Lived Experience Forum

[Mazarita]

Hi again @24601, it's great that you are able to have a bit of a laugh about freaking the other day after posting on the forum. The forum gets easier the more you do it. 

I have found too that different people have different ideas what my problems are. I am 55. The first diagnosis I received about 25 years ago was depression and anxiety. This was later revised in 2008 with a bipolar diagnosis. Just recently I have had avoidant personality disorder added to this. I sometimes get obsessed with my 'labels', but I also know it's not gospel, and it's not all of who we are.

There are a number of people on the forum who find it hard to leave the house, myself included, though this has improved for me over the past few years. I believe a part of this improvement is due to reaching out and sharing on this forum. I still have days where I can't leave the house though, but not nearly so many as I used to.

Cool that you are into drawing, music and audiobooks. I am into making little videos, and I go to an art group run by a community mental health organisation. 

Keep posting at your own pace. 

[CheerBear]

Hi @24601 ☺ Just wanted to say hi and see how you're getting on as I've noticed you about. No pressure to reply if you don't feel up to it or you'd prefer to stay in the background (that's so totally ok too) but thought I'd quietly wave here too in case you felt like saying hi again. Nice to see you about however it is 😊

Hope you're going ok

[24601]

HI @CheerBear, how are you? Sorry it's taken a few days for me to respond. It made me happy to see you saying hi and I wanted to reply sooner but was a bit stuck when it came to finding words. The world is very big and scary at the moment with lots of out of my control things happening so I have been doing lots of hiding at home with my dogs and lots of distracting drawings that can sometimes take weeks to finish. One day if I'm brave enough I might put some of my drawings on the art thread here and you can have a look if you like. I wanted to tell you that your crochet mandalas are amazing. I use to knit a lot but could never get the hang of crochet. I can imagine the amount of time you put into your work and it's so worth it
I'm really glad that you wrote to me on here. I can find it tricky to reach out. It's one of those don't speak until your spoken to things I guess.  I'm like that normally until I get comfortable with people. I observe a lot but find it difficult to actually interact so am usually happy enough in the background. I'd like to be able to put myself out there a bit more but it is hard. It's something I'm trying to work on.
I hope things are going OK for you and this year is a bit easier than the last.

[24601]

I typed that last message on my computer and it didn't quite come out as I planned. If it doesn't make sense I'm sorry. Still trying to get the hang of this.

[CheerBear]

Hi @24601 ☺

It's really nice to see you here. I caught the last message you posted that seems to have gotten jumbled up in funky forum formatting and it isn't here now. The formatting thing gets me sometimes (it used to get me much more often) and my nicely typed posts would get very jumbled up, which did my head in. I worked out that it happened mostly when I used the app on my tablet. It happens - and we're all pretty good at de-jumbling formatting issues, auto correct fairies, half asleep posting etc.

From what I hear (and I really hope it's ok to reply - please let me know if it isn't and I'll edit this out) you can find words tricky to find sometimes? You're not alone here with that at all. There are so many more people who read than who comment and I'm guessing there are lots of different reasons for that. If it makes you happier to stay in the background, then that's definitely totally the right thing to do ☺ This can be a really great place for challenging that too, if you do feel like saying a hi or writing and seeing where it goes. I'm not sure if you've noticed but sometimes people speak with pictures or emojis here, or even a quick "hi everyone", or they hang out on light threads or only in certain threads that feel right at the time - whatever works for you.

I'm also thinking that things might be pretty tricky sometimes in your world. Again, you're definitely not alone with that (though I don't know what 'that' is but I am almost certain someone, somewhere here will be able to relate to some part of something). Listening if you feel like sharing sometime, and smiling seeing you in the background if that's where you are ☺ Very interested in your drawings if you find yourself wanting to share too.

Take care and thanks for replying (and again a grrr to funky forum formatting!).

[Appleblossom]

Hi @24601

It can take a while to get the hang of the site. A lot of us have lost posts here and there. Glad you could look back at a panic and get some perspective on it.  Thats a big step to healing.

I have been so socially awkward for so long irl it was painful, maybe I am a pain for others, but I try not to be. In the end I just jumped in here on the site, warts and all. Sometimes I go under, but mostly I manage to swim. Its a good bunch here.

Take Care

[frog]

@24601 Hello again  Your name 24601 had a good ring to it and I only just recognized from where! Les Mis is my favourite musical, so you'd think I could have worked it out sooner  Good choice!

I like writing, but sometimes it can take a long time to get my thoughts into words. Depends on how organized, or not, my head is too. Sorry your last post got messed up. I think there may be some bugs in the forum lately because I have not even been able to get on for several days. I missed the Friday Feast, which can be a lot of fun because it's deliberately light, even escapist, fun. It's a good one to watch along.

All the best, frog.