A long and self indulgent rave

[utopia]

♥♥♥@mazarita

[Mazarita]

Thanks @Zoe7. I know I'll probably have some more tough times with this as things proceed. Great to know you are around to chat to about it. 

Thanks @utopia 

[CheerBear]

Big big day @Mazarita! Yet you still managed to get out and visit your friend too - that takes something huge. Will be 'cheer'ing you on through it all in the Daily Goals thread (and here if it is helpful), knowing how not easy and unfair it can feel ❤️ 

[Zoe7]

Anytime for you @Mazarita 

@CheerBear 'cheer'ing her along - hahaha lol

[Former-Member]

oh @Mazarita not fair on the houseing, is there any chance it'll be sold to continue being rented? or have you alreay got a date to find a new place by? moving is annoying...
glad you got out ot your friends house,
lj

[Mazarita]

Thanks, @Former-Member. Yes there is a chance it will be sold to another investor who will keep us in it. That's what we hoped for on the last two places we lived that were also sold while we were living there. Both times then it was owner/occupiers who took over and we had to move out as well, even after all the intrusions and stress of sales inspections. 

[Former-Member]

😞 sorry @Mazarita

[Mazarita]

Don't be sorry, @Former-Member. I really appreciate you replying and talking to me about it. What you said is a definite possibility. I am just in a fairly negative mood about it all still. Hugs. 

[Mazarita]

Another 12 hour sleep. A bit calmer this morning (partly because I've taken prn meds to calm me down the past two days). Feelings of depression still heavy on my heart but not quite so shocked and frantic about it all as I was yesterday.

Looked up available rentals in the area just to see what we would be faced with if we had to join the market for rentals now. The picture is not pretty. A place we looked at two years ago around the corner, much less livable than where we are now, has gone up $55 per week from when we last saw it. We didn't apply for that place back then because one room had piles of cockroach droppings in a wardrobe. Other places in our rental range in this area just nowhere near the modest quality of the place we live now. Places that are at all equivalent to where we are living are just out of our price range now.

If we are going to have to move eventually, we are either going to have to move a long way from all social, medical and friendship supports, or else accept much, much less for the rent we can pay. The prospect of being even more cramped and on top of each other than we already are is not a happy one. Kitchens in these places, including the one we're in now, are like postage stamps. We're already paying more than 30% of our income on rent. That means we are officially under rental stress even as we are.

Clearly, I still feel very negative about this whole thing. And even more worried about my long term housing future than I already was. My biggest, long-term fear is that I will eventually end up homeless, something I've already been close to on two occasions in the past. There may be some degree of 'catastrophising' in that fear. But, on the other hand, we are in fact very vulnerable, and aging, which makes us even more vulnerable. I am on a disability pension and my companion works part-time for a wage that is less than the pension. We have no security for the future. It's pretty scary.

But, it seems nothing much more needs to be done right now except try to enjoy the visit of my mum and friend from next Tuesday, as much as I can. I will try to do that. What a shame this event has happened just before their arrival, which has been planned and looked forward to for over a year.

[Former-Member]

@Mazarita