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Re: e: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Okay for the last 20 mins we're going to look at -

Holistic self-care plans.

The following is a frame work that many professionals use, including peer workers, mental health workers, social workers.

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As I mentioned earlier, I thought self-care was something I do when I notice I’m not doing so well. I have since learnt that this plan needs to be integrated into my day-to-day life, which has been challenging.

Breaking it down, as it does above, really assisted in developing a well-rounded plan. The idea if that you have 2 strategies in each element. You could already be doing some of the things in your plan (ie: I usually get 7 hours of sleep, so I don’t have to work on that, but I still include it in my self care plan) and you might also add some new ones you want to implement.

 

I will pause for about 15 mins to allow you all to have a think about it and if you feel comfortable, share what you have included under each heading of your self-care plan.

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

@Smc They have family that they can spend time with. And I can trust that for that time they will be ok. Trouble is their family has little ability or seeming want to adapt or change the behaviours they have that drive him down into his issues. Rather it is like they deliberately pick at them, drawing them to the front of his mind until when I return he is already in a worse starting point then when I left.

I don't know what to do. Unless I am pulling them up or watching that they don't drop, pretty much any small thing can start their spiral. Even just their mother misgendering them once in conversation.

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

@Spookytookims
I use the Serenity prayer to guide me through decisions that I need to make here and particularly in my working life. Following those three steps has helped me immeasurably particularly with any misplaced guilt.

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

I agree @soul, although sometimes I think it's useful to remember that unexpected things can and do come up for people. It's very hard to feel let down but I know for some people, (me included here), it's also very hard to feel like we've let people down.

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

@NikNik I find in my job that there are many times that 'people' just want to be 'heard' and no response is necessary. It is when the conversation 'turns' to being asked for advice or they are seeking help that it becomes most problemmatic. I will offer an 'ear' and let them know that they have been heard by paraphrasing what they have said (active listening) and then suggest the appropriate 'services' or 'people' to go to for extra support. If they continue with the 'conversation' then it is essential that you are straight forward and relay that you are not qualified to 'help' but there are other 'people' that you can recommend to them that are. The straight forward and honest approach then protects bith you and them.

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

For those living as carers. I think it would be good for the person with MI -to also have a self care plan. What can they themselves do, to refocus away from anxious thoughts etc.
Putting some of the -responsibility of their own care - back onto the person living with MI.
Standingup to the doctors - hhospital and saying NO - that the patient can not come home now. That YOU won't be available to look after them.

Re: e: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Thanks for the diagram @NikNik, I think I am going to print it out and write down what I'm going to do for each element.

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

I hear you @Nevyn134, sorry I can't "like" that situation, it must be heart rending for both of you. I wish I could offer some help or suggestions. What I can offer is a heartfelt prayer that you will find/connect with helpful help soon. That sort of burden needs to be shared. 
Kindest regards, Kristin

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

@kristin Thank you.

Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

Probably my biggest saving grace is my dog. She sleeps on my bed and comforts me when I have bad dreams or panic attacks, she's my reason for getting up in the morning and going for a walk; likewise in the afternoon. She doesn't judge me and is a really good listener. Patting her is very soothing and just her presence offers me the company I need to get through the day.