A Life of Trauma and Tragedy (Possibly Triggering Content)

[TAB]

Yes its All Stupid 🤷‍♂️ Lol xx

[Eve7]

Hi @Emelia8 

Ive finally caught up on your posts and must say you’ve made a tough decision but very much the right decision.

This time you need to think of you and focus on your wellbeing.

Thank you for all the support you’ve given me the past couple of days.

i really appreciate you.

💙💛💙

[WIP]

Dear @Emelia8 

I would just like to thank you so very much for being there for me over the weekend. You don't know how much you helped me, and I am so very grateful for your time, kindness and sound advice. I appreciate you very much. xx

[Former-Member]

💜🐶 @Emelia8 🐶💜

[Lee82]

Thank you for your update hun. I'm so sorry your trip to see your dad didn't pan out for you. I can imagine how frustrating you must feel but I feel from what you have said that you made the right decision. I hope it will be a trip you can make some time soon. For now looking after you is important and necessary. 
I'm sure your brother completely understands and agrees that it is a massive trip to try and do by yourself and staying home is the safest option. 

Anniversaries are really rough hun so I will be thinking of you babe and will hold your hand through it as best I can. I have just been through 2 of the hardest anniversaries for me and it was so damn hard. So I'm here for you hun.

 Take care of you babe. @Emelia8 

[Emelia8]

Hi @Owlunar ... just catching up with my posts .. yours was the last one that I never got completed 2 days ago.

Yes it was a hard decision not to make the long trek to see Dad.  I'm glad you got to see your Dad before he passed.  I hope I'm wrong in my feeling that Dad isnt going to be around much longer.  I talk to him on the phone every day, but it really isnt the same as being there in person.  But I just couldnt risk spreading it to him, nor could I risk getting COVID for myself either.

Oh yes, you are so right Dec ... I had not reckoned on this out of the blue cancer diagnosis.  I have had cancer all around me with loved ones, I guess I just never expected it to hit me too. 

I too am getting more and more worried about this COVID outbreak, in both NSW and VIC.  It is a big concern, and they dont seem to be getting it under control yet.  Each day results in more and more alerts for more and more locations .... it just keeps growing.  I really had thought we were through the worst of all this, with VIC having done so well with their second wave.  61 days without local transmission ... fantastic.  Given that its summer, and less likely for spread, I thought we were looking good through to our planned vaccination commencement in March.  Now, thanks to NSW ... things appear to be getting out of hand again.  😔

Ha ha, wise owl ... sorry you are having some bad feather days.  Have you organised a feather cut yet, or are you holding out in the hope that the virus situation improves first?  I'm lucky ... I have long hair and it just gets longer when I do nothing.  I have a light fringe, which I trim myself whenever it needs it.

Yes 29th Feb ... forever firmly imprinted in my memory. You're right ... this is not a leap year ... therefore no 29th. 👍  But it is an Olympic year ... with the 2020 Tokyo olympics having been deferred from last year.

Thank you for reading my updates Dec, I appreciate you watching over me, with your wise words and understanding.  But there is no obligation to respond and I get that its not easy when using the mobile phone. As and when you are able to respond, is great when it happens. 

I dont blame you at all for deferring any plans for interstate travel right now, or even within our own state for that matter.  Things are just so uncertain ... with rules, regulations, hotspots and borders changing daily.  I would hate to be in the tourism or travel industry right now .. they would be suffering so badly through all this.  And yeah, if forced into hotel quarantine ... it comes at a high monetary cost, let alone emotional.

Returning the love Dec.

Emelia 💞

[eth]

Dropping by with a hug and a  @Emelia8   So nice to see all the support you have here.  xoxo

[Emelia8]

Sorry @Bow for my slow response to your post to me 2 days ago.  Thanks for sitting with me ... and yes, those things definitely change us.  27yrs for you?  Only 25yrs for me.  I guess I have a way still to go then? 🤔  I'm so sorry that whatever happened to you 27 years ago ... happened at all. 💔  I wish I could take all of that away for you.

I'm thinking of you too Bow, and hoping you can continue to make some progress as you have recently done.  I know its incredibly hard, but you have so many wonderful reasons to push through.  Unlike myself.  😔

Emelia 💕

[Anastasia]

Dearest Em,

Back at work as you know so it has taken me a little longer to respond to your news. I know you understand but I am still sorry this is the case.

I am so sorry that you are not able to visit your dear Dad and other family members as planned, I know this would be extremely disappointing for you but necessary to postpone under the circumstances. Still not a nice decision to have to make and I am praying that come Feb/March that you might be able to visit then. I’m also sad to hear that his health has deteriorated, this would be concerning, oh Em, I don’t really have a lot of words today my brain is mush but I really am sorry from the bottom of my heart.

I am sure that your brother understands that you are just not able to assist prepare your Dad’s home for sale at the moment, I am sure when you can you will and he would know that. I can imagine it would be a big job and not one any of us ever want to or can prepare ourselves to do ☹

I think I recall your pdocs office reopens today? Are you able to call them to try to secure an appointment to get you back in the loop? I really hope so Em.

Oh such a horrid anniversary please know that I will be here for you as will all of your forum family. I am sorry that that happened to you, it actually breaksmy heart. So cruel and unnaceptable. I wish I had the power to change the past as I wish only for good things for you.

Love you to bits @Emelia8 - sorry I had to finish typing as I need to get away from my desk but I do hope that you understand what it is that I am tryong to convey xxx. 

[Emelia8]

Catching up with your post to me yesterday @Eve7 .

Yes Eve, not doing the visit was the correct decision ... I know that now.  Everything else aside, I really am not in a good place right now.  So it would have been a mistake all round to have gone. Supporting you is a pleasure Eve, or at least trying to support you is my pleasure. You are such a loveable person, its easy to care about you. I feel pretty useless a lot of the time, knowing I cannot help anyone.  So when people like yourself, WIP and Bow say that I have  helped in some small way, then I feel very happy about that.  Thank you for telling me.  And yes, I very much appreciate you too Eve ... you've been a lovely and loyal support to me over the months I have known you. 💞

@WIP ... thank you so much for telling me that.  As I just said to Eve ... there are times I feel dreadfully useless and it warms my heart to think that somehow I may have helped someone get through a particularly rough patch. So I very much appreciate you telling me that I make a difference.  Its important to me.  I was so proud of what you achieved at your appointment yesterday.  I realise you will be probably be feeling like you'd been hit by a sledge hammer today ... but thats understandable after the high emotions of yesterday.  I commend you for having this last apt with your soon to be former psychiatrist tomorrow.  To just cancel the appointment would have been the easy way out, and probably tempting.  But you dont take the easy path in life do you?  You do whats right.  Good on you. You have been seeing this psychiatrist for some time I gather, and he deserves to hear from you as to why you are turning elsewhere.  It is my understanding that it is a male pdoc?  You could possibly suggest that you would feel more comfortable with a female pdoc, and hence the change.  If that is the case of course, which I expect it could be a consideration at least.  It would likely enable him to not feel that his professional credibility was in question, thus saving face. Just a thought.  Anyway thank you WIP ... I appreciate you very much also.  Thank you for all the support you offer me in return. 🌹

Dear @Former-Member ... Such a difficult time for you right now.  I really hope your Son is doing better today.  I sure do feel for you in a big way. You must be feeling so heartbroken about what he has attempted to do, and about what has pushed him into this attempt.  I cannot even begin to imagine what he or you are going through.  Thank you for visiting me and sending your love, despite the difficulties you were going through, and still are, at the time.  Sending much love to you and prayors for your son. 💔

Dear @Lee82 .. I was getting worried about you, so was very relieved to finally see you around yesterday.  I realise you are off to QLD for a holiday soon.  I really hope it is a lovely time for all of you, and that you remain safe and well.  I agree that to delay my long drive to visit family was the right decision, and I realise that more each day.  My brother will understand, I know that. I also know that I feel guilty that so much always rests on his broad shoulders. I realise its because he is there, and I'm not.  Which is why I particularly wanted to get down there now.  Oh well.  Actually I just got word from him this afternoon that my nephew has come off his motor bike again last night.  He is in hospital awaiting surgery first thing in the morning.  He has broken his collarbone ... again. Was hoping it was just a fracture, but no .. its dislocated and needs surgery.  Not sure if they will put in more plates and screws.  Maybe just put one big plate across the whole collarbone now. The poor kid, he had only been back to work about 5 weeks and doing really well with his apprenticeship and recently got his truck licence. Now he is going to be out of action once again,  likely another 6 weeks.  This time, I dont know if his boss will keep his job open for him.  I just broke down and cried.  My poor brother deals with so much.  Do you think some people are just born unlucky?  Thank you Lee ... I am here for you too, please dont forget that. 😊

@eth thanks for dropping in with the hug and love.  Always love to see you around.  And yes ... I am incredibly lucky to have the support that I have here.  I count my blessings about that every single day.  The rest of my life might be falling down around my ears, but the support from my friends here keep me going.   I hope you continue to enjoy life in your new 'digs' and that you continue to do well.  Very proud of you, and encouraged by what you have managed to achieve over the last 6 months or so. 💓

@Anastasia  I see you posted while I was replying to my other posts. Snuck one under the radar 😄 Will get back to you later.

Emelia 💞