not feeling good

[CheerBear]

That's so hard @BlueBay 🙁. I'm thinking it would be like all the past hurt floods again when you need her and she's not there. You've done so well to write a different story for your daughter by the sound of it. That takes some strength ❤

🙁 for missing A too. I can imagine she would have been really excited to see you.

I'm tired bluebay and need a break, like lots of people, but thanks for asking ❤ Today is quiet here because we all need some calm and down time I think. One doing homework, one playing on my laptop and one crafting up a storm. I'm doing not a lot. My Middle kid and I made soap earlier for a homemade gift thingy our family do. That was kind of fun as I've never made soap before 🙂

Hugs backatchya @Shaz51 ❤😘

[Shaz51]

but I have a beautiful daughter and granddaughter who I love and support.--- @BlueBay  my sister , you sure do and to keep loving and supporting your children and grandchildren everyday xxx

[Shaz51]

@CheerBear, sit and try to relax xx

while your children are having their down time

[Owlunar]

Hi @BlueBay 

I can hear how exhausted you are and I am too right now actually - it has to be expected after we do something that causes us so much stress - 

We need to be kind to ourselves and treat ourselves kindly - do what we can about chores and stuff and rest whenever possible to catch up with ourselves - 

It's normal

About your mother - I get it - some people are totally unreasonable but here's a couple of points

Your mother is responsible for her behaviour - she will pay for it in the end - she is controlling as you said - and in time you have grown away from her which is right and proper

And I really feel it's far more important to think about what you do have and rejoice in your family. Wanting what is more than just something you don't have - more like something that isn't there - is wasteful of your precious time and energy and I do know how this hurts but it's your life - it was mine - and it will take time but try and push those thoughts away -

And you have little A in your life and your mother doesn't. What a plus that is for you

It will take time to get over your MIL's eventual death and the funeral - having those cramps and pains in your stomach indicates just how hard it all was for you 

But your husband and kids and A are very much in your life and what great kids they are!

Sending hugs plus

Dec

Fantastic hugs for free

[BlueBay]

Thsnkyou my beautiful friend @Owlunar @for the hugs. Hugging you back 🤗 

I know I'm the lucky one - I have a great relationship eith my three adult kids. I'm honest and supportive with them. Not line my mum. Always taking sides and then back stabbing you to the other siblings. 
yes I have a beautiful granddaughter and she knows I live her so much. There is a special love between grandparents and grandchildren. 
no - my mum never had that. She never once had my kids dkeep over when they were little. She never once took them fir a few hours or even an hour. Never ever. Does thst make me angry. It sure does. I used to see my friends be so close to their mums.  So much involvement. 
I'm going to spend so much time with my grandchildren.  Give more than what my mum and dad ever did. 
It's their loss. 
I wanted to ask you something @Owlunar and I have a feeling I kniw what you'll say!!

when I first spoke to my parents again two years ago she would ring every single day. You may remember.  Then when I was in hospital the same every day. The past few months she has stopped. I'm the one that is ringing her. I actually can't remember the last time she called. So I get sngry that she doesn't call me. I leave it fir a few days. Thdn I feel guilty so I call. It's a vicious cycle. 
I feel the past 10 days with MIL death and funeral she should call me and see how we are. No I've been ringing her. 
it really gets me angry. She doesn't know I'm not well or bedn in hospital  and I'm not going to tell her. 
I don't know how to stop feeling guilty. 
I know her reasoning will be - oh we're old our children should ring us. But what about me. I've had two weeks of hell and she just doesn't care. 

[Shaz51]

we love you and support you my sister @BlueBay 

you have your uncaring mum ( sorry darling )

aand i had my father who kept rejecting me until the day he died

[BlueBay]

I'm sorry you had a dad like thst sis @Shaz51 

hugs 🤗❤️

[BlueBay]

This mirning I'm very angry thst I want to self harm 

I am angry and can't forget 

I need to grab something 

[Gazza75]

@BlueBay, take some big breaths and maybe try and go for a walk. Listen to some music.  ❤️❤️❤️❤️🌻🌻🌻

[Maggie]

Grab a coffee somewhere if you can and would like to. @BlueBay 💙💙💙

@Gazza75  👋👋👋👋