@Historylover I'm never sure how to respond to anyone hurting for me. I've heard there are caring people. It's just hard to not get confused. Abusers can be very kind and show love now and then too but it's just more abuse. Please do not think I am naming you an abuser, just referencing to the confusion. I'm trying.
Aye, I'm too tired to navigate. To be honest, I actually don't need many people in my life. I've spent most of it alone. That picture should never have been caused and I truly wish it hadn't. I'm still trying to get my head around people not being worthy of me. When I think about it, I feel egotistical, mean, snobbish and probably a few more things. Then again, I'm truly starting to realise I need to change. I don't know how but I need to. I can't take anymore hits and blows.
It's very stressful having to read articles to understand how someone is treating me and if I'm being abused or if it is a normal issue that everyone goes through. Currently, my partner who lives with me wants space and time with no time frame. I read that when a partner wants space and time to give it to them. Then I read a time frame is good though. But she said no time frame. So, I don't ask because I'm too scared. Then I think is this fair to me. Then I feel selfish. I'm actually not usually like this to be honest. I had a nervous breakdown 2 ish weeks ago. I've not really recovered from it. The relationship has been difficult. I've been very hurt over quite a few things. I know I really did do my best and that's good enough for me. It's up to me to get my self worth and self esteem back on top again.
Trying to adapt to a different world to the one you have come from is very difficult. I'm very tired.
