Staying Safe

[Appleblossom]

Hello @WinterSun

I am very sorry to hear about your struggles with mental health issues in the family.  I have had to deal with that a lot too and often felt unsafe but normalised it to myself.  I am getting clearer on what is unreasonable late in life. 

An adult son may get angry in the car while driving or a passenger but interfering with your capacity as driver to have control of the vehicle is not on.

Keep faith with your right to have your needs met as well as the men in your life.

[Former-Member]

Hi @WinterSun
Quick check in
Darcy

[Former-Member]

Hey, sorry to hear what you are going though. I am not sure if your sonis over 18 what you can do, I believe the police can take him to hospital if he is a danger to himself or others but other then that I am not sure. *Hugs hope things are better.

[WinterSun]

Hi @Appleblossom

Thanks we have had a long and difficult time. It has made our relationship difficult, as this point in my life I don't feel like having to deal with it but as we know it's not a choice.

[WinterSun]

Hi @Former-Member

Thanks so much for checking on me. Son has mellowed and psych dr is currently tweaking meds. Poor kid is on four different meds. Motivation has been a huge issue but this week was doing a work trial and will be do a training day for another job next week and begins work the next day. The structure has been good and helped so fingers crossed it continues.

Hard  trying to get him to "work" on the reasons he has these issues and what stresses set him off. He is sick of drs and reluctant about meds but at this point compliant.

How long was the process with your husband? How did you survive the stress of it all?

WinterSun

[WinterSun]

@Former-Member

Thanks for your kind thoughts. It's been a difficult time and we are better armed with information and direction since our last issue. If required I would enlist the help of police especially if on my own.

[Former-Member]

@WinterSun
My husband has had a long struggle, he was unwell for a good 8 years before his major, probably psychotic crisis which lasted 2 years ending with an attempt, he was in hospital for some time recovering from physical injuries as well as getting mentally stable. It was toward the end of his hospitalisation that he was put on a mood stabiliser which made a heap of difference and since then he has been tapered off 2 of the 4 drugs he was on. I am not a fan of polypharmacy and made it my business to learn about the drugs, their side effects and interactions and was not afraid to ask questions, particularly after I realised he had significant adverse events from being on different classes of drugs. He still has a lot if anxiety - coming to terms with his attempt has proven difficult - am not sure how well he is engaging with therapy.
As he was in crisis for so long his brain suffered a major assault and recovery from the acute episode is a long slow process.

How did I survive? Early on I was oblivious to his MI and was embarrassed or exasperated by his behaviour. Once crisis hit I guess adrenaline kicked in. After the attempt I looked things up and learned so much. I learned that his attempt was a symptom of a serious mental illness that is potentially terminal by way of self harm if not treated adequately. I learned about expressed emotion and how to manage this. I made a choice that I would willingly and lovingly support my husband; I do not judge others and the choices they make as I understand how difficult it can be so no indictment of anyone here.

[WinterSun]

@Former-Member

In the early years I felt the same frustrated and embarrassed by my husband and not understanding where the person I knew had gone. It was a year after hospital that I felt I could see the person I knew.
I found a good resource in a book Loving Someone with Bipolar which focuses on partner relationships.

WinterSun

[Former-Member]

Thanks @WinterSun
Will look up the book.

[WinterSun]

Loving Someone With Bipolar Disorder
Julie A Fast