Re:

[Maggie]

I understand you want to be aware of the kids @Lee82 . A heat pack can be a bit of comfort, or something to hang on to.

Will you have the kids all day today?

[Lee82]

No just till about 11. Then I'll take them home. 
@Maggie 

The thoughts in my head won't stop. They are driving me crazy 

[Maggie]

Is there anything you can do that helps with the thoughts. @Lee82  ?

Call me crazy if you like, but sometimes I watch the stars, the night clouds, the colour and movement. I walk on the grass, just to get a kind of connection thing.

I have an overactive mind, so chaos is often happening.

[Lee82]

To be honest @Maggie I don't know what works anymore and I'm just so tired of trying and fighting to find out. 

[Maggie]

Yea, I get that. @Lee82 . I’m not sure one thing fits, it’s a combination, and sometimes it’s nothing. Just nothing works. You sound tired of it all. It can’t be easy coping with family on top of your own struggles.

Do you have anyone to talk to irl.?

[Lee82]

No I don't have anyone except my psychologist. Pretty lonely here irl 

@Maggie  husband left and my family don't know much about my MH. 

[Maggie]

My husband left also, but a long time ago now. @Lee82 .:I have a counsellor, but she is the only one I talk to about MH. To be honest, when I try, I feel like I’m talking in another language. I guess unless you’ve been there/ here, you just don’t know. But is it really that hard to get ?

[Lee82]

I know exactly what you mean. Everyone just thinks it's something you can control you can get over or stop. Something you can forget about. They don't understand the daily torture and torment. The daily struggle. The daily triggers and FB 

@Maggie  how tiring it all is and how debilitating it is. It consumes every thought every movement every action 

[Maggie]

I know. @Lee82 . I guess it comes down to choice. Choosing what you want to hear. Also fear. If they can’t fix it ( you/me) , it feel helpless to them, leaving us feeling hopeless. But we aren’t hopeless, a but complicated.

My eyes are seeing double @Lee82 , I’m going to log off for a while.

Hope to catch up later. 💙💙💙

[Lee82]

No worries @Maggie 

thanks for the chat and company 💗

hope you can get some rest