Raising Awareness of BPD - Flipping the Script

[HenryX]

Hello @Rosemary4 ,

I can empathise with your mishap. After going to singing at the residential aged care this morning and an extended visit with a friend, who lives in the independent living units afterward, I came back and had some lunch. The singing and the visit were really pleasant.

While making a cup of coffee after lunch, I was picking up the cup to add the hot water and spilt the little water and coffee premix down my front and one leg. I was just very thankful that it was not the kettle that I spilt.

Otherwise the afternoon was here at the desk, responding to notes on the forum and drafting the letter, about forum addresses, that I just posted.

While that note looks a bit daunting, it is just the details from which, I hope, we will be able to distill some tips and guides. There are a few little curly issues in the site that, if we all know them, and how to avoid problems arising, it will, I hope, make communication easier and more fluid.

I hope that apart from your window, things are going alright for you. Have you been able to fix or dummy up a temporary window? I don't envy you the job of clearing the glass and making sure all is safe.

With Best Wishes,

@HenryX 

[Rosemary4]

Oh you're very diligent @HenryX @@  keeping busy. You're better at getting 'out there' than me, I don't socialise at all but for shopping these days. 
Yes i had to tarp up the window over night, but found a Quick fix glass repair shop, today., took the window frame in and he fixed it for me within the hour 😊 (for $155). Good to have it done  by w'with those 2 intruders I had in my yard yesterday. 

[HenryX]

Hello @Rosemary4 

Very pleased that you were able to get the window fixed promptly and at what seems to have been a reasonable cost.

Last night, I had the normal underlying concern for you, about diminished security without the window, but I would have been more concerned had I been aware of recent intruders to your yard.

Re socialisation, I think that, on the one hand, I do keep myself open for opportunities, though possibly not necessarily "seeking" them. On the other hand, there are people in the community in which I live, who, while not being intrusive, do encourage me to be involved where it is appropriate and meets both my needs and often involves a contribution to the welfare of others, mostly of time on my part. Consequently, I gain a sense of being present with a worthwhile contribution, that adds to my own self esteem and offers others benefits also. If not for those pleasant interventions, I might indeed, lead an insular and isolated lifestyle. Also, because I live in a small community, even shopping is a social "event".

With the hope that you have a pleasant day and weekend and

With My Best Wishes

@HenryX 

[BPDSurvivor]

Thanks for that @HenryX !

I appreciate your thoughtfulness and thoroughness in everything!

And @Rosemary4 , the window is besides the point - are YOU okay? Then we can worry about the window. Hope you didn't sustain any cuts!

[Rosemary4]

Oh hi @BPDSurvivor  @@r, to be honest, I've been a bit shaken up by the two men who walked up my driveway and jumped the back fence, feet away, at the same time I was cleaning up the broken glass late in the day, then worried about security overnight,  I've had evidence of intruders before but never actually seen them. Just unnerved me, and probably why I couldn't sleep all night. I did get a few minor splinters from glass but shoes and gloves help stop that. 

Christmas tends to surfaces a lot of major grief pain for me, so guess these thing impacting, stressing me more than they should I guess. Pushing down more suicide thoughts than usual, which exhausts me, and hearts been racing all day... guess I'm tired and the stress levels are off the chart. But being kind to myself, resting a lot. 
Thanks for asking, good to get it out a bit. How are you tonight?

[BPDSurvivor]

What a shake up @Rosemary4 ! 

I had my property broken into in the past. Four years on, and I still have 'moments'. 

As for my day, it's been a pretty hectic one. Just rounding the year off and preparing for next year. 

My holidays from work have begun, so between now and the end of the year, I've just doing all the things that need doing - dental checkup, health checks, vax, car servicing... just the things I also push aside. 

I'm winding down now so I can be ready for tomorrow! 

Anyway, I'm glad you are holding on even though things are tough.

Feel free to keep connecting here - you are very welcome.

BPDSurvivor

[Rosemary4]

Ok, thanks BPDS, you sound very organised with our life. Nice to see. I'm winding down too 💌

[Kbomb]

Thanks for checking in, I haven't been online for a while, have been doing ok...now am back here because I'm starting to feel the tension of Christmas expectations building...

[Gem17]

Hi @Kbomb 

Your post really resonated with me. I too am feeling the tension of Christmas expectations building.

I have recently been diagnosed with BPD and it isn't something I've yet shared with any of my family (except for my partner) so I feel like that's adding extra pressure to an already stressful situation. 

I hope that the Christmas period isn't a stressful as it feels like it will be.

[HenryX]

Hello @Gem17 , @Kbomb , @Rosemary4 , @Carlo , @BPDSurvivor  

and other members visiting this thread,

It is helpful to know that we are not alone and that there is a place where we can actually say how we feel. This time of year is stressful and more so for some than for others. Often times the stress comes from trying to meet our own expectations while experiencing significant undercurrents of pressure within ourselves. At least that is the way it feels for me. There seem to be two conflicting forces, my own expectations and my own built up tensions. There are very likely other issues, but that seems mostly the way it is.

The question for me is whether I will let myself "take a mental breath during the song". No singer can sing without taking a breath, no-one playing a wind instrument can continue to do so without taking a breath. In fact, I believe, that none of the instruments are being played all of the time. I think that I need to take “mental breaths”. They don't have to be long, but I need to take the pressure off for a little while, have a cup of tea, play with the dog, with a child or children ....... and allow myself to take the space to simply enjoy the cup of tea or game with the dog, or whatever.

Ten or fifteen minutes occasionally, is not going to make the difference between a successful celebration or otherwise. But a few of those breaks, not taken, could mean the difference between a successful gathering for Christmas / New Year or otherwise. Lets give ourselves a few of those breaks. We can plan them in, so that we know what we are investing in terms of time and number, so that we do not, by not giving ourselves those breaks, then overload and break ourselves.

With Positive Thoughts and Best Wishes

@HenryX