Trying to stay Sane

[rav3n]

oh @Anastasia we're here for you 💗

what are your thoughts on giving his a codename/fake name when talking to your friend? when me and my friends wanted to talk about someone without others recognising who, we'd give them a codename - for example, if we're talking about a guy named Josh, we'd instead talk about a girl named Sarah - and only me and her knew that Sarah = Josh. and maybe instead of the word cheating, you can have a codeword like eating? (e.g. Instead of saying Josh is probably cheating right now, we text Sarah's probably out eating right now) 

totally fair if you still find giving codenames a bit risky! hopefully you'll get some more opportunities to speak to your friend freely - and in the meantime, we're here to listen too!

[Emelia8]

Thats okay @Anastasia 

Like I said, it was a long time ago.

And its not about me now, its about you.

Yes I recall feeling all of those things you feel - betrayed at the top of the list, but very much up there too was broken, unwanted, empty, confused.  And for me, a strong feeling of not being good enough.  What did I do wrong, was I not good enough?  It really hurts, I know.

I don't know if its a matter of these people being cruel, or not.  I don't think that even comes into their thinking.  Its perhaps more a case of 'entitlement'?  I don't know.  Obviously I'm not in their head, so I cannot know.

I suppose you have to ask the question first ... are you absolutely sure that he is cheating on you?

For me, I was sure.  Because my husband had managed to pick up an STD and he had to notify me.  Told me I had to go to my Dr and get tested.  Thankfully I tested negative.  Which made him so angry.  I think he was hoping that I would test positive and then he could blame me.  But when I was negative, it could only be from him.  Anyway eventually the story came out that he had been having a fling with his overseas floozy every time he went over there on one of his boys trips.  This occurred for 4 weeks every 6 months while I stayed at home and worked, and ran the farm.  Silly me aye?

And yet he never did really accept the blame for that you know.  He would throw it up at me years later, that it was me who gave it to him.  Dont know how that works.  Especially when his little fling overseas also tested positive.  Anyway!!!  Not about me.  

Where was I?  Oh yes.  Are you absolutely sure he is cheating on you?  And if he is, have you given any thought yet as to what you may do about it?  Eg, work things out, or cut and run?  Any thoughts?  Perhaps its way too early at this stage.  Its a tough one I know.  But something you will need to start to think about.

I think its going to be a really rough weekend for you.  Are you working?  

[Anastasia]

Oh @Emelia8 that is a lot! I am so sorry 😔 

Yes thankfully I'm working both days. 

I'm cutting and running. I'll never get past this and yes I'm 100% certain. I will be doing my best to catch him red handed so to speak so he won't have a leg to stand on.

Wish me luck please 🥺 

[Anastasia]

I love this, thank you 😍 @rav3n 

[Emelia8]

Okay @Anastasia I can understand that.  I really hope you can catch him out red handed, then you'll know for sure. But please be careful. You may think you are completely safe. But you never expected that he would cheat on you either, did you? Promise me you will not take any unnecessary risks.

[Bow]

I’ve been busy all afternoon and my watch has been buzzing up with notifications and I’m so sad to finally sit down and read your news @Anastasia 

I am so sorry this has happened to you. 

My ex cheated on me. I was so devastated. I felt nauseous. I didn’t want it to be true, but it was so blatantly true it was right there in front of me. There was no him denying it…. Even though he tried. 

I havent had time to read all the replies, but please make sure you have support around you. You will need it. And make sure you take care of your precious self. 

[Anastasia]

Thank you my precious @Bow 

I feel so teary knowing you're still here. I have been absent forever and yet you and others still care. That is very special 😭🙏

[Anastasia]

You are so wise @Emelia8 

No i most certainly did not.

I hear you 🙏 thank you

[Bow]

Just stopping by to check in on you dear @Anastasia  i do hope that you are ok and safe and taking care of yourself 💕🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗🤗