Topic Tuesday // BPD Awareness featuring SPECTRUM VIC // Tues 1 Oct, 7pm AEST

[BlueBay]

@Former-Member 

That’s great that you can do this weekly. It was really expensive. 

Good thst you’ve got a dva card. That’s a huge help. I hope you continue to get great results. 

It just adds up / to see a psychiatrist for meds then a psychologist for therapy. 

[Former-Member]

@outlander 

Thanks. Its just the way it is.

No family has possibly made me see life very different & im sure made me stronger.

Sometimes i still struggle being around people cause they all have families & i dont. Possibly why i dont get close to people or struggle too

I left home at 17 & that was that.  Life went very bad. Incredible low self worth issues from having no family tho. So then u have no friends no boyfriend etc. No reasons to live. 

Destroyed my life totally. People often ask what kept me going. I dont know looking back. Many times i moved towns after trauma. So i think starting afresh in a new town gave me hope. Music & exercise were a huge help. Maybe being a very independant person by nature too helped.

Certainly people didnt keep me alive at all. They always upset me actually. At my lowest point off meds almost everyone triggered me off so i stayed on my own. 

Boy did i get poor. One point i struggled to buy a shirt from op shop for $2. Such low self worth. Couldnt work cause i couldnt b around people 

I think having my son turned my life around totally. No1 wanted me to have him tho. So i had no support. What a hard pregnancy. I really struggled to sleep & eat.i got so weak could hardly get off the bed.

I really think i would have died if i didnt have him at 40. True id taken that much abuse i just didnt have the strength to go forward.

So having someone love u from the start i believe is everything. 

[Former-Member]

@BlueBay 

Its very sad its not available for everyone.

Ive had crappy 10 sessions all my life that did nothing totally useless they were.

I couldnt even get a psychiatrist.

Staying away from people & living like a hermit was my self therapy for most of my adult life.

A blessing in disguise fact my mental health cracked after i moved cause it kicked started me to get help & the card.

Took a few mnths to get it sorted but i get a private psychiatrist end nov now & psychologist wants me to stay seeing him for as long as needed.

Finally in good hands.

Ive also found another psychologist that does dbt so ill see her later.

[outlander]

that is really tough @Former-Member being loved and care for is a big help indeed. it sounds like you've done a really good job raising your son and given him a good start to life

[Former-Member]

@outlander 

Thanks

He appears to be doing so well. Hes not really making friends quickly since we moved but seems to have his head very grounded & clear.

Decided hes doing highsch & wants to go to uni also.

Hes very determined & independant. 

It doesnt appear to have affected him fact hes only got me in this country.

Dad lives in another country. He doesnt like him & thats that. 

He talks to dad on ph his dad visit s every few yrs. 

Ive pushed for all that connection just in case i did die.

Certainly nothing like the family i grew up in tho.

He does his thing & i do mine. We dont argue.

I do worry that he has no other support tho but for now it doesnt appear to bother him.

So im hoping my love & safety was all he needed

[outlander]

@Former-Member youve done a good job with him. I think when we have mh issues ourselves one of our biggest fears is that our kids or someone else close to us will get a mh issue so we try our best to reduce those chances

[Former-Member]

@outlander 

Yeah i was so worried about this.

Unfortunately i came across a nasty sch teacher in primary sch that assumed this but his highsch teachers have all praised me & said im doing a great job as they all enjoy teaching him.

I did have a lot of problem with primary sch teacher in the beginning tho. They were triggering me off & questioning why we had no family. 

It made it really stressful+ they found out i had mi so they judged very harshly

They were wrong tho

Hes nothing like how my bros turned out

Doesnt even drink tea or coffee lol 

[outlander]

That is unfortunate @Former-Member some schools and people are judgemental and lack understanding but im glad the high school is better and son is going well there.

[Former-Member]

@outlander 

A lot of primary teachers bully u for being a single mum too. Bit sad. I didnt expect it cause i was 40!  

A big difference.

So r they having anymore group sessions on bpd this week?

I was late jumping in as i went to aqua class.

Missed the first questions

[Former-Member]

@Angels333 

So sorry its so hard for you now.

Im finding my latest meds really helps to lessen self harm.

Its a slow recovery thats for sure.

No wonder everyone got me cause you all have bpd too.

Its so misunderstood.

Each day is another day.

Go slowly & stay in touch with people u resonate with so u dont withdraw too much