identity because the people on the phones were escapist just to feed your mind with dopamine.

 

Re: Gaslighting at workplace

@tyme how is this?

 

Well, I'd be lying if things were ok. My parents are deeply worried about me I am trying to avoid the news because my mental health reached to the point where I ended enjoying the horrible things that were happening. I knew that there is something wrong in this environment and being around those crazy people. I have my parents and my brother but there is only so much they can do. The damage has been done my former boss got away with sleeping with some of the younger girls and he has 2 kids and a wife. I am struggling with self care though, struggling with losing weight and some physical problems too as I have started to go bald grey because I was put under severe stress and trauma. I feel numb none of the music I used to listen I can connect with like I used to in the past. This was not physical trauma this was psychological where your perceptions and judgement is being thrown out of sync and the awful thing is that Department can get away with it.


This is the Department I was working for although it was corporate environment and call centre I had severe shocks at my desk. For me my thing started from a 5 years ago where they give you this honeymoon period and then take it away from you by love bombing you and question your own perceptions and judgement of the events just to try to confuse you even more.  I saw them break apart healthy families they feed you this fantasy and then they take it away from you just to see your reaction. It's such a cruel department. I am struggling with confidence 

Re: Gaslighting at workplace

Sounds all too difficult @bazzy .

 

I absolutely hear that it was a very unhealthy working environment, and has led to ongoing issues. Sounds so unfair.

 

Do you have a mental health care plan? Perhaps this will help with accessing a psychologist outside the EAP? 

 

Please know that SANE also have counsellors ready to hear you. You can connect with them on the drop-in line 10am-10pm Monday to Friday on 1800 187 263. Having an external person to debrief to sometimes really helps. 

 

You can also learn about SANE new guided service here https://www.sane.org/referral

If you live in one of the 5 PHN's, you'll be able to access this service.

 

I'm here with you, 

tyme

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