Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST

[NikNik]

Supporting and being there for others when they are going through a rough time is one of the most selfless things we can do. However, we can't be effective if our own mental health is compromised. 

During this Topic Tuesday we will tackle questions like:

- How do I create and enforce my own boundaries without hurting the person I'm supporting?

- What are the different forms of support people find helpful?

- What can I do when supporting someone impacts on my own mental health?

[NikNik]

Welcome everyone,

A shout out to - @Former-Member @Bluegirl @Former-Member @Spookytookims @Isaiah @Former-Member @Josj @sharee82 @Kurra @Luna01 @soul @Former-Member @EMMMFoundation @BlueBay @janedoe2 @Ariel @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Mazarita @Zoe7 @zakh- lots of new and familiar 'faces' in that list 

The aim of tonight is to talk about:

• Compassion fatigue
• Burn out
• Boundaries
• Self-care plans 

 We will share information and ask questions, so you can share your own tips and advice.

Tonight is not about sharing specific stories of what has triggered you or what has upset you in the past, as tonight isn’t about reliving those experiences, but more about drawing on what indicators you may have had, what strategies and tips have helped in the past and also learning what has worked for others.

 If anything from tonight’s discussion causes you distress, please contact:

 Lifeline: 13 11 14 or online chat 

Suicide Call Back: 1300 659 467 or crisis chat

Please keep in mind the Forum Guidelines and remember the Forums are a peer support service and do not provide crisis support.

We'll be kicking off in 5 mins - See you soon!

[Shaz51]

Hello @NikNik 

[NikNik]

Okay – let’s kick off!

People who provide peer support, like other caregivers, need to be aware of stressors commonly associated with the helping role and to take steps to maintain their own wellness in the face of frequently encountered stressors associated with peer support.

 As people with lived experience, we can find ourselves connecting online and offline with people who are experiencing similar circumstances. It is only natural that you use your own experience to support and give advice to that person.

 Supporting someone online or offline can be tough and emotionally demanding. While you are online it is important that you consider how reading and responding to a particular discussion makes you feel. It is important for you to listen to these thoughts and feelings to help to guide you on how involved to get in a thread.

 This is very similar to supporting someone offline too. Listening to your thoughts and feelings when connecting with someone in your life is important to help determine what type of support you provide.

I thought I would start the night by asking you all –

What are some of the risks that you find associated with supporting others, particularly in a peer to peer capacity

[BlueBay]

Hi @NikNik

What are some of the risks that you find associated with supporting others, particularly in a peer to peer capacity

The risks for me are being triggered.  Wanting to help and reply back but not 100% sure on what to say or how to say it.

[Ariel]

Emotional exhaustion and limited time to reflect and recouporate

[Odette]

The risk of getting grumpy/irritable due to lack of sleep/lessened quality of sleep, and not being as effective a listener/advice giver also.  This is one of the main problems I find when helping others who I spend a lot of time talking with, especially late into the night.

[NikNik]

Yep - that is a common risk @BlueBay
You'll be happy to know we will discuss how & when to support someone in a way that is safe for us soon 🙂

[Zoe7]

Unavoidable triggers, boundaries being crossed, 'discussions' suddenly turning to include triggering details or expectations of support when someone else is receiving support on that particular 'thread'.

[BlueBay]

Yes I agree the lack of sleep doesn't help anyone.