I can’t cope

[Captain24]

I have achieved a lot @Snowie. I am so much better than when I went in. I know it’s not the end of my recovery, I just didn’t think that I’d feel so low so soon. 

The nurse would probably say to sit with it. Work out what is beneath the mood, where it is coming from and use some of the skills that I’ve learnt like breathing and mindfulness. I should just listen to myself! 😜 

I want to get the paperwork in order while it’s still fresh and follow through with it in my own time. 

He gets his stitches out next Wednesday but the fine is pretty useless because he is so long with such long legs he can reach where he had his hind dew claws cut it. I can’t get a bigger cone cause his neck is so tiny! It’s the smallest one on the smallest holes! 

[Snowie]

It sounds like you have all the right tools to deal with it @Captain24 

However, I know how hard it can be at times. We are here with you through all of this.

I hope you can get the paperwork done in your time. At least it will then be done.

Well hopefully after his stitches are out then he doesn't need it anymore. It does look big on him!! I'm sure he is over it too.

[Captain24]

I had a great dietitian appointment. She talked me through my mood. She said it was normal to feel like taking a step backwards. She likened it to having an amazing holiday to come home deflated that it was over.

We spent probably 10 minutes on my eating at the end. She works more on the holistic approach. She asked what the 3 best things were in there. I said connection, support and learning. So I need to research things to learn so it gives me purpose. 

I also just talked to one of the girls I was in with. She is struggling really badly but she said talking to me picked her up. So I guess that was my connection (outside of here) and purpose for the day. 

I do have some good qualities. 

[Captain24]

The one connection I really wanted didn’t happen. My best friend went back to Melbourne and we didn’t get to catch up. Such is life I guess. 

Today is all too much. It feels like it’s been a big day. Time for a nap I think. 

[Captain24]

So much for a nap. The neighbours kept making a noise so Pix kept barking at them. 

[Jynx]

A rollercoaster this afternoon for you hey @Captain24 

It sucks missing out on valuable nap time! What will you do with yourself now? I sometimes find I need to deal with frustration before I can try napping again, how bout you?

[Captain24]

I’m just cooking dinner @Jynx. Then I’ll take my meds and just sleep the rest of the fay away. I just wish I could lift this flat mood. 

[Jynx]

@Captain24 For me, sometimes the best thing I can do with flat/low mood is to just say 'Huh, guess I'm feeling pretty meh today. I will adjust accordingly'. Cos if I try to change it or get mad at myself for feeling that way, it often snowballs and gets worse. I reckon meds + sleep it away is a perfectly legit thing to do, and kinda exactly what I meant haha. 

Should I refrain from tagging you further or you wanna chat a bit before meds kick in? 

[Captain24]

It did feel good though when my dietitian said it was normal to feel this way @Jynx. I hope she is right. I see my CM tomorrow and I don’t want to let her down. 

Tomorrow is a new day. I can start again. Maybe I will be more settled in. 

Im just waiting for my veggies to cook so I’ll be around for a little while. 

[Jynx]

@Captain24 I doubt there's anything much you could do that would let your CM down hun. What about yourself? Maybe you are the person you wanna be striving not to let down. And also, knowing at the same time that sometimes we do - let ourselves down, let others down, it happens all the time, cos we're human. 

Got much on tomorrow?