Anyone else get triggered by the constant advice to use your support system?

[Judymay]

I have found this year really frustrated by the support system question and the assumption that we all have family and friends and support.

every hotline, health professional, self help book all priorise connections and support but what if you have tried and don't have any? How do you control that and try and move past when you're constantly asked about it. 

I had to pay a stranger this week just to pick up my medication because I had literally no one. 

[Newworld]

I get it!  Yes everyone says that however my covert narcasist ensured I would have nothing and no-one including myself by the end!  Coming out the otherside and spending my first Christmas physically alone, ended up being the best decision for me.  I have one or 2 good friends left (not left in my city but close enough I could impose myself on them if l asked) that I got to quickly see or chat to them it was just me.  It was the best.  I hung out at my home, I have an above ground decent sized kid pool I lived in night and day, looking at stars and garden/bush thru the day.  It was amazing.  I caught a bus to the city (lost my license during my narcacistic journey) did a paint class and it was the best $40 christmas gift I could ever give myself.  I would love to have picked up your meds for you if I could.  It is the gift of strangers during my Christmas, their smiles their help their general kindness and meeting me at face value.  It was a gift this year for me.

[SmilingGecko]

Hello @Judymay just wanted to say there are medicine delivery services online where you upload your e-script and they arrange delivery. There may be a medicine delivery online service that covers your area. Either that or get a taxi to pick up your medicines. That is what I have done in the past. The taxi works out more expensive but if you really need your meds then it is a good strategy. I don't know anyone either, many of my friends and family have died. Haven't met any new people since then

[MRIS]

I order all my medications via my pharmacist's app (Priceline, but Amcal have this as well), and in the "notes to the pharmacist" section I write "Please deliver these items to my home address as per usual", even though the app itself doesn't offer home delivery. Since I'm paying with credit card, the pharmacy adds the $7 or so for the home delivery that way. I only need to visit the pharmacy twice a year to drop off my scripts so they can load it into their system.

[SmilingGecko]

@MRIS I think if we have another pandemic lockdown Auspost may be partnering with chemists for express delivery again. It was a government initiative back in 2020. I wouldn't be surprised if we had another strain of covid happening again, it would be more affordable through Auspost - than paying a courier. Don't know how it worked with the post office scheduling delivery of meds. But yet another option. These services let people live alone with dignity. All these tips and tricks enable us to get by! 🙂

[Jo-anneJoy]

Yes,

It's a covertly excluding & stigmatizing assumption that everyone has family, friends, medical & community supports, and in lieu of family, partner & friends - a Good Samaritan neighbour.  

The constant advice to use your support system isn't really advice:  it's a script in a flow chart.

[Judymay]

So true it like tick a box

[IceSkater]

That's really rough, @Judymay. This isn't exactly the same but I've sometimes found myself feeling hopeless and isolated when my friends aren't available when I feel like I need them or I notice how they have more connections or support than I do. The only thing I can really do in those times is to try and gently comfort myself and think of something nice I can do for myself.

Would you be open to making more connections with others, though? It may not directly translate into a 'support system' but to have someone like things about you, or to be able to have a positive impact on someone else, can make these feelings less heavy. Local council events or groups could be a starting point for finding something in your local area?

Just some thoughts based on what's worked for me, it does sound really frustrating and isolating on your end. All the best with everything.