The lies, secrets and cheating from my bpd partner are destroying me.

[Ali11]

We're glad to hear that you are seeing someone when you need to @Janey1, it's also good to have those tools in your pocket in case you need them. How has your week been?

[Bwishes]

Mmm ... i know what your saying. Well im not feeling that great tonight, my girlfriend is going through devaluation of me again and the last 3 days have been hellish. I have been accused of totally destroying her life when all i have done is try to help her, its just a matter of time now before she may connect with someone else. I know her behaviour is a pattern etched deep inside of her but the fact that she has chosen not to return to therapy i am now quedtioning our relationship.

[Janey1]

Im sorry to hear you are having a tough week..Its a constant rollercoaster isn't it? It's heartbreaking and exhausting when they treat you like this when all you do is try to love and support them and they keep pushing you away. Ive had a tough week as well and have found it hard to find motivation to keep myself busy. Hopefully next week will be better for both us. 

[Janey1]

I had a hard week last week, felt very low and spent a few days in bed because I had no motivation to do anything. I haven't been sleeping well because I cant stop the thoughts in my head and I feel very tired. Im hoping for a better week this week.

[Ali11]

Sorry to hear that @Janey1, hopefully, you will have a better week next week. 

[Bwishes]

Janey1 im sorry to hear that as well .. isnt it a horrible feeling .. they really open a person up emotionally dont they .. i went through it last year with her so this time now is number 4th or 5th time we have seperated . . So it has got a little easidr to deal with now. I feel so bad for you. My girlfriend has moved out of my place and gone to another town to stay with friends .. she is trying thought but told me on the phone the other night that she is going to procceed to seduce her ex there and she said for me yo let her go now and that she doesnt want to hurt me and told me that she will more than likely sleep with random men there. So i told her that was it and if she returns here she needs to get back into therapy or i wont communicate with her sorry. This time last week she was in my arms ..its not ideal is it.

[Janey1]

Oh that's heartbreaking...Im sorry your having to go through this for the 5th time, but you should be proud for being so strong and sticking to your boundaries. I hope I can be that strong one day!

[Bwishes]

Im not really that strong, shes been open and as honest with me as she could have been, i think this has helped somewhati dont think i would like to be lied to like you suspect you may have been. We havent talked since last week now and its starting to hit me a little, each time this happens i ground myself and go over the disorder again because you tend to lose sight of the pain they go through a little and i look at why i care for her so much, are we compatable, we were good work friends for two years before we started dating a year ago., each time either her or myself end up making contact again after two to four weeks, this time im unsure when or if we may reunite again, im okay though, its not healthy for us atm but at the same time i love her and care about her a lot.

[Janey1]

Thats great that you have an open honest relationship and can communicate effectively with each other. Im not communicating with my partner at all about how im feeling and it is very unhealthy because it consumes me.  Im just not ready to deal with the pain that I believe will inevitably follow. I hope the last few days have been ok for you and that brighter days are ahead. 

[Ali11]

Just checking in to see how your weekend was @Janey1.