not coping

[outlander]

Ill come back soon. I get to go home now thankfully before midnight!

[Sans911]

Goodnight @Emelia8

Sadly, not without pain @Eve7. All my life I have wanted to be really good at something. And I've not been. Even my latest project is failing miserably (in my eyes anyway) and I'm utterly devastated. I feel mostly responsible for that. Because I was at a course all day today, I had to cancel my support worker. But he did ring me in my lunch break, and I got teary and upset.

Please don't tell me I'm good at anything, because I truly don't believe I am. I'm just average. And I've reached the fifth decade of my life being sub standard or average. I know that we all can't be good or great at everything. But I have never been good or great at any one particular thing. Not sports, not cooking or crafts or creativity. Most things I've done have failed or not lived up to expectations. And I just can't live like this.

[Eve7]

Oh @Sans911  I am so sad that you feel that way about yourself. I won’t tell you what you are good at even though I see many obvious talents.

I understand the pain of feeling like a failure because I struggle with that most days too which is why I’ve made attempts to end my life on several occasions.

I see how valued you are on these forums and I know that there would be people in your real life who value you. You are very important and life for many is richer with you being here.

Love

Eve7

💜💜💜

[Sans911]

I'm sorry @Eve7 forgive me. I might have been a bit harsh with my words. My head is not in a good place at all.

I'm going to get out of here. Goodnight to you, @outlander and @Snowie 💕💕💕

[Eve7]

Please be kind to yourself @Sans911  Its better that you’re honest with what’s happening.

I need to sleep now as I have ECT in the morning...fun...not.

Love Eve7

@outlander @Emelia8 @Snowie 

[outlander]

Sending love and hugs @Sans911
It might not seem like much but youve been an amazing sister to me. I feel very lucky to have you. It means alot to me 💜
Ill be around for a while of youd like to talk or just sit. Im ok with either

[outlander]

Goodnight @Eve7 i hope ect goes well. Hopefully it might be the last one if your coming home on monday 🌻

[Eve7]

Yes, last one @outlander  and hopefully never again.

💙💜💙

[outlander]

I really hope so too @Eve7 💛💛

[Eve7]

Thanks @outlander  I hope tomorrow is better for you.

💙💜💙