Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[Former-Member]

It is nearly months since my husband attempted suicide. The treating team have as he has been difficult to diagnose and treat. A new 'diagnosis hypothesis' has been given and another drug offered. The absence of a definitive diagnosis has been of concern as it is difficult to make decisions as to whether or not to accept the offered medication. Has it good potential to help or is it another stab in the dark that will give nothing but further side effects and drug interactions?

Hubby has been 100% med, therapy and appointment compliant but only sees the adverse effects and treatment harm from some of the drugs and feels that nothing will help him.

I remain optomistic that we will eventually get there, maintaining hope in the presence of ongoing grief is a challenge.

[Appleblossom]

Hi @Former-Member 

There would be a lot of grief for you to deal with as well as your unwell husband.  

Sometimes the medications efficacy is seen as a reason for a diagnosis. Neither are definitive in my view.  best thing is to do own due diligence and research.

I can understand it is difficult for both of you .. maybe if he can see the meds as helpng tide him over bad times.. he could cope with some of the side effects. Feeling that the med choices are a just a stab in the dark makes it harder.

Take care

[Former-Member]

@Fatcy, keep going, 'Major Depression' like this can tale at least two years to have a since of normal. Try to build into your life some wonderful energising experiences, sight seeing etc.
"Discovery, Gratitude & Love" xox

[Former-Member]

@Former-Member, keep going, 'Major Depression' like this can tale at least two years to have a since of normal. Try to build into your life some wonderful energising experiences, sight seeing etc.
"Discovery, Gratitude & Love" xox

[Former-Member]

Thanks Tawney & Appleblossom
Did not think I would feel so emotional leading up to the anniversary of his attempt. I have much to be grateful for.
Darcy

[Shaz51]

Hello @Former-Member

How is everything going today ??

[Former-Member]

Hi Shaz51

Things slow but steady here. Starting to sort through the plethora of emotions I have experienced over the past 12 months. Having to deal with the reality of the situation whilst separating it from personal grief has been difficult.

Am slowly getting some self care happening.

On a brighter note, side effects from a discontinued med abating and we are back in business in the bedroom (hope not too much info). Further med changes planned which will take a good six months or so.

Hope things are going OK with you.

[Shaz51]

Hello  @Darcy, how are you going today my friend xx

been wonering how you are

 one day at a time here too my friend

My hubby said he has tried suicide attempts a few times in his life before we married

I am his second wife and have 4 step children

My biggest fright was when i was crying and saying i had enough , he stormed out of the room to the garage , i went up and he was preparing to harm  himself , he saw me and stopped

he has not done that again, he did put himself in hospital last year , but the meds have made a difference , still have lots of ups and downs

Hello @Former-Member, @Appleblossom

[Former-Member]

Hi Shaz51

I agree with you that meds really are just part of a treatment regime, initially they give symptomatic relief with the goal of achieving or maintaining remission.

Prior to the attempt I really knew nothing about mental illness (despite Mr Darcy's ongoing issues), not one of the many doctors he saw ever explained anything to me and I was in many ways oblivious to the seriousness of his condition, although having said that I did seem to know when to call the CAT team and I don't think they could say any of my calls were unwarranted.

I formally became his carer when he attempted and have since become his enduring guardian.

I have taken to educating myself and will no longer accept inadequate information from the treating team. I will sit tight and not move until they have answered all of the questions I have written down.

However knowledge is not wisdom and I feel so inadequate...

Bracing myself for the latest med change, it has just begun and has the potential for things to go pear shaped.

Am working on self care, had a break between Christmas and new year, did not allow anything to stress me, just went with the flow. It is important to me to maintain a sense of gratitude.

Take care

Darcy

[Shaz51]

Hello @Former-Member

yes we need to work on our self care too, which is very inportant , if we don`t take care of ourselves , we can`t look after others

Our friends @NikNik and @CherryBomb are reminding me to do xx

My hubby has been diagnosed with so many different things , they say he hasthis but his meds are for something else

now he has decided to go off his meds , I don`t know why , making me feel a bit arrgggg if you know what i mean

so i am trying to be postive, and see what happens

keep in touch my friend xx

take care