Lived Experience Forum

[Kelstarkaruah]

So a brief run down. My partner is an addict. He made the brave decision to go to rehab. He has been there 4 weeks.
Over the last 8 months it has been up and down with his addiction with me supporting him. Emergency room visits, 3 months clean, swearing he'd rather die than go to rehab. Now he's there I'm falling apart.
I can't stop the feeling that this is it, he's not going to want me anymore. He's not going to come home to me.
He's getting buff and fit and I'm not.
He'll be too attractive to want me.
I'm so proud of him and I know there was no future if he didn't go, but I miss him.
I am trying to stop messaging him, he was always the person I turned to.
I don't want to feel like this anymore

[Former-Member]

Hi @Kelstarkaruah,

Welcome to the forums, and congratulations on reaching out.

I am wondering if the Rehab facility that your partner is in, offers support to families?

Quite often there are support programs for family and carer's attached to Rehabitliataiton units.

Please feel free to look over the  'facts and guides' information sheets here on the SANE website also.

https://www.sane.org/mental-health-and-illness/facts-and-guides  

http://www.fds.org.au 

Best wishes, and kind regards,

Jumpin

[Kelstarkaruah]

Thank you. It doesn't seem that they do. I don't call the rehab anymore as I don't think they like talking to me.

[BeachsideMUM]

Hi I've been to rehab myself and have been in recovery for almost 2 years now. The sad thing is that when we truely recover from our addiction we do change as a person. However, over 93% of residents of an inpatient facility (e.g. Rehab) relapse and return to their old life style. There is a support group NAR-ANON for family members and partners of drug users. They are a 12 step program which offers support and offers strategies on how to help you loved one. Maybe give them ago? P.S I lost lots of weight in rehab because there's only certain amounts of healthy food and the kitchens locked up after meals and at night
P.P.S I put it on after

[Kelstarkaruah]

Thank you so much for your response.
You should be very proud of yourself.
Unfortunately all the pain I went through and the support I gave by standing by him were in vain. My relapse with my mental health has meant his family have verbally attacked me and convinced him to cut me from his life.
I hold on to a tiny bit of hope that when he's put he'll still want me but it's not much anymore.
I try to go to an alanon meeting when I can as there are no naranon ones around. But now I don't know if there's much point.
Thank you though and you are amazing.

[Appleblossom]

I have often been in a rescue and support role in relationships.  It meant that I didnt know what I wanted or even needed.

Separation is always a difficult time.  Be kind to yourself you deserve it.

i hope you get support here.

[Kelstarkaruah]

It hurts. I'm trying thank you.