Lived Experience Forum

[Peri]

Dear @Former-Member ,

 you certainly have a lot to deal with at the moment, physically, emotionally and psychologically.  My thoughts are with you, wishing you strength and small moments of joy in amongst it all.

i think of you a lot and am sending warm thoughts and tender moments

peri

[eth]

Hi @Former-Member   I'm sorry but I've only just now seen your posts about how difficult life is for you at the moment (starting with the one on Jan 7th).  I am still sorting out my settings since returning from my holiday.  

Sitting with you and feeling for you.  Very much hope you kept the appointment with your psychologist, or reached out to one of the helplines and found it did help.  Is there any way you can have some respite from your husband, e.g. a short trip away by yourself?  It might be helpful to give you some space to see your own needs and how you can best meet them.

I really appreciate your presence on the forums and am glad to see you've a lot of supporters here.

Here for you if you want to connect with me.  I do understand how difficult anniversaries of trauma can be, I have them too.  Have one coming up on Australia day.  I think they are harder when all around us are celebrating something.

Take care xx

[Former-Member]

Thanks so much @Zoe7  @eth @Peri @Shaz51 @outlander @Scarecrowe and also @Maggie @CheerBear @Gazza75 @BlueBay 

Its hard these couple of days prior to my psych apt on Wednesday.  I dont know what will eventuate during that appointment, whether I will even still have a psych afterwards.  As I mentioned to Outlander on her thread yesterday .. I see my psych appointments as a luxury really, given the out of pocket costs involved.  But up until now, its been a cost I've been willing to pay as it has helped to keep my head above water.  Having someone I can talk to openly and without reservation.  Now though, whether she still intends to see me in future or not, there are going to be reservations.  She broke my trust in several respects.  Not only did she ignore my emails when I needed her.  She also contacted my GP and gave him information which I given to her in confidence.  So it will be hard to regain my complete trust in her again.  But by the same token, I do not see that I could start to see another psych.  Its been such a hard and long road with this one, that I dont think I could do it all over again with another.  So I have so many mixed emotions around this upcoming appointment.  And my head is spinning with all the ramifications of it.

Its hard, but I am trying to distract by doing other things.  Today I ventured out to the gym, which I am quite proud of myself for.  I was just too triggered last week to go anywhere.  But I needed to get to the chemist for hubbys scripts plus buy some household groceries we needed.  So I had to get out anyway.  I managed to get through all that, then came home and crashed for a while.  But at least I feel a little better for the exercise, if nothing else.  I think until after Wednesday, I may be keeping a bit of a low profile.  I just dont feel up to many posts, and dont trust myself to properly support others.  I also have to be careful about not saying the wrong thing here, something I often fall into the trap of when times are hard.  I think my brain takes a break when I'm so triggered and/or down, leaving me open to errors of judgement.  So if I am not on your thread, like I normally am ... please forgive me.  I will be back when I can.

Sherry 💕

[Scarecrowe]

@Former-Member 

I wish you luck on Wednesday and I hope it all goes well for you.

Even though you may not be here on the threads like you normally are, just remember we are always here for you whenever you need us no matter what.

You take care of yourself, and just think of me hugging you through the computer 

[Maggie]

I will be thinking of you on Wednesday @Former-Member. In the meantime, take care of yourself. 💜💜💜💜

[Snowie]

@Former-MemberI hope Wednesday goes ok for you. It is so hard to have our trust broken, even so more when it is so hard to give in the first place.

All my love 

[outlander]

@Former-Member 💙💙

[BlueBay]

@Former-Member I feel for you a lot 

you have so much on your plate to deal with 

I hope things go well for you on Wednesday. 
take your time to rest 

always thinking if you my friend even when you're not on here 

you mean a lot to me 

take care ❤️❤️

[Zoe7]

Hey @Former-Member I know you are going through so much and the upcoming appointment tomorrow is filling you with so many emotions and thoughts. The nerves and stress associated with that would be all consuming right now - and I understand why. It is so hard having to see someone that has broken your trust and you feel you can no longer rely on - especially when you have been in crisis and that contact is really needed. Tht kind of let down not only sets us backwards but also has us questioning our own self-worth ...if our supports are there to support us then who will be right! Well Hon you have us here ...walking along with you, holding your hand and holding space here especially for you ...because you are special to us and really matter. There is no doubt tomorrow is going to be hard for you but take all of us, our love and our care for you in with you and whatever the outcome know we are here with you and for you. Sending you all the love I have and some extra squishy hugs from me, Tobes and Cat. 

[eth]

s from me too @Former-Member   for all that is going on for you atm.  I really hope you are able to be open with your psych(ologist?) tomorrow about how you've been affected by not being able to see her.  I have read somewhere that if you've been affected by the fires you are able to get more than the 10 mental health care plan sessions with psychologist.  Just not sure how you apply for it sorry - perhaps ask your GP clinic or ring medicare 132 011, they should know about it.  I'll keep a look out for the information.  

Maybe make a list of what you want to mention to the psych today so you are able to cover things if your feelings get really stirred up during the appointment tomorrow (as often happens for me).

I am under a Team Health Care Plan where my psychologist, GP and psychiatrist keep each other informed about what's happening for me and I feel it's a positive that they act as a team.  Just my personal experience.  I wonder if something like that is in place for you and no-one has told you.

Take care today.   Good on you for getting to the gym - that's better than I can manage.  But I do have my water tai chi class today which I always love.  A bit of exercise really helps our mh.