My Place

[Till23]

@MJG017 I had seen you posting to HopeandLove earlier and I know at least we three in the group were in a similar position. So I was also thinking of you during the last couple of weeks and how it might be impacting on you. I read that you had done so much for people in your community in similar positions. So please take it easy and look after yourself.

Reading HopeandLove’s earlier posts in other threads I also don’t think she had much support especially of late. So am very glad we could all support her.

[Snuggles]

Hi @Till23 

That is such a beautiful and heartfelt tradition. The act of floating flowers into the ocean carries so much meaning, honoring loved ones, remembrance, and connection to nature.

I'm sorry you've had to deal with cancer as well, especially breast cancer. I've had a few encounters with cancer myself, mainly skin cancer, but fortunately, I've been able to have them removed.

Sending you strength and warmth.

Snuggles 💙

[Oaktree]

@tyme 

we moved the discussion about how we were all feeling after Hopeandlove passed over to here.

[Till23]

Thanks @Snuggles for your kind words.

I am fine now. I am a bit smaller having had bits of me cut out 🤣

I only take a daily tablet now so all good.

Sorry to hear you’ve also dealt with cancer.

[MJG017]

@Till23 

It's obviously an incredibly difficult situation for anyone to deal with and I guess we find our own ways to do that and get the most of the time left to us.  For me, it's been to try an find some positives from what always seemed like nothing but negatives.  Supporting others going through this terrible disease was the one positive I found and it got me through the toughest few months of my life early last year.

Distracting myself be starting to work on creating a support group for others that was different from other support groups I had experienced.  A group that focused on coming together as friends and listening and supporting each other.  When it turned out to be a success and others really appreciated having a group like this as well it kept me going when nothing else felt like it would.

I have been warned multiple times, especially from my GP about taking on too much and not not taking care of myself.  For me though, helping people through their own dark times has help me, and continues to help me through my own dark times.  I've yet to find anything else that has worked anywhere near as effectively.

Saying all this, then Hopeandlove said she had been moved to end of life care, I had doubts.  The words of my GP and others in my head.  Was this taking on too much?  I couldn't ignore it though and went through knowing it would be extremely difficult personally.  But it surprised me so much. Talking to Hopeandlove as she faced what I feared most and I saw the strength and peace she got from the support she had found this past month gave me some peace from my own situation, more than from what anyone else has ever said to me.  In such a short time knowing her, she taught me so much and gave me such a precious gift.  One which i will carry with me forever.  Especially as someone who also never had much support and was alone for most of my life.  She reminded me to not look back, and think of who I have now.

I hope you're doing okay, not just today, but with everything else as well.  

[Snuggles]

@Till23 

I'm glad you're okay now, it can be really scarey.  All we can do is get regular check-ups and hope for the best.

If loosing a part of you means you can live longer it's worth it.  I'm full of scares from where they have cut out the skin cancer.  Anyway I'm in my 60s now so I'm way past worry about my looks. 😉

Take care.

Snuggles 

[Till23]

@MJG017 you certainly have done very well in finding positives.

 I agree I feel I have gained the most by helping other people.

As I was coming to the end of my second radiotherapy I decided to give something back as I felt I was well looked after. I suggested ceiling tiles for all of the linear accelerators (8 + the planning (simulation) room) so other patients would have something to distract them and to focus on to lie still. The department agreed and they have been up for almost a year now and patients and staff apparently really like them.

 I joined a group where we support each other. I have done a bit of fundraising for cancer and mental health.

 I am often told by psychologist I take on too much and to do self-care. But to me helping others helps me.

For me, personally, I’m not concerned about end of my life.

I cared for my father for 6 months in my house before he passed away at my home from cancer.

 I don’t have much support and went through my treatments by myself, so I can understand how having someone to talk to would feel positive, so I was happy to do it and I also learnt so much.

All the best with your journey and look forward to seeing you around the forums.

[Till23]

Thanks @Snuggles I am also in my 60s so wasn’t concerned about what I looked like, not that I’ve ever been that concerned about looks. If that’s all people see, then it says quite a bit about them.

 I actually wasn’t that concerned about the cancer. Compared to my MH struggles for me, cancer was an inconvenience really. Except that the treatment really exacerbated my cPTSD and I became very unwell from MH perspective. Actually that’s how I found the SANE forums in 2023, but I didn’t engage very much. 

When I retired late in 2024 I again engaged with forums as MH had a dip

Hope you are not too anxious about recurrences @Snuggles. It was a genuine pleasure to meet you and the others in the group all very supportive people.

[tyme]

Hugs to everyone @Till23 @Oaktree @Snuggles @MJG017  💙

[Oaktree]

Thanks Tyme

💙🦋🐬🐳🔹🔷🩵

@Till23 @Snuggles @MJG017 @Eve7 @avant-garde