My Place

[tyme]

Glad @Oaktree . I was worried you didn't have electricity, water and food and hence we hadn't heard from you!

Please pace yourself with your studies so you don't burn out 🙂

[Oaktree]

@tyme 

Feeling sad about hopeandlove.

I am glad that we could be there for her but it’s so sad. She has only been a member such a short time. I wish we could have supported her for more of her journey 

[tyme]

Absolutely @Oaktree . Yet it is powerful to see the Community rally around this member and sit beside them during their last days. 

Are you okay?

Also, this is not the first member that the community have sat with till the end. 

It can be a real celebration in that we make space for people to both connect with and grieve with.

Take care.

[Oaktree]

@Snuggles @Till23 @Eve7 @MJG017 

Hey guys,

I just wanted to check in with you all. I know that I was upset this morning and shed tears over the loss of Hopeandlove. Please know that you are not alone in your grief. We are all here together to support each other. Healandlove’s thread didn’t seem the right place for this post so I have brought you over to my thread. Please continue to reach out here if you need to. Lots of love to all of you. Please take care of yourselves today.

[Till23]

Thanks @Oaktree 

I hope you not feeling too distressed.

I was also wondering if we could all somehow connect after the news, so thank you for inviting us here.

 I was very shocked when I read the post, even though it was expected at some point. I am sad but ok.

 I am trying to focus on the positive aspects, such as that she had people to communicate with until the end. That we were able to give her something other than her medical situation to think about. Also that everyone in the group hopefully made a meaningful connection with each other.

 I am fairly new to forums and I personally learnt so much from HopeandLove’s thread.

 I am a bit worried about @MJG017  and @Eve7 as they haven’t posted anything. I am hoping it’s just because they are doing something else and not on the forums.

Thanks @tyme for your contribution and advice 

[Snuggles]

Hi @Oaktree 

Thank you for reaching out.  It's consistent with the kindness that Hopeandlove radiated to us all.

I plan to honour Hopeandlove's request that we remember her birthday on the 2 April by throwing a daffodil in a body of water, but as I have neither near me, I'll pick some lavender and sit and reflect.

Just feeling really sad, quiet and reflective at the moment.  

Thanks for checking in on us all.  

Hugs

Snuggles 💙

[Oaktree]

@Till23 

Welcome to the forums. 
What we experienced with Hopeandlove was hard but very special. I am glad that I was able to be there with her for her last couple of days. I am sure it hits home harder for some than others. @Eve7 @MJG017  will post when they are ready. Either they haven’t seen the news or they don’t know what to say. 
I am glad that you are ok. Please know that you are a friend to me and can tag me anytime. I am glad to have met you x

[Oaktree]

@Snuggles 

I am sure Hopeandlove would love that. I am going to get a rose to throw into the ocean to honour her on her birthday. I hope that you are ok. Please be kind to yourself today 

[MJG017]

@Oaktree 

Yes, thank you for providing this space.  The other thread didn't feel like the place for talking too much about ourselves to me.

Yes, the news was... i don't thick shock is the right word as in a surprise, but a shock to the emotions i guess at knowing that she was gone.  You always hope for a bit more time.

When I started talking to her here, she had mentioned she only had a few years left due to her diagnosis.  And to see just how quickly it can change is quite a shock.  I guess from my own personal perspective, being in a similar position, it's especially difficult to think about.  I've spent a lot of effort the past year or so trying to think on 'now' rather than what's ahead and this hit hard this morning after reading the news.

So thank you for the concern @Till23, i'm okay i guess.  I just needed some time to process everything before I could write anything.  A well timed call from a friend late this morning was very helpful and much appreciated.💙

I not sure how many times i've read that letter from Hopeandlove by now, but as much sadness as it brings, there is also much happiness in that how she said she felt with all our support.  I get the impression she didn't experience much of that in life, so to give her that at the end and read how much it meant to her is a powerful reminder to use all about why we do this.  I think every single person would benefit from reading it.  It's such a powerful reminder to treat people with compassion, empathy, kindness, and love whenever we can.  This will stay with me forever.

[Till23]

@Snuggles I will float out something that is flowering in my garden in April for HopeandLove.

I am glad she saw that I floated out the sunflower yesterday.

It is a tradition from my background to float things into ocean as I am a saltwater person.

It is also a tradition of remembrance for people with breast cancer. I have joined a breast cancer survivors group between my two cancers and have performed this moving ceremony a few times now.