‎12-08-2019 10:44 AM
‎12-08-2019 10:44 AM
The realities of adulthood vs the memories of being a child... I've found that adulthood can be very lonely, and I've found that it comes with a great deal of responsibility, which can be very troublesome and burdening, even at the best of times... whereas childhood ... was actually the opposite in many regards...
‎12-08-2019 09:31 PM
‎12-08-2019 09:31 PM
NBN sorted by another person who knew what she was doing @-Liz-
Being installed next week.
Hoping you’re going ok 🌸🌻🌼
‎13-08-2019 08:41 PM
‎13-08-2019 08:41 PM
I needed this quiet dark comfortable safe space, to shut out the responsibilities if the world. It reminds me of my childhood, where the photos of my loved ones passed away smiling kindly. The neughbors dog humming lowly outside, I feel rested on the soft bed. But I hear the troubles ringing loudly in my ears. Must be the fears never ending. Illness, heavy burdens, futures frightening with extreme loneliness and isolation, in the cold harsh world that judges, pushes, hurts. I hardly able to sit up thinking piles of pointing darts my way. Then there is glimpse of kindness too. Strangers, old acquaintances , with kind looks .
In my vulnerability I open my eyes to gain a little sight. I don't know how long this grants me, here.
‎18-08-2019 05:15 PM
‎18-08-2019 05:15 PM
I feel dizzy, overwhelmed, shut in, here at home, my head aching, I don’t know how to go on. I get here, being carried, dragged, or walked myself. Then this is a point here,now frozen, dissociated from every thing else. I live here this moment in agitation and despair. I call on people, in my memory that soft love gives me total complete confidence. I hear a soft sound of care and love. So it on goes. Agitation lasts hours, even days. That the cage, would not open, to the livings of this harsh world. I begin to wonder how I get here. sound of familiar friends, happy moments, I touch my body, to confirm my physical body still healthy and alive. So in this darkness, I fell down. Until the morning will light again.
‎20-08-2019 06:18 PM
‎20-08-2019 06:18 PM
I am sitting with my mother, helping her aches and pain. Sensitized are my own aches and pains. My stomach feels an area of discomfort. My head aching. I am feeling alone again, so much this feeling in my MI. I seem to hear the sounds fading, the sights blocked. I sit up to feel my neck. My eyes began to have pains. There are so much cleaning to do. I feel disabled, much of my adulthood I feel this way. I heard my mother rocking the chair. Somehow I gained some energy. Still my mother is alive, aging but alive. That gives me comfort, but also deep sadness, knowing she is slowly walking away from me, getting weaker and older all the time. But tonight, she will still be here. And I will live another day.
‎22-08-2019 08:43 AM
‎22-08-2019 08:43 AM
Weary warrior
Inside your armour is a child
Weary warrior
Growing weary with every mile
Armour keeps your body whole
But the wound is in your soul
Weary warrior
Inside your armour is a child
Weary warrior
We need rest for just awhile
Smiles on our faces
Hearts in different places
Rivers falling from our eyes
Armour now is our disguise
Weary warrior
Inside your armour is a child
Weary warrior
Growing weary with every mile
‎22-08-2019 09:10 PM
‎22-08-2019 09:10 PM
It's dark again. The day is nearly over. I did my duty. So much brokenness in my mind.My parents calling,far in my mind. That they tried their best to give me the goodness they see fit. I don't know what the morNing will bring. In my mind I know I will carry on.My friends afar. Those years they kept me. So far I have to go alone. That God guides me on the road.That one we set apart. Lost him at turning point. Then may be life meant to be a lonely journey. So walk alone we keep going. Then the one still here. I find him standing the original place. Hey. I say.
‎27-08-2019 09:20 AM
‎27-08-2019 09:20 AM
My body aches for peace
my body aches for pain free
my body aches for loving
im hurting so much
I don’t kniw why it’s the way it is
I just want no noise
I want peace
the only way to get it
is to disappear
‎27-08-2019 09:37 AM
‎27-08-2019 09:37 AM
It seems like your having a tough start to the day @BlueBay, I hope you get the support you need from the forum but just as a reminder, if you're concerned about your safety or you'd like counselling support, you can reach out to the following services:
Lifeline 13 11 14
Suicide Callback Service 1300 659 467
Take good care of yourself today and please do reach out for support.
Dancer9
‎27-08-2019 09:43 AM
‎27-08-2019 09:43 AM
My life is chaotic crazy noisy and full of people
all I want is peace and quiet
emotional depressed in my dark hole
I just want to scream
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