I'm in a nest

[outlander]

@CheerBear i hope all your appointments go well for you tomorrow

have i missed soemthing? surgury?

[Faith-and-Hope]

Thanks @CheerBear

[CheerBear]

@outlander - probably yes. It's not a surprise and it's not unexpected in a way. I actually meant to write to you because it started up again in a round about way following an appointment with a women's health nurse. This is a good thing as living in 'this is not happening land', wasn't making it go away and things have been getting worse. I went to this appointment a few weeks ago but made it when you were going through your really hard time facing it all a couple of months ago now. Not sure if you remember but at the time I mentioned that your bravery/courage had inspired me to take the step to making a very overdue appointment. I researched and found an SA trained nurse and waited for the appointment. Turns out it was pretty important that I did. Hope it's ok to mention it, the last thing I want to do is trigger you, but I did want to thank you and to let you know that you gave me some really helpful and important motivation. So thank you 🙂

[outlander]

i do remember that CB, you said you were going to arrange an appointment becasue of what id had found out during one of my exams. its fine to meantion it, your not triggering me at all. do you want to share what it is that they found? i promise its not going to trigger me and your most welcome!

@CheerBear

[CheerBear]

Thanks @outlander. What's happening is not really something I can share here but thank you. It's going to be a long process but baby steps and big breaths and I'll get through it 🙂 Little baby step tomorrow is all I have to worry about at the moment (and not even really at this moment because it isn't tomorrow yet). I/we've got this 💪

[outlander]

no worries @CheerBear i think i get the gist of what it could be

im always here to lend a hand to squeeze or a shoulder to cry on or you can come get eaten by the pillow anytime you like

and yes you will get through this, your a tough cookie

[Phoenix_Rising]

Good evening nesters,

This is a super super quick flyby.

@CheerBear it sucks that you have to deal with Centrelink. One of the main reasons I feel I need a psychologist is because I know that places like CL care more about what those "experts" say than about what I say. Thus it is extremely important to me to feel I have someone who I can trust with paper work-type stuff. That is partly what kept me with Fred for so long, and what is now keeping me with (A). Right now, as it was for the last couple of years with Fred (or maybe forever with Fred, depending how you look at it), it's like I have a psychologist "on paper" even though in real terms we are getting magnificantly nowhere. I super hate that the world is the way it is. It makes me feel powerless, vulnerable and scared.

[Phoenix_Rising]

@CheerBear We are both doing super well at getting through this terribly wonky day. Only five hours left for me, seven for you (I think) and this day will be done. Phew, thank goodness we don't live on Venus!!! My brain is too puddled to talk much, but I figured we can just sit together-but-not in our wonkiness and in the mud. Right now it doesn't feel like I've got this at all...but that's just a feeling. We both have a 100% success rate of surviving every day - even terribly horribly wonky days. We will both survive this one too.

I hope everyone else in the nest has had a brighter day.

[CheerBear]

Today has sucked a lot. My appointment this morning was really tricky visiting some pretty yucky past memories of the medical mess, and I am feeling scared about what is likely to await me on that journey. I also recieved a phone call that was so incredibly lovely but sent me straight into terribly missing my old life a lot, where I spent the rest of the day. I wish I knew how long it will take to not be completely overwhelmed with these sad feelings. I was totally flattened by them today. I get so frustrated at myself that I am so easily tipped over still 😞

Tomorrow was supposed to be the hard day this week, with hearing from c-link about the upcoming job capacity assessment, my CM re the housing mess, and an interview about my experiences with the missing housing organisation as part of their program evaluation. Each one of those things has the potential on their own to throw me, and on the back of today which was unexpectedly super shaky, I am worried it's going to be too much. It's almost been too much today.

I spent this afternoon lying open and just 'being' in a few different floor yoga poses, and tonight I am wrapped like a burrito where I plan to stay until the sun comes up and I can face tomorrow's challenges.

Thank you for being such a great not-friend @Phoenix_Rising, and caring even though your super wonky day too.

I too hope it's been a brighter day for others in the nest and passing by.

[outlander]

@CheerBear ❤ ❤ ❤ 💐💐💐