Topic Tuesday // Emotional wellbeing for parents // 15 Nov. 7pm AEDT

[Pocoyo]

Thank you @PANDA. We moved back in Jan of this year and living with his parents (my other issue). Settling in was long and hard work (100 boxes shipment) plus my little girl was only 18-22 months at the time so she still needed a lot of watching. I did this by myself. At the same time, I was putting my name down for daycare, classes for my daughter and getting to know the area we live in (parent groups, parks, support services, doctors etc.). In the. Ackground of this, my husband and I had many arguments and his parents also started having complaints about me. So I felt a bit battered, emotionally. I do have family/friends support which help me stay focused.

Since then, I have taken steps to reach the point I'm at right now, where I have refocused my energies into trying a different career path and started a couple of courses. I have settled my daughter into daycare but still trying to find a daycare that can offer me a regular days.

I have spoken to him about relationship counseling but he is not willing.

I am okay, i am also looking into seeing a gp and getting Counseling. It's just challenging and I do feel generally unhappy when I think of my relationship/living arrangements.

[Former-Member]

It sounds you've done so much already to continue living your life, @Pocoyo. 

It does take one step at a time for such big issues to be addressed, and for things to begin to move forward. 

Counselling is certainly a great way to work with and through feelings of unhappiness and disappointment, and I encourage you to access some, as you are planning to. 

Sadly, we can't change the people around us, they can only change themselves. In the meantime, finding joy and supports for yourself is such a great way to stay as well as you can. 

[PANDA]

Such an important message for those who have not yet accessed supports and help and who might be crippled with fear or sense of shame@2angels. The earlier help is sought the faster the recovery... and needing help does not make you a failure!  

[PANDA]

Pregnancy and the first year after birth is a time of increased risk for family violence. 

Family violence is not only about physical abuse but includes emotional and psychological abuse.

If you feel unsafe at home or in your relationship please know that there are great services (and people) out there to help you.

As a start you could phone 1800Respect (1800 737 732) 24/7

[PANDA]

I wonder if anyone on the forums has some suggestions for those new parents who are struggling with anger or irritability... things that don't go hand in hand with the image of an 'all loving mother or father' but are such common symptoms of anxiety and depression?

It can be so hard to open up and seek help when these are the main symptoms.

[MisguidedDreamr]

I think the thing about panda is that it doesn't just go away. My daughter is nearly 1 and some days are just as bad as it was in the beginning.
Most help is offered until your child is 1. What happens then?

[MisguidedDreamr]

The thing.about public ones are they are also very quick to get you out. My daughter and I spent two week in one, i knew i needed linger but was still told I was ok. Some wear masks better than others

[PANDA]

Hi @MisguidedDreamr many services do stop at one but we speak with families each day, many who have not even begun to seek help until their child is over one. Sometimes it's because it is hard to recognise that things are not OK, and sometimes it is just that recovery takes time, often with several steps forward and a couple back.

There are many health professionals in the community who can work with a perinatal focus after your child is one. PANDA can help you locate one in your community if that would be helpful (1300 726 306 Monday to Friday, 10am - 5pm AEDT)

Every recovery is unique but there can be great comfort when you hear of someone who has travelled a similar journey. You might like to read some of our lived experience stories http://www.panda.org.au/news/recover-stories

[PANDA]

Hi @MisguidedDreamr many services do stop at one but we speak with families each day, many who have not even begun to seek help until their child is over one. Sometimes it's because it is hard to recognise that things are not OK, and sometimes it is just that recovery takes time, often with several steps forward and a couple back.

There are many health professionals in the community who can work with a perinatal focus after your child is one. PANDA can help you locate one in your community if that would be helpful (1300 726 306 Monday to Friday, 10am - 5pm AEDT)

Every recovery is unique but there can be great comfort when you hear of someone who has travelled a similar journey. You might like to read some of our lived experience stories. 

[MisguidedDreamr]

@PANDA I will seek out this information thank you.
I need all the help i can get some days I struggle to do the ordinary things or even interact with my daughter, all I can do is be there. There needs to be more awareness around this.stuff when women are pregnant.