Lived Experience Forum

[Change123]

To everyone

I'm a bit embarressed when I look at the " looking after our wellbeing" section all these posts from me - I feel like I'm now the narcissist wanting all the attention and hogging it all to myself.

Just wanted to say sorry to all who are sick of seeing my posts today, I realise other peoples posts are just as important and if I have flooded the boards I'm really Sorry!

I will stop posting about this now.

Thanks I will cope.

[Former-Member]

I think we all feel that way sometimes.
I wouldn't worry about it.

[Change123]

Thanks @Former-Member

I've been going so well and just feel a bit stupid about all the support I'm asking for, feeling sorry for myself I guess but I will snap out of it.

[Pebbles]

Hi @Change123

I think it's great to have awareness around this but also wanted to say.... that's what the forums are here for! Moments of receiving by expressing current experiences and moments of giving when we support others in need. I see you doing both of these. A two way street giving and receiving, no need to feel bad about it.

Pebbles x

[Change123]

Thanks @Pebbles @Former-Member

I'm a lot better today as per my thread "emotional disciplines".

I got through it better than I would have 6 months ago so I'm proud that I achieved it without sliding too much.

@Pebbles

Like you said I think I'm getting more and more aware of my actions and how they effect others and trying to be more sensitive.

Maybe a bit too hard on myself at times, find it hard asking for help and feel guilty.

Bit in a good frame of my today - just tired.

[Sahara]

@Change123,

it's perfectly fine to write as much or as little as you want. There really is no limit and I'm sure plenty of people love to read your posts and get a lot out of them.

People can pick and choose what they read or don't read... you are just giving them plenty of choices! there is no need to apologise. 

[Former-Member]

hello @Change123 @Sahara @Pebbles @Former-Member

I felt exactly the same as you.

I was worried that i might have actually been hurting others rather than helping. I was all over the place.

I think it was in the worry room where i posted my concerns. not sure which is an example of where i am.

lovely to read the responses. You have reaffirmed my concerns.

my response to you and i can say this to you and yet not myself when i am in this state. this is a lesson an observation in itself. i put myself last still.

i can say that you have actually helped some by posting this thread. others possibly feeling the same. stopping themselves from posting, opening up, venting.

it is not by any means easy, it is extremely hard, draining and frightening putting ourselves out there.

so i say to you and others who might want to yet are not used to facing their emotions, thoughts, write about them somewhere on this site.

You are not alone, you will not be judged, yes you will probably cry and sob and yes it will be draining, painful for some. It does help though. It is not a cure. It is another step in your journey.

thank you for posting this xxxxxx

[Change123]

Thanks @Former-Member

After more junk food, glass of wine and lots of sleep I feel good today - still bit tired but realise I was out of sorts yesterday.  This family crap really took me for a 6!

[Former-Member]

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@Change123 wrote:

Thanks @Former-Member

After more junk food, glass of wine and lots of sleep I feel good today - still bit tired but realise I was out of sorts yesterday.  This family crap really took me for a 6!

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hello @Change123 @Sahara @Pebbles @Former-Member

sounds like you are enjoying the food, wine and sleep - feeling good today - you certainly need some of that.

perhaps you could factor in to your rewards - a day of not thinking about your mental illness, a day of not thinking about how you need and need not to react - a day where you can just be......perhaps you might or you might not want to tell your husband, depending very much on how he is travelling.

I find with my "load" that I tend to often overthink, this in turn causes overreaction on my part and domino effect on to husband. he immediately goes into defence mode. he feels that i think that he is not being supportive enough, he should be doing more and yet he feels that his needs are not being met. Cave man takes over. ostrich burying head in sand eventuates. sulks. we skirt around each other.  Venus and mars stuff.

so my action plan for today is not to think about mental illness at all, i am going to really struggle with this however this is where i am heading. I wish myself well and wish all others well on their action plans.

[BlueBay]

Hi @Change123

No need to apologise.  I sometimes feel the exact same way when I write my stuff on here.

We are all here to write our own stuff and we are here to support, listen and care for each other. That's the good thing about this forum. xxoo