not coping

[Snowie]

Thats good to hear @rav3n Coffee does help!

Saw gp this morning. She's ringing my pdoc about some issues 🤦‍♀️

Besides that been on couch.

[rav3n]

@Snowie ohh are you feeling worried about GP and pdoc discussing the issues? 

resting on the couch post-appt sounds nice. do you ever just accidentally nap there? whenever i lay on the couch in the afternoon, i just accidentally dose off. but when i try sleep in my bed- nothing, wide awake.

[Snowie]

Just worried what the pdoc will suggest. @rav3n I was pretty open this morning with the gp. I wasn't intending to be, it just sort of all spilled out.

I do that too. I do dose off on the couch. I always set my alarm in case I fall asleep, so I can go pick up S from school. But if in bed, I am wide awake.

[rav3n]

i see what you mean. even though we don't know for sure what pdoc will decide, i am glad you were able to open up to your gp @Snowie do you feel a bit of relief now that you've said it?

oh that's good you've got your alarm!! i always tell myself i won't nap so i don't need one. but i've got my sister as an alarm, she'll turn on the tv and make me move off the couch 😆

[Snowie]

There have been a few times @rav3n where I've slept through school pick up, so this is the best way not to sleep through.

I know he will bring up doing ect more often, he did last time. I know were meant to put our mh first, but I just can't.

[rav3n]

@Snowie ahh yep, definitely a safe decision to have the alarm! 

it's hard prioritising mental health while also juggling with other roles like being a mum, wife, daughter, carer, etc. please don't feel guilty for filling your cup and taking care of yourself, because by taking care of you - you have more energy to take care of others. i know its much easier said then done, but i did want to remind you that it is okay to put yourself first. 

how do you feel about more ect, do you find them helpful? are there any alternatives that you're interested in trying?

[Snowie]

I think the ect keeps me more stable @rav3n I'm not sure if it helps only having it once per month. But I guess it doesn't do any harm.

I have had plenty of ect in the past and it has helped.

He will say 3 times per week and I would have to be admitted. Where I have it is over an hour away and hubby needs to take time off work to take me. Also need to arrange S getting to school.

Mum didn't cope with me being away for a night. She would never cope with a month.

I've tried other things like emdr, dbt, tms. 

[rav3n]

that's good to hear that it's been helpful in the past too. @Snowie compared to the others ones you tried (dbt, emdr, tms), has ect been the most effective one for you?

i can hear how hard it can be to prepare for admission, and as a mum it's probably hard not to feel like you're burdening others. but you look after your family with such love and care, you deserve the same back. 

how's your mum holding up? is she still visiting a psych or reaching out to dementia support services? i think i recall you mentioning a while back that she didn't mind one of the care homes - did that plan fall through?

[Snowie]

ECT has been the most effective @rav3n Seems to keep me 'stable' for longer than anything else.

Mum isn't seeing a psych. She got a MHCP but couldn't afford to pay the difference when seeing one. There were two psych's that covered the whole session with the mhcp but they were both male and she said she wouldn't see a male psych.

She won't reach out to dementia support services.

She is very stubborn and set in her ways. She is always right. Has no filter at all.

She saw a psych about 9 years ago after my Dad died. She went to one session and decided that the psych couldn't help them. Doesn't really believe in psych/counsellors etc. Has told me on more than occasion that me seeing a psych is a waste of time and money. Always questions me when I get admitted. Doesn't really believe in MH. Just says that the CSA happened years ago and I should be over it by now.

A lady is taking her out to shop and for a cuppa tomorrow. Like a carer. She has already told me it won't work just because of the lady's name. I've told her to at least keep an open mind, but she wouldn't listen to me.

Still looking into the care home. Going for another tour of it on Thursday. Have a My Aged Care assessment in two weeks to get assessed for the care home.

Sorry for the essay.

[Snowie]

@rav3n need to go

Thanks for talking to me

@outlander sorry I took over your thread. I hope things are ok for you 💗💗