Cancer took my husband of 40 years. Not coping.

[Starta]

@Former-Member

My family all live around a 9 hour drive, we have only been here a little while no friends i are isolated no neighbours or friends, my anxiety keeps me talking to people. My hobbies were hubby's hobbies we done everything together, I have 2 little dogs. I love them but they are annoying me lately.. I don't want life to go on without him. I miss him too much..

[Starta]

@Former-Member 

Please don't worry I'm safe from me.

[Former-Member]

@Starta, well it sounds like some new hobbies and interests are on the cards then.  

In the meantime can I suggest you have a look at some of the threads in the Social Spaces are of the Forums here.  There really is something for everyone, eg art, craft, dogs, cats ... you name it. Please feel free to jump in and start posting to any of them.  You will be most welcome.

I will also tag a couple of my oldest friends here on Sane.  They are Community Guides and will be better able to suggest other threads to you and to tag other people who may be able to help you more.  @Faith-and-Hope and @Shaz51.

I too have a little dog btw.  She is in my profile picture.  She's a mini foxie x chihuahau by the name of Holly.  She's a true delight.  What breed are your two dogs?

Sherry

[Starta]

@Former-Member

My two are Maltese x .

Sorry just not good atm. Feeling really sad.

[Starta]

@Former-Member

I don't know how to do this by myself. I don't think I want to.

[Former-Member]

I understand @Starta, but it wont always be this bad.  

Are your two Maltese Crosses inside dogs?  If so, give them both a cuddle and inhale their scent.  It's meant to release feel good hormones.  Worth a try ... right?

I'm sorry I cant stay up with you any longer Starta, but I need to get to bed now. I have an early start in the morning, when I need to get hubby up to the hospital first thing for a check up with the oncologist. He saw him yesterday too, and again next Tuesday.  Not great, but fairly typical with this immunotherapy treatment he's having.

I bid you good night, and I really hope you manage to get a bit of restful sleep. Dream sweet loving dreams of your hubby. He will want you to be happy and safe.  Do you have religious beliefs at all? Personally I'm not religious, but I very much admire those who are and the faith they have.  Its very helpful for many people.  Sometimes I wish I had some of that faith too.

Just wondering if you have seen your GP since your husband's passing?  I note you havent been where you are for all that long, so perhaps you dont even have a GP yet.  I really think it would be helpful to pay him/her a visit however.  Just to talk things over.  And they will also be able to advise of any local support groups which you might find beneficial as well.  Meet some new people, take up some new hobbies, all that sort of things helps.

I hope I'm not sounding condescending here, it certainly isnt my intention.  I know you are hurting, and I know I cant take that hurt away.  But its up to you to find a way through it, and there is help out there to help you.  You just need to have the strength to ask for help and to take it when offered.

Good night dear lady.

Sherry xx

[lola]

Hi Starta
lola here one of the moderators.
So sorry to hear you are having a rough time. So good that @Former-Member sat with you tonight. I too am here and then @KobeCat will take over and be here for you.
take care
lola

[Starta]

@lola

Thank you very much. I will try to sleep now. I can't sleep in bed, that's where I nursed my hubby, been sleeping on the lounge when I get to sleep. 

Just want to say how much I appreciate everyone's company and advise, you're all amazing people Thank you very much, I'm sorry if I was a nuisance.  Good night.

[lola]

Hi Starta
You are not a nuisance!
We are happy to 'sit' with you through this time. Hope you get a good sleep.
Good night
lola

[Former-Member]

Good morning @Starta

Popping in to say hello and to let you know I am thinking of you. Sitting with you 🤗💕