A long rave

[Former-Member]

@eth 

Thanks thought ud gone to sleep. Im heading off now

[Sans911]

@Former-Member it takes to navigate these spaces here. You haven't necessarily done anything wrong. And there's a reason for the structure of different threads and areas. This is so that certain threads are kept light and more social whereas other threads are where we can share more of the deeper feelings, emotions and experiences. Someone was just trying to move you in a direction where you could continue that conversation, not to shut you up. Everything @Zoe7 has said is helpful and she is super kind and caring. Please keep sharing your stories and experiences as well as supporting others. It's a lot of benefit to others.

[eth]

Hi @Former-Member   I actually was asleep when you last posted to me last night - not sure which post of mine you were responding to Sorry.   I want to start by saying you are already a valued member of our community here, and what you share and the way you respond to others is always brave, open and honest, and very supportive and eloquent. I have seen what happened last night on Friday Feast and can feel your hurt and confusion.  Having said that, I totally agree with all that @Sans911  and @Zoe7  have written to you here.  It is hard to tell which threads work how at times it's true.   At the top of the page where it names the thread you are on just to the left of that you'll see which area you are in e.g. social spaces, somethings not right, our stories, looking after ourselves ... etc.  That gives a clue to what sort of posts and discussions you might find on any given thread within that 'board' - i.e. under that subtitle.  Occasionally a thread heads in a different direction from how it started and can be gently moved to another category by a moderator.  In this case what I see is that @outlander  quite gently and politely suggested that the conversation evolving could fit more appropriately in a different area.  Friday Feast is generally one of the light social threads as @Sans911  describes,  whereas here on the Long Rave thread it has always been ok for anyone to post in depth about what's going on for them.  If you go back to page 1 where it was started by Mazarita, you can see what she says in the introduction post.  Even this whole thread changed direction and was moved - from 'something's not right' to 'our stories'.   And in the same way if you go to the first page of Friday Feast you will see Nik Nik's opening post that describes the intention of the FF thread.  It used to always be started each week with a post from a @Former-Member  that would kick it off and give an idea of what sort of discussion might evolve.  More recently this hasn't been happening so it might be easier to be confused about what's going on there.

So there's 2 ways that you can suss out what's intended for the thread if you are confused.  It's quite possible that this issue isn't covered in enough detail in the guidelines you see when you first sign in, so I am tagging @Former-Member @Former-Member @s-jay and whoever is @Former-Member at the moment in case one of you is available to look into this and make helpful suggestions to @Former-Member   Thankyou.

[traveller]

Hi @eth , its Traveller here one of the Moderators....i will forward on to CM to follow up on Monday.

Cheers Traveller

[Former-Member]

@eth 

So does this come under our stories

Which ones r social threads ill just avoid them then

[eth]

@Former-Member  yes this one is in 'our stories' area.  I don't really get why you feel you need to avoid social threads but will respect your decision.  I'm hanging out on the Saturday Soiree thread I started and do every Saturday, which is one of the social threads.  You are absolutely welcome there if you change your mind xx

[eth]

Hey @Adge  I meant to get back to you sooner here.  I'm so sorry to hear about your experiences of abuse.  I think you've touched on it before.  Personally, on this thread I think it's quite ok to post any time, I don't think you were 'butting in'.  If you want to talk more about what you went through or how you've survived and show so much resilience I am here to listen.  Hope today is one of the better ones for you.  See you on the SS thread xx

[Owlunar]

Hi @Adge 

I agree - there are different forms of abuse - I really wouldn't want to try and sort out what could be worse than others - it does really damage people's lives and I read so much of it in the forum

For me it was my mother's psychological abuse. Years have passed since she died and I talked to my father's surviving brothers after she passed and went into my own memories and even went to Canberra to the War Memorial to find out about her father. She actually had a really sad life herself which maybe gave her reasons for her behaviour but I have never allowed it as excuses. After all - we all have our stuff to sort out.

But for my own sake I forgave her - I saw her die full of regrets and I do not want to spend the end of my life feeling miserable about my mistakes when the time comes

I seem to be more resilient than most and I also have my own voice and learned young to speak out. I learned not to argue with my mother - she was not an educated person and her opinions seemed strange to me - stupid even - some of her comments sting to this day

My son was adopted and that can be a rough start for some people - toward the end of his life he was involved with SA, SI and SH. I knew he would finally succeed as he did. He was so unhappy. His unhappiness came from within. Some people start from a bad place

I've got his 50th birthday coming up in a few weeks. It seems strange - he will always be a teenager

It seems I am having a long rave right now. I hope you are feeling okay today Adge and I am sending my best thoughts

Dec

[eth]

Love you @Owlunar   Stay strong xxx

[eth]

Hi all @Owlunar @Former-Member @Sans911 @greenpea @Adge @saturnzoon @Angels333 @Shaz51 @TAB @cutiepiekitty @Scarecrowe @MDT @Gazza75 @Exoplanet @Teej @Appleblossom @outlander @frog @octavia @Doglover @BlueBay @Ant7 @Maxi7  @CheerBear @Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope  @utopia @oceangirl @Jenn4  and anyone else passing here today -  hope today is kind to you all, peaceful and recharging.

Welcome also to @Brightfighter @Mezz @Woyapp @-pixie- @Kellogg @Serenity1 @Kermit @Got_the_tshirt @SalvadorDalek @Sissy78 @Ma60 @SnowWhite @Jadedragon   Hoping today is starting gently.  This is a thread that is sometimes pleasantly social but also a place where it's ok to rave in depth about what's going on for you. You will find friendly and supportive people here, and possibly others with common ground with you.

Tag me (or anyone else) by putting @eth  - type the @ symbol and a drop down menu will appear where you can either just click on the name or continue to type in another name you want to reach.

Looking forward to seeing each of you sometime soon.  Take care.