Lived Experience Forum

[Adge]

Thanks so much everyone.

It's so hard for me to type, or to concentrate on anything - because of the pain & sleep deprivation.

That explains my disjointed & delayed posts (replies).

I have not been my usual energetic bouncy self for several weeks.

I'm still needing that light at the end of the tunnel - I have not got through or found any resolution for this shoulder bursitis & neck nerve pain yet.

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[nashy]

Alright amazing people - Final question! This one is for you @Robert_Lifeline

What are some common misconceptions clients tend to have about the holiday season from your experience at Lifeline?

[Robert_Lifeline]

@nashy  Thanks.

Continuing from the point about familial expectations, often we may feel the pressures of family and feel we can’t/shouldn’t take time out for ourselves (doing so would be ‘selfish’). I think in general there are a lot of ‘shoulds’ opeating at this time of the year. If we can let go of that stuff/conditioning/those beliefs and do what serves us the best in terms of helping us be happy, healthy humans, we are practising good self-care and taking responsibility for ourselves as adults.  

[Razzle]

@nashy Good question.  I often wonder wether I just have it all wrong - I’m interested in @Robert_Lifeline answer here

[Adge]

Such a good question @nashy

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[Robert_Lifeline]

I think we can think we have failed if things don't go perfectly/to plan - it's about revisiting what is important to us, the things that really matter - and, how much of that can we communicate to others so they may contribute to us getting our needs met and 'coping' better in general (feeling better)

[nashy]

I think it's important too to remember we're not alone in these feelings. I think at times when it comes to feelings of abandonment, complex trauma, challenging family dynamics we can feel we're the only ones (the never ending tv commercials do not help!). The reality is many people find this time of year a challenge, I wonder @Robert_Lifeline if there's a subtle stigma around speaking up about how difficult the holiday season is to others?

[Robert_Lifeline]

I'm interested to hear others' thoughts on this matter!

[Former-Member]

Hi sorry I'm late hope I havent  completely missed it

[Zoe7]

I find having a dialogue in my mind when things don't go according to plan really helps. It is about not having heightened exectations and more going with the flow but also knowing that I have pre-planned what I can say in those instances when things are getting a little difficult for me in a social situation. Family will inevitably 'push my buttons' at some stage but I am getting much better at walking away and taking time out for myself. I also will have my dog withh me so that is a great excuse to spend time on my own with him in the backyard.