Lived Experience Forum

[Snowie]

@Bow hoping you got some sleep last night and today goes well.

Sending lots of love 💜💜

[Bow]

Thanks @Snowie @NatureLover 

got some sleep last night. Darling D came and woke me way too early though! And then she was really emotional this morning. Lots of tears. I nearly gave her the day off, but we eventually managed to calm her down and she went off to school. 

I’ve been out at the shops this morning. Picked my new reading glasses up. Did some shopping for my nieces birthday. And a list of things that mum needed. 

can see myself easily starting to spiral. My eating disorder is in a really bad place. There is so much hatred. So much negative self image talk. I normally enjoy wandering around the shops, but I hated it today. I felt so uncomfortable. Was so conscious of people looking at my body. I am terrified to go to the party tomorrow. I want to hide away where no one can see me. 

hope today is ok for you both

[Snowie]

@Bow I'm sorry about your ED and it spiraling. I can't do anything to help but can come and sit with you hon 💕

Hoping you new glasses help. Do you read often?

[hanami]

Sorry to hear that you're struggling with this @Bow . I recall that feeling many years ago. Feels like a different lifetime for me (which is good news for you because it's proof that it can pass). But for now the feelings for you are really and awful. No matter how much your logical brain tells you people aren't looking, your emotional brain believes they are. Do you have someone you can reach out to who you can talk to about the ED in the next few days. 

Wouldn't be helping your daughter is so emotional. Nothing worse than that as a mum 😪

x

[Bow]

Thanks @Snowie 

No I don’t read much. read a bit while I was driving in hospital. I’d like to read more. Bought a few books. Will see how I go. I should read instead of spending hours scrolling! 

[Snowie]

I must admit I should read more too @Bow 

If it is a good book I can sometimes loose myself in it. Good distraction at times.

[Bow]

not really @hanami  my new psychologist is away until mid July. I’ve only seen her once and don’t know how experienced she is in eating disorder treatment. 

I have appointments with my case manager Tuesday and Thursday next week, but she doesn’t really get it. 

[Bow]

Oh yes me too @Snowie! I’ve started ‘spare’ about prince harry. I should get in and finish it.  I really enjoyed ‘the girl who fell from the sky’. Couldn’t put that down. And the Grace Tame book was good too. 

[hanami]

Sorry to hear that @Bow 

It's good to talk to someone who 'gets' it.

Have you ever used the Butterfly Foundation's webchat?

x

[Snowie]

I remember you telling me that you brought "Spare". Haven't purchased it yet. Have about 6 books at home I have to get to before I buy any new books @Bow