The Weekly Friday Feast

[CherryBomb]

Hi @Mazarita

Starting a new job is anxiety provoking. I remember when I first started this job (which doesn't feel like 'work' for me). I experienced a lot of anxiety around performance, and fitting in. Not to mention that it was so tiring.

It's stressful, but it's normal while you find your place and stride. It usually gets better. I hope your next shift is easier.

[Shaz51]

hi @CherryBomb, I think i will be here for just a little while , feeling tired tonight , and hubby wants to get up early to go bush walking with our brother inlaw

[Jacques]

Yes it is very nice, a massive shed by todays standards. 

I really don't know @CherryBomb, i have not been out the shed of a night in years, i have not been out of the house of a night in years.

yes, i try to rest as much as possible, but it is hard to fight the emotions and thoughts, especially when i am fighting everyday.

[Shaz51]

I hope your next shift is easier for you @Mazarita

and i agree @CherryBomb, but my hubby still has anxiety and panic attacks doing the jobs we do

[Mazarita]

Thanks @Shaz51. I hope you, your husband and brother in law have a wonderful time bushwalking tomorrow. I imagine your husband will be taking his camera. Maybe we could see some of the shots if he takes some. The first ones you posted are really lovely. Hugs for you both. 

[Shaz51]

Thanks @Mazarita, but I am not going bush walking

I am having the day with my two sister in laws and mother inlaw tomorrow -- Ladies day out -- have not been on one for sooo long , feels a bit funny but i will be ok

[Mazarita]

@Jacques, I am sending you more hugs for the struggles you are going through daily at the moment. I see you as couragious in the face of your circumstances. I am grateful for your presence with us. I hope you feel better very soon. Move towards any, even subtle, impulse for creative acts and positive steps if you can, when it arises. Be kind to yourself in small ways wherever possible. These small, life affirming things seem to build momentum. Hugs again.

[Jacques]

Oh @Mazarita, you are so sweet, thank you my friend. 

i feel like a failure, but i try to and mum keeps tellign me i have achieved so much, i just need to find a way to beleive it. 

i feel guilty i have not reached out to you @Mazarita, @PeppiPatty and @Appleblossom enough. you are all so wonderful to me, i just fear i am goign to say something wrong and lose you as friends. as you may know i have a fear of abandonment. 

i am trying, i am thinking of getting back into my hobby of boat building, try to rebuild my self-worth and self-esteem

[Mazarita]

@Jacques, please never feel guilty over me. You have been nothing but kind. I understand the difficulties you go through and relate to a fear of abandonment too, though perhaps not as sensitively as you feel it. In any case it's part of friendship to be as forgiving as possible of each other's human frailties I think, and that includes any mistakes in communication. As for success and failure, I seem to be finding that they mean less and less in life. It's a peaceful perception. Having said that, I do hope you get back to the boat building. Such an extraordinary practice of mindfulness that must be. And a very worthwhile occupation. As you say, there is no doubt it would help with self-esteem and self-worth.

[CherryBomb]

Goodnight everyone!

Was a pleasure spending the night with you.