Looking after ourselves
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โ10-07-2017 09:34 AM
โ10-07-2017 09:34 AM
Getting and staying well - get together
Good morning everyone and
Hello again to my dear friends on the forum and everyone else I forgot!
@lisajane@Appleblossom @Kurra @Determined @utopia @Queenie @Teej @Niqueeta1 @Faith-and-Hope @Sahara @BlueBay @outlander @Zoe7@Shaz51 @eth @CatMeowCatMeow @suzanne
Yes, I have taken another break from the forum. And this time I join more for the reason of inspiring others and giving others hope that there is light at the end of the tunnel.
No, I haven't magically solved my C-PTSD and yes, I still have flashbacks, intrusive thoughts, I have good days and bad days, I have better days and worse days.
But I think, I am "stable"? I don't really know how to call it, but my psychiatrist asked me the other day, "you look well, and what can you do to keep it that way?" Woah, that is a completely new question!
I did the self-care challenge from The Mighty in the month of June and I think the most important part in that self-care challenge was the sentence underneath: "Friendly reminder: it's ok to miss a day". And believe me I DO MISS days, sometimes completely. Like last week my sleeping patterns got totally out of whack, so I rested a day, and slept, because I know what happens if I don't rest. Even my husband reminds me to rest if I'm running around all day non-stop. It's good to have people remind me, and I am actually listening to them now ๐ Now THAT is a HUGE change!
I was desperate when I started the self-care challenge and I was wondering how it would help, and I was questioning why I would put such simple goals as "brushing your teeth, getting dressed, having a shower..." on there. But it has helped and I have adjusted my goals a little bit for this month.
I also took responsibility for my medication and especially stopped doing anything that interferes with my meds, mainly I stopped drinking alcohol.
So I would like to use this platform for us, anyone with or without a mental health issue (you don't need to qualify for these forums ;)), to share how we get through each day and how we try to improve our lives one little step at a time. And I will share, every now and then, what helps me and what I have or am implementing to stay "stable".
Hope you all have a good start to the new week!!
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โ10-07-2017 09:38 AM
โ10-07-2017 09:38 AM
Re: Getting and staying well - get together
Good morning @Former-Member ๐
Wow what a nice update to read this morning, thank you so much for sharing how you are going, I am so pleased to hear how you are doing and how things have been for you lately, a lot better than the last time that is great news that you are finding some self-care is helping you and the small things do add up and help.
It sounds like you have really challenged yourself to do those self-care things and finding ways to manage, glad you are taking care of yourself ๐
Lunar
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โ10-07-2017 02:14 PM
โ10-07-2017 02:14 PM
Re: Getting and staying well - get together
@Faith-and-Hope and @Former-Member
I have tagged you in the new post ๐ Big hugs x
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โ10-07-2017 02:15 PM
โ10-07-2017 02:15 PM
Re: Getting and staying well - get together
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โ10-07-2017 02:18 PM
โ10-07-2017 02:18 PM
Re: Getting and staying well - get together
Hello @Former-Member Thank you for tagging me ๐
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โ10-07-2017 02:39 PM
โ10-07-2017 02:39 PM
Re: Getting and staying well - get together
So good to hear the positivity coming from you @Former-Member
You have re-joined to inspire others and you have inspired me ๐ I like to think of my tunnel as like one of those big long ones you drive underground in the city - the lights are actually all the way through the tunnel. There's a few twists and turns, dangerous bends where the lights are broken, but I don't have to get to the end of it, to get to the next light ๐
I think part of 'stability' is accepting the bad days and realizing there'll be good ones as well:)
I've never heard of the challenge you did, but I think the reminder you got from it is very important . . . and kind of part of accepting the bad days.
Yeah - the elusive balance - how to stay stable - that is an entirely new question?
I completely understand what the likes of 'brushing your teeth, getting dressed and having a wash' should be on self-care lists; and am a little ashamed to admit I really don't do those things very well.
Though on a more positive note, I've done my dishes 3 days in a row now! And am intending to get my but of this Forum soon and start washing clothes! ๐
I think stopping alcohol was a huge step for me, as for me personally I think it led to other substances. The alcohol didn't seem to work quick enough, or just not enough full stop - so I'd add to it . . . very bad scene.
I'm looking forward to what you share:) I don't have anything in particular to share, I think most people know what I know. Just take one thing at a time, too many things overwhelm me. Try to focus on the postives that are there instead of the negitives that can always be found.
Love to you Flower
Niqua
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โ10-07-2017 02:45 PM
โ10-07-2017 02:45 PM
Re: Getting and staying well - get together
@Former-Member @Former-Member
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โ11-07-2017 01:23 PM
โ11-07-2017 01:23 PM
Re: Getting and staying well - get together
Hi @Former-Member
Well I think doing your dishes 3 days in the row is well worth a mention!!!
I like your idea of the tunnel, but mine has smog and fires sometimes ๐ I've hit a bad batch of smog this morning and my headlights weren't working, so I pulled up on the side and had a nap.
So this morning was a bad morning (not worse, just bad) and I slept most of the morning. This irritates me, as I have SO much to do. I'm tired now and have no motivation, but I have plans for the later afternoon and will not cancel. Even if I have another nap before I go. Previously I used to knock myself numb with meds and continue to plot along, or go asleep with meds. I have figured out, that I get so exhausted when I feel like this morning, that I don't even need additional meds to sleep. I will sleep. I guess it is a way of being kind to myself, giving my mind a rest when it's working in overdrive.
One thing I started doing, like I said yesterday "not every day", is write a daily planner. Mainly to understand that I cannot do a million things at one time, and leave them unfinished (one of my BAD traits) and also to have some sense of achievement in the evening. I rarely manage to do everything on my list and will start to postpone non-urgent issues (basically anything, including myself, that does not have to do with the welfare of my pets) half way through the day. Accepting that I can opt out of my own plan is a huge achievement. Today I did not do a plan. That's being kind too, I think.
Take care of yourself x
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โ11-07-2017 03:04 PM
โ11-07-2017 03:04 PM
Re: Getting and staying well - get together
Hello @Former-Member๐
Thank you for understanding what a huge thing it is to do the simple tasks - 4 days in a row with the dishes and 2nd day running with the washing now! and it's like what I'd hoped for is happening - other things are getting done - making my bed, getting the fire together in the day light, putting away piles of junk ๐
Everybodies tunnel is different and those dang tunnels change all the time ๐ Sorry yours is smogging today Good on you for recognizing you need the sleep!
Medications are a very individual thing, Doctors had out these pills that affect your brain . . . and yet they admit they don't really know all that much about the brain!?! No wonder it's such a hit and miss thing.
I think it's definately being kind to yourself to give your mind a rest when it's working in overdrive.
I used to write a lot of lists {I have a terrible memory}, but my lists would get impossibly long. Then I would try to organize the impossible into smaller but more multiple lists. Sometimes it did help a bit, sometimes it did the opposite and made me feel useless and a failure even unto myself and what I wanted. Thank you for giving me the thought that I can opt out of my own plan - of course I can . . . it's my plan (I am a little concerned I may be starting one of those impossible lists at the moment). I've had another thought, I'll have a regular time interval, say a week, where what hasn't been done - I'll allow myself not to do! I'll screw up that list, throw it away and start another one ๐ Oh, you have been inspiring for me :)
Be kind and gentle to yourself, allow yourself ๐ {I think allowing myself is going to be a new thing for me!}
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โ12-07-2017 07:48 PM
โ12-07-2017 07:48 PM
Re: Getting and staying well - get together
Patience!?