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The Importance Of Challenging Depression

In my experience there is no one thing that is the "magic bullet" for overcoming depression. What tends to work for me is a whole bunch of different coping mechanisms and wellness strategies.

Most of it seems to be focused around "forcing" myself to do things that my depression is telling me not to do, such as a bit of exercise, reaching out and socialising with other people, reducing the number of hours I am over-sleeping by, and so forth.

For me, distraction of any sort can help to ease the "seriousness" of it all, because that concern and anxiety about being depressed feeds back into itself, and makes the depression all the more severe and longer in duration.

I know how hard it can be when the depression just sucks all of the energy and pleasure out of your life. But even just a tiny victory of being able to get out and do something that your depression said is impossible is a major step. It proves to yourself that you can do it. It proves that the depression is not total master over you. Bit by bit, you can reclaim your life from the depression, and empower yourself to reach for the joy that we all deserve in our lives.

I know what I've just written could be perceived as mostly airy-fairy mumbo jumbo, but since I started challenging what depression was making me do - hide away in my bed for months on end, reject opportunities to socialise, avoid friends and family, wallow in my pain - my depressive episodes have been less severe and of shorter duration than at any time in my life. This is the breaking of a lifelong pattern of 30 years standing, and that is no small thing.

The challenge for each of us is finding practical and real ways that we can challenge our depression in our own lives.

General Coping Mechanisms and Wellness Strategies

For better or worse, I am managing my bipolar condition without the use of psych meds. I say this not as a recommendation, but just to let you know that's how I have chosen to proceed. I am fortunate enough that my symptoms are currently not so severe that I can't function at all...

Living with bipolar comes down to 2 things for me:

  • Coping mechanisms - important for managing day to day symptoms
  • Wellness strategies - important for reducing the severity of symptoms.


Most important are the coping mechanisms. These are the front line soldiers, the techniques and strategies I use just to be able to survive the wild ride that is bipolar. When my world turns upside down, I use my coping mechanisms.

The wellness strategies, in their own way, are every bit as important. They are the guiding principles that I live my life by. They give me the best possible chance of reducing the severity of my bipolar symptoms, so that I don't have to keep living on the edge clutching on to my coping mechanisms for dear life.

So, I guess I'll dive right into it and explain firstly some of my wellness strategies...

Wellness Strategies

Manage sleep. A very important part of controlling the severity of my bipolar is to make sure that I have a reasonably regular sleep pattern. The brain and body tends to treat lack of sleep as if it is an attack on the body, and the defence mechanisms kick off to compensate. At least, that's what I have found. When I don't get enough sleep, it triggers hypomanic highs in my bipolar cycle. Too little sleep, and the highs can get very difficult to manage. So, I make sure that I get at least 5 hours of sleep per night whenever possible.

Regular sleep patterns also ensure that your natural Circadian rhythm (your body clock) is in order, which helps to regulate the natural biological processes such as hormone levels and biochemistry in your brain (melatonin, serotonin, dopamine, etc).

Manage stress. This is just as important as managing my sleep patterns. I used to work in a sometimes very stressful job as an electrical engineer. I thrived on the stress. It sent my bipolar sky-rocketing up into hypomanic highs for long periods of time. If there's one thing that is guaranteed to eventually lead to a major depression, it's riding too high for too long. The body and brain just cannot sustain it, and there is always a price to be paid.

But work stress isn't the only stress that needs to be managed. If you are naturally an over-thinker, or a very emotional person, major stresses are applied to your mind and body just because you are "wired that way". Finding ways to minimise stress is important. If this is not possible, finding ways to unwind, relax, or otherwise vent the pressures that build up is a critical part of dealing with life.

Manage your hypomania. As I wrote above, managing your hypomania is a key part of managing the overall symptoms of bipolar. The problem most people with bipolar have is that the highs feel so damn good. You are full of energy and enthusiasm, your creativity is firing on all cylinders, you are fun and happy, and you just want to keep going and going beyond normal boundaries and borders. But bipolar is not magic. It cannot manufacture something from nothing. Eventually, the price for all of that energy and power has to be paid, and payment is generally made using the coin of depression. Depression is a terrible state, but it is after all only a natural part of the up and down cycle of bipolar. I have found much success in reducing the severity and regularity of my depressions by making sure I don't fly too high during my hypomanias.

Learn about your condition. Get to know what is happening with your thoughts and your emotions and your energy levels. Study carefully and at great length what is happening inside your head. Observe what is happening. Listen to what's happening with your thoughts. What are they saying? What is happening with your moods? It's great to read all of the books and scientific journals about bipolar (and highly recommended as a start) but what is truly important is to train yourself to be aware of what is happening to your mind and body.

The more you know about yourself, the better able you are to pick up early warning signs. That way, you can pick and choose whatever coping mechanisms work best in that particular situation, before you end up falling in a heap or bouncing into trouble.

A stitch in time saves nine. That's the old saying. Trust me, it works. The earlier you pick up on troublesome moods or thoughts or energy levels, the better. It's easier to manage and deal with.

Avoid drama. Bipolar people tend to love drama. DRAMA! They thrive on big events happening in a big way. Part of it is that bipolar people thrive on experience, and the bigger the better. What most people misunderstand about bipolar is that we are not attention seekers for the most part. We are experience seekers. The attention comes from the way that we seek those experiences, from the way that we love to live life on the edge. Part of that is the risk-taking component of bipolar behaviour.

Drama is addictive. It fires our adrenaline. It makes the go-go juice in our brains pump. It's fun. It's also a sure-fire way to continue jolting from one extreme to the other, and more often than not, we leave a lot of collateral damage in our wake, in the form of broken relationships, lost jobs and crippling financial debt.

I'm not saying that we need to embrace a life of controlled boredom. Just screw down on the drama. Be aware of it. Don't go seeking to increase it or revel in it too much.

Practice Mindfulness. Mindfulness, simply put, is making sure that you are "right here, right now". It is a form of meditation, a way of appreciating and experiencing the world around you. Forget about your past or your future. Focus on this "Now" moment that is actually the only moment that will ever exist. Observe and experience the sensations of tasting this apple, or looking at that drop of dew sparkling in the morning sun.

I have been gradually increasing my mindfulness meditation to the point where it is a major part of my every day. For me, meditation should not be about sitting uncomfortably cross-legged for 30 minutes a day at 9:30 each morning, chanting a calming mantra and focusing on emptying my mind. That is a load of bollocks as far as I am concerned. Meditation is simply living life in the now, without all of the constant chatter of my thoughts and emotions distracting me, flitting around like butterflies. Meditation can be practised at any time in any place. You can be standing in a crowded noisy train getting bounced this way and that, and still be meditating.

Meditation is calmness. It energises you. It relaxes you. It increases your resilience. It improves your focus. It allows you to cope. It makes you appreciate life on so many more levels than you ever thought possible. It is the single most important wellness strategy that I have.


Coping Mechanisms

Build a strong support network. This is such an important part of your coping mechanisms. In a lot of ways, it is also a wellness strategy. Surround yourself with people who either understand or are willing to listen. It can be family, friends, a work or school counsellor, Lifeline counsellor, mental health drop-in centre, online resources such as SANE, or your mental health team comprised of your General Practitioner and psychs and other therapists.

You need to know that you have someone you can turn to for help if needed. One of the major hurdles of mental health issues is that they can be very isolating. Depression is expert at telling us that we are worthless or that there is nothing that can be done to help. This is a lie.

Ask for help if you need it. Reaching out for help when we need it is one of the most important things we can do. Don't suffer needlessly in silence. Despite what we may believe, there are lots of kind-hearted people out there who are willing to help, who want to help.

Breathe. Breathing is life. It's that simple. If you find that you are becoming increasingly anxious or out of control, focus all of your attention on breathing. Focus on slow, deep breathing. Breathing is life. Control your breath. Control your life. I have found this to be a great coping mechanism when I am close to losing it.

Channel your energy. This is another one of those things that is both a coping mechanism and a wellness strategy. If you have too much energy, you can become very anxious, agitated, angry or fearful. When you are hypomanic, often you have too much energy. it builds up, and even though you are rushing around at a million miles an hour, it can keep building and building. Your thoughts start to race. They may even start to become incoherent to you. You start to panic...

I find ways to channel my energies. I write to channel my creative energies. I exercise to channel my physical energies. I sit down and have a good cry every now and then to channel my emotional energies. I challenge myself with puzzles to channel my intellectual energies. I contemplate the eternal verities of the universe and express my gratitude to channel my spiritual energies.

So much energy. And it will tear you apart if you allow it to build up to dangerous levels within you. Even the most positive of energies can have vastly negative effects on your life if it is not applied correctly.

This will pass. Bipolar is cyclical. The ups and downs come and go. Remind yourself that whatever you are currently going through, this will pass. Whatever agitated state or depression or fear you are facing, it will pass, and you will come out the other side again.

I think it was Winston Churchill who said one of my favourite quotes - "If you are going through Hell, keep going." That one simple quote has helped to sustain me through some of my darkest and worst moments. This will pass...

Do not feel bad about feeling bad. One of the biggest traps that we fall into when we are navigating the ups and downs of bipolar is to feel bad about feeling bad. Everything may be going great in our lives, and suddenly we are hit by a bout of depression. Then we start to feel bad, to feel guilty, about feeling bad. All that does is to create two lots of feeling bad, where before there was only one.

Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). CBT can be a useful technique for challenging negative or destructive thinking, and replacing it with more positive or helpful thinking. Work through the process of identifying the faulty thinking that is causing you distress. Reason your way through it, and find your way to a more helpful way of viewing things or thinking about them.

Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT). Sometimes, CBT just doesn't cut it. For me, acceptance is such a simple and powerful mechanism that helps me to cope. Instead of fighting all of the dumb crap that my brain or moods are manufacturing out of thin air, I just take a deep breath and accept it. I let it wash over me and run its course. I will be there when it has passed, wiser for the experience.


So, anyhoo, that was some of the coping mechanisms and wellness strategies that I apply in my every day. When all is said and done, it is all about finding the things that work best for you. Explore. Experiment. Learn. In time, all of these things which at first are so very difficult to do become like second nature. You eventually train yourself to the point where you can cope with the extreme ups and downs of bipolar in ways where you don't just survive it, you thrive with it.

These coping mechanisms and wellness strategies are not just useful for surviving the extremes of bipolar. They can be applied by anyone in their day to day lives, to improve the quality of their lives and the breadth and depth of their experiences.

If anyone has any questions, don't be afraid to ask. And please, anyone else, add to this list of coping mechanisms and wellness strategies. What works for you?

Hugs and happy vibes beaming to you all...

Re: Coping Mechanisms and Wellness Strategies

Hi @Silenus,

Thank you for sharing this wealth of information. I have read a couple but will need to sit down and take some time to go through everything in detail.

I so much agree with the professionals that support your recovery. It is so important but yet so hard to get there. I was lucky to have a good GP from the start who was just there for me when my world started crumbling and supported me through my search for the right psychologist and psychiatrist. The waiting times make it worse, then comes the getting to know each other phase and I felt so much anger being at the mercy of a system I believed does not work.

I have a moment of confidence right now where I think I am surrounded by the right people. And I think that is the important part for me to get to understand my new diagnosis.

Looking back, I guess it is really hard to find the right professionals and I think this is due to not knowing a diagnosis. I don't feel the anger to the system I once had anymore. Most of the time I felt that the system did not want to help me.

Sending some happy vibes your way!

Re: Coping Mechanisms and Wellness Strategies

Hi @Silenus

 

Thank you so much for sharing SO much wisdom. There is so much valuable information here.

Looking forward to seeing you around the forums 🙂

Nik

Re: The Importance Of Not Taking The World Too Seriously


@Silenus wrote:


I've driven myself into deep depressions in my life on numerous occasions, and it has all been as a result of seeing the wrongs in the world and yet being largely helpless to do anything about them. I then ruminate on those ills, and my impotent rage starts to bubble. The next step in my decline is usually a deep resignation and helplessness once the rage passes, and I arrive at my usual spot in the bottom of the pit. Heck, I've been down in that pit so often that there's a reserved sign and valet parking for me...


Thank you for sharing your hard won insights and progress with us @Silenus.  I found this paragraph particularly powerful.  Until we recognise the patterns, and are willing to work on them, little tends to change.  That's true for all of us.  You've clearly come a very long way in understanding your patterns, changing your responses and gaining more control over your health and state of mind.  It's really impressive.  I hope it helps other members to have this process so clearly explained.  It's not easy but it can be done.  And unfortunately often needs to keep being done! 

Re: The Importance Of Not Taking The World Too Seriously

Haha... my pleasure @suzanne. Smiley Happy

You bring up some very important points. We must remain eternally vigilant in our ongoing journey toward better mental health (I like the term "mental wealth" myself). Just because we have recognised something within us that is faulty thinking or "damaged goods", and then taken steps to correct it or improve it, doesn't mean that it is all done and dusted and never needs to be looked at again.

Often, we backslide into old patterns. Instead of hating ourselves for this though, it is important to realise that what we are dealing with are patterns of a lifetime. These can often be so very very hard to shift or modify (and even recognise in the first place). We need to be gentle with ourselves when the inevitable relapses and backslides happen. Then we have the strength and resilience to be able to dust ourselves off and get back into the game...

So much of our life energy is wasted on finding the biggest stick around and beating the living daylights out of ourselves when we deem ourselves to have "failed". But what is failure? To me there is very little worth in the concept of failure. Any failure can be turned into a success just by reframing it in our minds. If we learn something about ourselves or about others in the process of a "failure", then there is no failure at all. It is a great success, a great victory, for it has strengthened us, increased our knowledge of self and others, and it is one more step up the self-evolutionary ladder...

I am a firm believer in neuroplasticity - the ability of the brain to rewire itself. For many years, my brain was the proverbial old house with dodgy wiring everywhere. Again and again, I would burn because of that faulty wiring. Thankfully, the brain is a truly amazing thing. Through much self analysis, grit, determination, willpower, support and knowledge from others (and a bit of luck too), it is possible for us to transcend past hurts and the faulty thinking that results from those hurts. This is a firm belief of mine, and I am committed to my ongoing life goal of self evolution.

I like to be a flag waver or a pom-pom shaker for the Self Evolution Revolution... hahaha...

Hugs and happy vibes beaming to you. Smiley Happy

Re: The Importance Of Not Taking The World Too Seriously

Norman Doidge is doing 2 day seminars in Sydney,  Brisbane and Melbourne in May this year.  The early bird fee has closed but even that was way beyond my budget.  Certainly worth attending if you're interested in the neuroplasticity of the brain and the treatment options this could involve.  If you're interested searching on his name is sufficient to find the information. 

Re: Coping Mechanisms and Wellness Strategies

Cheers for the info @Kurra

Hugs. 🙂

Re: Coping Mechanisms and Wellness Strategies

If wishes were horses (like sufficient funds) I would have registered over 2 weeks ago.   Guess thems the breaks eh.....

Re: The Importance Of Not Taking The World Too Seriously


@Silenus wrote:

I like to be a flag waver or a pom-pom shaker for the Self Evolution Revolution

 


Me too!  Def the pom-pom option 🙂

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