SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD)

[soul]

You'll finish those drawers one day @Former-Member and then be able to fill them with your things, put nice stuff on top. Maybe a photo of Claypan. 

Yep, happy to report the lavender is alive and well. I don't have a very green thumb. 

Did plenty of walking today and went yoga tonight. Must update the yoga thread. 

Decluttering is a good thing to do. I don't have a lot of personal belongings anymore. The ex husband threw it all out when the house was sold and I was overseas at the time. Got my daughter to salvage a few bits and pieces. Even photos were thrown out. So my memories are all in my head. 

[Former-Member]

Look what I found stalking my birds today. Not on! She was so fixated on them that she didn't even acknowledge me trying to shew her out (I'm very allergic to cats) so took a photo before shutting that door on her. Naughty feline.  Saw her sitting outside the window drawling over the birds again about 8pm - cracks me up a bit. Guess not having Claypan dog around nowvhes gone too doesnt help.  Think I'll have to invest in a screen door for summer. 

SpookySpooky, Hey! 

I got Work in the morning so guess I need to try go to sleep. 

Thinking of you @Adge and hope you have a better night than last night 😴💤Aweful being sick by yourself. Just rest, survival mode for you forum bro, get well soon 💜🌷🌿🐦

[Owlunar]

I love your birds and your puddy-tat @Former-Member -really cool

And your puddy-tat has really neat eyes - aw - yes - I know it's the camera flash but still - it looks spooky and I think it's interesting

I am flying home this afternoon - just using the computer in the lobby of the hotel with my cab coming in about half an hour - great weather -

I hope you can get down here to see your oldies for Fathers Day and I hope your Dad can be in his Happy Place and your Mum is okay - I know it's tough for you down here and also - it can be hard to leave

I'm thinking of you -

Dec

[soul]

Naughty naughty kitty cat. Looks hungry too. Do you know who it belongs to? Must have heard them chirping @Former-Member and came to investigate. 

Your birds are so pretty. Do you know if you have males and females? So nice that you have company. 

Here the pooch is fast asleep after a morning walk and waking me through the night wanting to go outside.

[Adge]

Oh that cat is so naughty @Former-Member

My own cats used to stalk the birds in the aviaries (& even climb the aviaries & spook the birds), before I taught them not to.

It isn't even your cat, it's an invader!

Lovely pictures of your birds.

Adge

[Former-Member]

Yes, she's a very naughty cat neighbour. Maybe I should get a big dog, haha.

How ya feeling @AdgeAdge ? Wishing / praying you recover soon 💜🌿🐦

 I've been physically wrecked, more than usual, since dog died, emotional drain I guess. Have been pushing myself to do the 2 4.5hr shifts at the shop - its not physically hard work, not like housework feels, but I do tend to crash after, sometimes for a solid 12hrs.  

Nearly went for a walk this morning but realised the dog isn't here to take and I collapsed in a yeary heap, again. I dont cope well. Wish i had the drive i can see in so many of you inspirational souls here.

Still have a lot of pruning yo finish, taking forever this year, and its needs to be done for spring growth. Cleaned out the SE backyard corner yesterday, saw two small black snakes (apx 60cm), scared me. 

Not doing well today, still in PJs and didn't make group. Feeling self conscious with one of the ladies whose changed tone with me and I don't know why. Not sure if that's why I'm frozen today. Maybe triggered more than expected by sirens waking me roaring past at 1am. The thoughts they trigger are horrible. Never seen do many ambos since my girl died, everywhere, every time I go out the door. Logically I on w it just seems that way because I don't wanna see them. Still sicks

Really wanna visit my parents this weekend but given that none of them care if they see mr - bar one (who has spirit guides visit often, peeping tom next door, pot smoking friends and believes people are trying to k#ll him), i don't wanna feel tired and vulnerable around such people.

So yes, evil wins again, stifles Gods will for me & them. Also wiadom maybe in not throwing pearls among mockers only to be trodden in the mud - devalued to nothing, or worse. Its just this voice in the back of my head pushing me, telling me not to o be so weak, telling me to require more of myself, telling me to not give up on them...

Even my sane brother is rude - he sent me a tx Saturday that started with the words "I ask a know-it-all christian nurse..." It was about some issue with dads care. I reminded him what my name is and referred him to dads DVA case manager RN. I've come to the conclusion that some people see you how they want to see you - not how you are. Honestly font see how that serves them, must in some way.

What am I prattling on about? Sorry, feeling beside myself a bit today, out of body, fuzzy -  might grab a cuppa and come back🌷🌿🐦

[Adge]

Hi @Former-Member I know it's been really hard for you, especially with your lovely dog gone.

You do seem to have an amazing amount of drive (in you), to me. I think perhaps you underestimate yourself (I think we all do).

I haven't quite turned the corner yet (in recovering from Bronchitis), although Mum said that I sound a bit better (on the phone).

I had to be very pro-active & assertive in going to 3 Drs (& calling a locum Dr out twice), before I received adequate treatment (finally) & a 2nd course of stronger antibiotics.

Yes I should give that initial GP the sack, as you & several people said - he's the one who refused to give me any treatment.

I booked a 3 day yoga retreat for my holidays, I've never done one of those before.

I've not had the energy to book anything else yet - although I really want to do some short trips, like maybe a bus tour of the south west.

I've not had a trip away in years, & I've not had a 4 week break in over 6 years. I need it.

Although I've been worried that I would still be sick during my time off (break), as that's happened several times before.

Adge

[soul]

Be gentle with yourself @Former-Member. So today was a pj day. That's okay. Tomorrow is a whole new day. Plan to get just even one thing done. The yard work sounds like a big job. Watch out for those 🐍 🐍.

Still missing your canine friend. Walks aren't the same. Try to get moving. It willl be good for you.

Think about whether you want to make the effort this weekend. Talk to your birds. Even if they don't answer back, it might help you clarify things in your head. I do it all the time - talk to the pets that is.

[soul]

Yoga retreat sounds great @Adge. You'll come back feeling all refreshed and calm. About time you had a break. Even just the three days will make all the difference. Then when you come back start planning the next one so you have something to look forward to. 

[Adge]

Thanks @soul That sounds great.

I need to try new things, & to have things to look forward to during my break.

A yoga retreat is a bit of a stretch out of my comfort zone, but it seems worthwhile.

I've been doing twice weekly yoga classes for almost 6 years, but I've never done a yoga retreat before - in fact I've not been to any type of retreat in over 20 years...

Adge