Oscillation between two mind sets

[creative_writer]

@tyme, yes I have heard of it, I might read more into it. Things have felt rougher since I got sick. My throat isn’t very happy and the infection occurred on the same side as I experience migraines. I also had a pdoc appointment where my brain cracked. I was on edge. I accidentally injured myself at uni, and tried to make the injury more painful stupidly and intentionally. It’s nothing major, I’ll heal with rest. I guess it counts as a form of SH. I hadn’t SH for a while

[creative_writer]

I don't know if it's illness and stress but I can feel the agitation building up again. If people knew about the type of music I am listening to, they would be horrified. I wonder why I end up in this shitty place over and over again, I feel like I'm doing something wrong

[amber22]

Hey @creative_writer 

How are you doing?

I'm here to chat if you needed today

[creative_writer]

@amber22, my mind is on overdrive and it is going places. I can't focus on uni

[amber22]

Oh I am sorry to hear that your brain is going a bit on overdrive! @creative_writer 

Do you think that taking a break from your uni work and going and doing something for a little while might be helpful? Something that might calm your mind or help it get into a better place for study?

[creative_writer]

@amber22, I'm not studying right now, couldn't get myself to. I am thinking of making some tea, my throat and nose aren't feeling so good. I'm finding my MH is worse since I've been sick. Trauma symptoms are really getting to me today. It's harder not to feel so defined by it. There is a lot of shame around SA

[amber22]

Some tea sounds great @creative_writer I hope that your throat and nose get better, and that you don't end up getting sick!

That's totally understandable, are there certain things that help you on the days that you feel like this? Anything at all?

[creative_writer]

@amber22, I am already sick 🤧. I think I’ll need plenty of rest, I’m finding it very hard to get motivated to do things. I’ll be having lunch soon and will be taking a shower afterwards

[amber22]

I hope that you rest up and feel better soon! @creative_writer 

It's okay to not be motivated right now to do the things that you usually can do. How was your lunch and your shower?

[creative_writer]

@amber22, I have had lunch but haven’t made it into the shower, probably should push myself to go in soon. It’s hard to leave the covers when I’m feeling paralysed by trauma. I do know I’ll probably feel better after I shower. Feelings of Mental contamination is really bad right now