TW: Trauma and relationships

[creative_writer]

@tyme @rav3n I rather be abandoned than be surrounded by people and not feel accepted. I don’t think that I was made to be understood and accepted

[rav3n]

@creative_writer i really do feel you with this, i always tried to find people who truly understood me and felt like that person never existed. i'm so sorry you feel this way, share your pain. i think the truth is everyone is so unique and the need to feel understood is usually a result of being constantly invalidated in the past. 

in my experience, waiting for someone to 'understand' is a bit of a waiting game - it is possible to find people who understand you but instead, its better to understand yourself and start validating and accepting ourselves so we don't rely on external validation for being 'enough'? what do you think?

[creative_writer]

@rav3n one eventually gives up trying and loses the motivation to try to form relationships

[tyme]

Do you go out to form relationships much @creative_writer ?

[creative_writer]

@tyme only on a superficial level, no one gets in too far. Kind of why I feel too scared to change psychs, can’t get myself to do it all again. I just feel like quitting psych sessions all together. Not sure if my pdoc would be in favour either. My avoidant brain is screaming too hard

[rav3n]

can i ask why no one gets in too far? is it something that they do that stops it from being more than superficial? @creative_writer 

the avoidance part of brain is so annoying, can't tell if its doing us good or just figuring out an escape out of fear 😪 

[creative_writer]

@rav3n I’m scared of what will happen if I let people in. I don’t want to get hurt nor do I want to feel rejected. It feels safer to just be alone

[tyme]

Hey @creative_writer , rejection is real and it affects most of us. 

I hope you can find a place to give yourself some space and tell yourself you will be okay.

We appreciate you for who you are.

[creative_writer]

@tyme I feel like i have to mask and be someone else just to keep others happy. It does cause burn out over time, but it’s hard to be okay with being my genuine self

[RiverSeal]

Hey @creative_writer, I think this is a common feeling and I have definitely experienced it myself. 

I used to question whether it was worth it trying to connect with people, but I persisted and met some great people. I still have thoughts of rejection, and I think it's just a human experience when we feel vulnerable.

RiverSeal ❤️