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Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
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18 Apr 2017 07:23 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:23 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
I think for me too it's the immense guilt when I can't respond because I'm exhausted but people have tagged me. It becomes a double edged sword. I know I'm still back at the first question but @Zoe7 post made me think of it. I agree too with feeling overwhelmed sometimes.
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18 Apr 2017 07:23 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:23 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
The big lurking fear is that I'll always be tied to someone else's overwhelming needs.
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18 Apr 2017 07:23 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:23 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
Ariel - i know that feeling all too well... Except it isn't so much them being ashamed of it (which they are, to the point they appologise for existing). It is more that noone wants to hear me "complaining" about my situation. Or they don't realise how constantly I have to care for or keep an eye on him.
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18 Apr 2017 07:23 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:23 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
More self-care 'tips' :
- not reading posts that may be potentially triggering
- quickly 'scanning' posts for triggering content and then moving on without reading
- referring a member to the appropriate 'services' or asking for moderatior intervention if feeling 'out of ones depth'
- taking 'time out' if triggered by a post and responding at a later time when more able to think logically rather than emotionally
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18 Apr 2017 07:24 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:24 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
Hello @Heathcliff, @NikNik
@Heathcliff my husband does not talk about his anxiety and panic issues, until it is nearly too late and has forgotten what and how it started , he would go all day not saying a word
and when he does , I say why didn`t you tell me sooner
so i have had a couple of burnouts
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18 Apr 2017 07:25 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:25 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
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18 Apr 2017 07:26 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:26 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
Although the other day I felt that the moderator on was not caring. I felt pushed away. But it's prob just me. 😥
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18 Apr 2017 07:26 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:26 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
Restricting notifications and threads that you 'subscribe' to is another way to care for yourself - you can then support others that you are most 'familiar' with and are less likely to 'say the wrong thing' or become engaged in a triggering situation for yourself.
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18 Apr 2017 07:27 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:27 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
I guess the thing that is speaking volumes to me right now is that I don't have any self care tips to share 😳😔
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18 Apr 2017 07:28 PM
18 Apr 2017 07:28 PM
Re: Topic Tuesday // Staying safe while supporting others // April 18, 7pm AEST
These are great responses!
What I'm hearing from you all practicing self care helps you:
- Be self aware
-
take care of my own needs first.
- do what feels right for me at that moment
- finding other ways to show support
- Be aware of your own personal vulnerabilities, such as the potential for retraumatization (if you have a trauma history), vicarious or secondary traumatization (if you work with individuals who report their own traumatic experiences), and compassion fatigue (which you can develop from a combination of burnout and vicarious traumatization).
- Be able to support people better and more effectively
- Achieve more balance in your life, by maintaining and enhancing the attention you pay to the different domains of your life in a way that makes sense to you
So many coming through. Sorry to the ones I've missed!
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