Coping strategies for grief

[Nashagirl75]

Hi all first time posting but I suffer daily with 

#Agoraphobia

#Asthma

#Body Dismorphia

#Bladder Prolapse

#Bipolar Effective Disorder

#Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder

#Carpel Tunnel both hands

#Chronic Back Pain

#Diverticulitis Disease

#Depressive Anxiety Disorder

#Daily Tension Headaches

#High Cholesterol

#Knee Cartilage Damage in both knees

#Major Depression

#Major Anxiety

#Migraine sufferer

#Panic Attack Sufferer

#High Cholesterol 

Day and Night Medicated I'm a mother to 3 amazing kidults(24,23,19) and have been with my husband for 26 years 

Anyway I have no support from any other family and in April Easter weekend we lost our eldest son in a tragic car accident he lived in Adelaide we live in Qld had not seen him for 3 years only to bring him home to Qld I want some coping strategies to deal with it we are all grieving differently but as his mum I can't cope daily I have left my house 5 times since his passing,I constantly think of him I'm devastated 5 weeks after he passed my father passed away in New Zealand I hadn't seen my dad for over 33 years my mother is a horrible narcissist person and I don't want anything to do with her,I have one sibling and I also have no contact with my choices I have been abused from supposed friends and family who I no talk to either our boy turns 25 on December 27th we got married on his first birthday and the next day is my hubby's Birthday

My constant crying, remembering everything about him from birth to death and also not having his daily calls or photos the overthinking  is not doing me any good I'm not even thinking about Christmas alot of people said that they are there for me but no that's alot of lies everyone seems to think I'm looking for sympathy and I'm crazy but that's not true at all I'm not having disrespectful friends or family in my life who only wanted to be nosey about his death it was on television all on the internet and I've seen and read alot of disrespect not just to me or our family but to my son as well 

I had a siezure as well at the end of September 

I understand I can't bring him back I understand people grieve different but what can I do learn how to cope with it all any help or information will be greatly appreciated thanks have a great day

[Shaz51]

hello and welcome @Nashagirl75 

letting you know that you are not alone my friend 

there is other threads to click on too like Coping Toolbox ( what is in yours to help you cope ) 

Carers Hints and tips to Success 

and i will tag you to Grief and Loss with @Zoe7 , @Owlunar , @Emelia8 

[Nashagirl75]

Thank you very much

[Owlunar]

Hi @Nashagirl75 

I really understand what you are going through - briefly about me - my son died 35 years ago, my parents have already passed the my siblings are toxic and I have nothing to do with them to protect myself

It's not long since your son died - and then his father - which is super-tough. I don't know any tips for getting over it - it's something we have to go through to get to the other side. That other side is there - just hard to get to and it takes time

The death of my son is the hardest thing I have had to deal with through a tough life - your grief-work will be hard and harder still when you don't have the support of family. Of course you think about your son all the time - I do know - I am thinking of you

It's important to care for yourself - eat nourishing food and get plenty of rest - these are basic - and try and establish some kind of routine - as simple as this might be

Also - it's important to see a counsellor - I think you have one -

I am sorry you are going through this - bereavement parenthood is a club no one wants to join and truly - we really don't want anyone else know. - Why would we?

Also - I don't know where you are but you may be able to access the Compassionate Friends - the Bereaved Parents Association. You will find them on line and by now probably able to email with other bereaved parents

Some of us in this site are bereaved parents - we can be here for you - you are not alone as terribly alone as you feel

My love and care

Dec

[Paperdaisy]

I can't even begin to imagine the devastation @Nashagirl75 and I'm really lost for words. I feel your pain and I can see December is going to be an even more difficult month for you. 

I wonder if you could talk to someone from griefline for some strategies? Here is the link https://griefline.org.au/ .

Please take care 💝