My Mosaic

[Snowie]

Hi dear @Bow 

I hope your mum's gp appt. goes ok today.

Hoping too that your day goes well.

Sending lots and lots of love 💕💕

[Bow]

@rav3n  I’ve never actually seen them in store, might have to get it online. They also have a teddy bear. 

I’ve only been to a few concerts. Went to John Farnham when I was 12! Human nature. Brooke Fraser. Nothing too exciting.  I really tried to get Taylor swift tickets, but no luck. She’s probably what I mostly listen to at the moment. Maybe a bit of pink or Miley Cyrus. 

[Bow]

Hi @Snowie 

mums gp appointment went ok. She needs to have a couple of tests done. 

not having an ok day here. Hope your day is better than mine

[Bow]

Hoping this doesn’t get too lost in all your notifications upon your return @Jynx  but wishing you the best birthday! Hope you get up to heaps of mischief, have heaps of fun with those dear to you and eat lots of delicious cake! 

 

[Bow]

In tears this arvo. Really bad anxiety. I have a pdoc appointment tomorrow. Another new one. A male too. An hour long appointment where I’m gonna have to repeat everything all over again and at a time where I am feeling so unstable and vulnerable. 

my case manager is away so she can’t sit in with me. My support worker is away too. They have one casual sw who maybe available but she called in sick today so who knows if she will be in tomorrow. 

I called comm mh and asked to speak to someone on the team. They put me through to some guy who is hard to understand. I explained and asked if there was someone, a female, who could sit in with me. He said he would try and find someone.

But it’s the unknown.

i feel physically sick. Why cry over someone like this???

[Ru-bee]

That's a lot @Bow and it's absolutely understandable to feel distressed and anxious over this. And then to have your supports away at the same time is really hard

I know it's not quite the same but I can sit here with you

[Bow]

If I wasn’t feeling so unstable and vulnerable @Ru-bee this may not feel like such an impossible task. But being out in the community, with strange people, strange men asking me deeply personal questions, the panic is so overwhelming. 

I had a really bad night last night. Nightmare that I just couldn’t settle afterwards and then took me hours to get back to sleep. Was one of them ones that resulted in sh. So today has been bad. Now anxiety super high about tomorrow. 

[rav3n]

hey @Bow just read about the male pdoc and your usual supports being away - i'm so sorry to hear. sucks that the sleep hasn't been good either, i imagine it makes functioning during the day much harder too. @Ru-bee had to head off a lil earlier tonight, but i'd be happy to sit with you. sending you lots of love 💙

[Bow]

Yep big day tomorrow @rav3n  and I’m freaking out 

[rav3n]

@Bow totally valid to feel overwhelmed for tomorrow, wish i could come support you myself!! is there anything that can help you feel a bit more prepared for tomorrow? maybe like writing down what you want to talk about? 

OH and do you have any self-care activity planned for straight after? 

is it possible to request the pdoc session to be over the phone instead (if that helps)? 

there's still a chance that the casual SW might pop in so i'm keeping my fingers crossed for you!!