Topic Tuesday // Tools for Advocacy // Tues 19th October, 7:00-8:30PM AEST

[Former-Member]

I love your point about 'being clear on your goal' @Daisydreamer 

When i was doing advocacy with one organsiation we did an activity to find our 'why' before every engagement. We would get asked 'why' we wanted to do something. And we might give an answer like 'to make a difference' then they would ask 'why' again. And again and again. Maybe five or 6 times. And in the end you would have a far deeper motivation like 'because all people have the right to a good life' and it always really helped me connect to what I was doing.

[Daisydreamer]

Hi @Anastasia,

That's a really great question! From my experience supporting a loved one, I really had to know my rights and theirs to ensure, and make that really clear in my advocacy to ensure there wasn't repurcussions. Finding the right person in the service or pathways to advocate made a difference (eg: patient liason officers, or head of a treating team).  There are also services to support you, such as advocacy services who can advocate on your son's behalf and are often given a lot of weight to their words. 

We will also be talking about skills to empower loved ones to self advocate (our next question in fact) which might be really helpful for you. 

[Anastasia]

Yes @BPDSurvivor I couldn't agree more, I just wanted to acknowledge what you did was a wonderful thing. Our ultimate goal is for positive change. There is so much needed out there. 

[Shaz51]

Love your pointers @Daisydreamer 

Where can we go forward to help others more @Former-Member , @cloudcore 

[Anastasia]

Thank you @Daisydreamer 

[Shaz51]

Learning more to help my husband @Daisydreamer  to be able to help him And other family members 

[Former-Member]

Supporting a loved one to advocate can be tricky @Anastasia. @Shaz51 Sometimes what we may think is best for them may not always align with what they think is best for them.

I always have my partner or a support worker come with me to important things where I need support. And we have a bit of a game plan meeting before hand about what I would like covered and I also communicate with them signs I may be struggling and would need them to chime in. It might be a gesture or a word that lets them know I need them to step in. 

Hope that helps 🙂

[chibam]

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@Daisydreamer wrote:

1. It’s all about communication: How we communicate our needs and wants to others makes a difference. This is where knowing effective communication styles is important. How we deliver the message, for example being mindful of how we express emotion, can mean the difference in how your message is received.

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This is such a huge stmbling block for me! I'd love to hear more about how to communicate effectively!

Particularly when it comes to trying to express a "crazy" mindset to someone with a "normal" mindset. For instance, I find it immensely difficult in trying to clarify for people why I don't considder death to be the worst thing in the world, and why I have higher priorities than self-preservation, financial security, physical safety, and why I considder suicide to be an acceptable alternative to many other fates that others would be prepared to live with.

Most people considder this mindset to be irrational madness; (TBH, I feel the same way about thier  mindset) so I'd love to know howwe can effectively communicate with one another, and demonstrate the rationalities of our points of view to each other.

[Shaz51]

@Former-Member  I think it is because every situation  is different  but similar xx 

[Daisydreamer]

@chibam, that's a really good question. When there isn't family or friends that we feel we can turn to, there are other options you can access. Previously I have turned to helplines or forums for advice. I distinctly remember calling Relationships Australia a while back when I had to self advocate with loved ones, and it was really helpful to talk it through with a neutral party. 

Everyone is different, so it depends on where you feel comfortable to reach out to. The forums can be a great support and opportunity to talk through how you might advocate with services, the SANE Helpline, or advocacy services.