Lived Experience Forum

[Roughsea]

Content/trigger warning

Hi everyone, I was recently diagnosed with bipolar II with psychosis and I am having a really hard time with accepting it.

My journey started in July last year when originally my doctor thought it was depression. After months of ups and downs a psychiatrist gave me my diagnosis in Feb this year. Since then I have been on so many different medications. 

My bipolar tendencies only started last year which is why I am having such a hard time. The past few months I have been struggling with my medication being increased and the new side affects. I really want to talk my psychiatrist about going off my meds because I don't know who I am off them and I still don't believe the diagnosis is real. 

I need some advice on how to address this with my psych and just general advice. 

[FloatingFeather]

Hi @Roughsea,

Welcome to the Forums. My name is FloatingFeather and I am one of the peer support workers at SANE. Please know this is a safe and anonymous space with many kind members with a variety of lived experiences. 

Thank you for sharing some of your story with us - I know it can be difficult, particularly with the first few posts. Your story resonates with me as a close family member of mine was diagnosed with Bipolar I many years ago. When he was first diagnosed I remember it was quite a rollercoaster ride for him around medications (and their side effects), understanding the diagnosis, processing what was going on etc. It did take time but through the help of his professional team he did find the medications that worked best for him. He also tried to learn as much as he could about Bipolar, reached out to support from others with the same diagnosis, and saw a therapist. 

I would encourage you to be honest with your psychiatrist around how you are feeling as I would imagine your thoughts and emotions around this are very relatable to a lot of people in similar circumstances - at the end of the day your psychiatrist is there to support you as well as they can.

Here is a link to to some lived experience forum discussion on the SANE forums that you may find useful bipolar discussions. I have also attached this factsheet and guide for bipolar.

Please be kind to yourself - it takes time to process any diagnosis. It also can take time to find the medication and techniques that work the best for you. I find speaking to others that have lived experience can also be a great benefit too. 

Warm wishes,

FloatingFeather

PS. On an aside, if you want to directly chat with someone on the Forums use the @ symbol and then start typing their name directly after it. A dropdown box should appear, and you then select their name. This ensures that they are notified of any posts you mention them in.

[Dimity]

Hello @Roughsea and welcome. You have a good name... it sounds as though you've experienced ups and downs and perhaps some stormy weather.

Talking to your psychiatrist about your meds is definitely a good idea but you can also do some of your own research to understand what you're on and why. Some meds may be antipsychotics, others antidepressants or mood stabilisers.  It can take weeks or months to titrate the dose so it's effective without too many side effects. It's often a balancing act and involves an element of risk analysis deciding what you hope for and expect in terms of avoiding current and future illness. Side effects can be unpleasant but can sometimes be mitigated by lifestyle choices such as diet, exercise, hydration,  sleep hygiene and social connection. For me it's a work in progress and I've had to look beyond my psychiatrist for additional support, some of which my gp has arranged with bulk billing and some community-based or government sponsored. Whether it's all worthwhile only time will tell. All good talking points. I'm currently weighing up the potential of a new med and I appreciate my psychiatrist letting me make an informed choice. Happiness wellbeing and a sense of security all come into the equation and I don't think there's necessarily a clear cut answer, but it's a relative luxury to be able to reflect on it while not acutely unwell. Good luck.

Dimity