@Sans911,know what you mean by undignified,went to the doctor yesterday who treated me like a child,saying it was my responsibility to be carer for my mother,regardless of having two other siblings,wish I had a job and not in this position,he was wrong.Put myself in yet another f*****, counseling session with someone who isn't in the position to understand and make judgements.
Don't beat yourself up,it's like being on a diet,and breaking it.
A few weeks ago when I was walking,I had my drunk ex neighbour driving in the bush who pulled up talking about giving up.He was sucking wine out of a wine cask,and looked pathetic,like a addict.
I was worried,the way he was ,he couldn't see what harm he was putting himself in or others.I told him ,you never realise what you have until it's gone,like my loss of the property.In the paper the other day read a house burnt down out there.I knew it was him.Apparently he decided drunk, to light old cars in front of his house and when they exploded,sent a good "match" in to his house.
How he is I don't know,but he has two options,either drink more,or its enough to motivate him.He was always a alcoholic,didn't have a good family ,got given the house and property a few years ago by my neighbour who died, someone who cared for him.He did give it up two years ago and was entirely different,but was triggered by something.I guess what I'm saying
@Sans911,is there is a others struggling far worse than you and I if that makes you feel any better.
