SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)

[soul]

Hey @Former-Member - having one of those days, huh? My Mum used to watch "Heartbeat" Never seen it myself. Fish and veges sounds healthy. Don't forget your meds.

I've started yoga and am really enjoying it. Unlimited month long deal. Reckon I should go every day? There are up to five sessions each day. Wouldn't it be funny if someone went to every one of them? Don't think I'd get away with doing the pregnancy or school kids sessions though. 

[Former-Member]

Hi @soul, how's ya day? Good on ya for doing yoga, good for longevty & flexibility. x5 sessions a day would be 'over he top' - unless of cause they make it an Olympic sport. Haha

🌷🌿

[soul]

I got a special one month unlimited deal so I'm busy trying out all the different ones @Former-Member. Really enjoying it too. I guess they then want to hook you up with a long term membership. Haven't looked at the deals on offer yet but I can see this as being part of my exercise routine. How are you doing?

[Former-Member]

Sorry @soul, had to take a call. I am OK, tired, worked long day at the shop. My clutter is overwhelming, can't seem to get my head around it. Keep busy at work, slug out too much here. Arthritis acting up too after overdoing it. Bit somber over that friend dying yesterday, and my son has had to take more time off work with Bronchitis coming back and coughing up blood 😞 They're a worry. It was him who called. Guess all these things are part of life. Just trying to do the best I can. Thanks for asking. Getting tired. Good Night 🙂

[soul]

Sleep well @Former-Member - tomorrow - onwards and upwards!

[Faith-and-Hope]

Feeling dor you over the loss of your friend @Former-Member ...... and I have felt on the outer when I lost a friend a few years ago .... I wanted to step up but there wasn't space to, and it hurts on top of the hurt. So you do what you can anyway, to tick the box that honours the relationship that you had with her .... and a big box of biscuits sounds perfect.  They will have people stopping in to see them, and a coffee and a cry over biscuits is part of the healing .....

My friend I knew from play group.  She had one adopted daughter the same age as my twins.  When she was found to have cancer, I visited a little more often when I could ..... she asked me to promise to help look after her daughter when she was gone, and had recently moved her to our school.  When she passed, I went to the funeral, left it for a week or so because I hardly knew the father - he was spending a lot of time in Malaysia where my friend had felt ostracised for religious reasons - then called to ask about having the daiughter over for a play-date.

The father explained that he was in a relationship with another lady .... referred to her as his "wife, or girlfriend, or whatever you want to call her" and told me he had changed to that woman's religion a year or so ago, but didn't want to upset ____ (his actual wife) on her deathbed by telling her any of this, so he had kept it secret.  I presume he had married the other woman under their religious law and was visiting her for all his business trips away.  She also had a daughter the same age as his, and he promptly took her out of our school and placed her in the religious school associated with his new faith with her new sister.

That was it.  I couldn't do anything other than hold the daughter in the light with every thought of her .... which I still do .....

I hope you have made / make the biscuits and I am sure your card is carefully and thoughtfully chosen out to honour the family of children, and the friendship you had with their mother ....

Big hugs .... 💜💐💕

[Former-Member]

Thanks @Faith-and-Hope, its hard when an important part of the grieving process is snatched away from you like with your friend, and the wonderful input you could have had with her daughter. Not fair on her either. Obviously the dishonourable husband has made sure he's fine, as so many do when they can't man-up under pressure. 

To be honest, this friend that died has been fighting the cancer ever since I joined the small clicky church group. She was way too busy to ever have time for me (5 kids, home schooling, hubby, church activities, gym instructor...), never came to my home or invited me anywhere. But we did have home church at their beautiful big house often, and her children just loveable to everyone. So, what am I trying to say - we weren't that close.

However, I have prayed, cried for her, dropped in flowers often, sent positive emails & tx, drove her to city specialist for chemo... ... But i fear my tiny offerings, as hard as it is for me to even function, was still crumbs under the table in the avalanche of support they are receiving from so many, especially the ministers wife and elders and cancer organisations and  extended family. I've never seen so much sustained practical help and support. Accept the week my girl died, wow, I saw it then, but it was gone in a flash. All of it. Everyone. Needless to say I went under. That won't happen with this family. I think maybe there is a little favouratism in the house.

Also a bit disappointed today my son is too busy for me I o come visit this weekend (he's been so sick). Just be nice to connect face to face. Got a feeling he's had enough of his job and glad for medical time off. Wish he didn't do IT but he will find his way. Be in fiscal trouble if he loses this job though. 

Wish I wasn't chubby, middleaged, single and depressed. Any wonder I'm not swamped by requests for company. Surprised my volunteer work wants me - on the cheap I guess lol

Hmm, how did I end up in bed again, oh that's right, got a bad headache, took pills and having a cry. Silly really. It will pass. At least I did the dishes and cooked a spinach omelette today. 

Have Read about all your happenings F&G, you'll have to stay grounded and strong at heart yourself. Hope the fallout isnt too hard on everyone, sometimes things get worse before they get better 💜

I need to go shopping for ingredients to make the biscuits. Big eeffort atm, not sure why, at least I done dishes today 🌷🌿

[Faith-and-Hope]

Just "have a day" @Former-Member ..... one Foyt in front of another, and see what tomorrow brings. Keep to self-compassion ..... you have a lot of goodness there - share some of it with yourself, and try not to think / feel / fear the worst ...... you don't know what others are actually thinking and you may be very wrong ......

You are contributing at your work ..... that
Is good, and it is important, for everybody, including you ......

Yes, some people receive a lot more support than others, and often for superficial reasons ..... but support is good in any case, and the lack of support you received is a motivator to reach out to others ...... cos you know how it feels ...... although it has arrived as a negative, you attribute positivity to it when you send it back out as a positive ......

Thank you for all the support you offer me .... it is gratefully received ...... yes, likely to get harder before it gets easier ..... have to keep fortifying myself.

Keep blooming where you're planted Hon .....
you're growing a nice little corner here ..... and touching others with your warmth and
compassion ..... you matter ..... 💐💕

[Former-Member]

hello @Former-Member

You have had a great deal to contend with in the last few months.

You were coping with your own grief and also helping others on here.

Despite your own grief, you reached out and compassionately offered your support to an acquaintance in need.

Regardless of how many people were around that person; your support is just as important and worthy as anyone elses.

As Faith said (I think it was Faith) sometimes we assume that people are thinking in a certain way; I am very guilty of this. Part and parcel of low self-esteem.

Offering compassion and condolences, is a gesture from the heart. There is no competition.

Each and every act should be recognised as being unselfish and caring. Anyone not seeing it this way is not being truthful and they have the problem not you.

Keep on being the loving, caring person who you are. Try not to be concerned about other people.

As others have said, now is the time to be kind and gentle to lapses.

no rush for the biscuits. make them when you are feeling better.

often the  worse part of grief is the sheer loneliness after the cards are received, the initial well wishers have left. as life goes on day by day that is when grief can seem harsher. your biscuits will be welcomed any time.

[Former-Member]

Its never gonna stop Mohill, think there's only one way out of this mess. Honest. Sorry, I'll answer you better later. Crying +++ Need to take a break from heavy. Nice to see you 🌷🌿