Best Friends Club

[Gremlin24]

@Jynx it was yummy but unfortunately for me it didn't stay down cos of all the stress 😞.

Yeah it is. I used to watch full house as a kid and I still enjoy watching it now. 

[Gremlin24]

@rav3n can't really tell myself that I am safe when I'm really not. Unfortunately I wasn't able to even keep my food down. I've really just had enough of all the pain and drama that's my life. 

[rav3n]

i'm so sorry you're dealing with so much emotional pain @Gremlin24 i know its a lot to deal with, especially on your own. do you think its time to reach out to a crisis service? we can keep you company on the forums while you wait as well. let us know how we can support you 💙

[Gremlin24]

@rav3n nah i don't need that at the moment. I'm just frustrated cos I've been trying so hard today to force myself to be positive and not be so depressed. But I just can't change how I feel no matter what I do. 

[rav3n]

trying to be positive must've been so exhausting @Gremlin24 it's okay to let that mask slip off. you don't have to pretend to be positive here, sometimes life's great, sometimes it's okay and sometimes it absolutely sucks. but we can still keep moving forward whether it sucks or not, even if its minute by minute. i can see you're trying your best to move forward and that's what matters most 💙

[WizardMotor]

@rav3n no, actually I despise gardening but I have a big back yard and I'm just trying to remove some of the plants and I want to replace this particular garden area with low maintenance pebbles and make it all zen, with a buddha statue.

I'm also not much of a "handy man" so doing something like this is totally unlike me, but so far it's going well and I should be finished on Thursday/Friday. 

[Gremlin24]

@rav3n but I'm sick of being like this. Being negative all the time is part of the reason that I have no friends cos noone wants to be around me. But even when I pretend to be OK people still don't want to be around me. I'm sick of living minute by minute and just barely getting by. I have so much built up inside of me and I can't even let it out. 

[rav3n]

@WizardMotor ahh i see! i'm not a fan of gardening either... mainly because i'm not a fan of bugs and i'm terrible at keeping even indoor plants alive. i like this zen vibe you're going for, sounds like a cool project!! good on you for getting out of your comfort zone!! would love to see the finished product once your done (if you feel comfy sharing) 😊

[rav3n]

@Gremlin24 i hear your frustrations and pain, i really wish i could take that all away from you and make things easier. 

you deserve a place to vent out and release all those negative emotions. whether that's writing it out, listening to sad songs/watching sad movies and crying it out, venting to crisis services/professionals, etc. is there one that works for you or one that you'd like to try?

one of my fav tv shows had this quote about recovery:

i know it might be hard to see right now, but you are making more progress than you think. when it gets too much, you are allowed to take a break. take a moment to breathe, to scream, to cry, whatever works for you. we're here. 

[PeppyPatti]

Dear @WizardMotor 

I had my stomach sleeved bm

at my older age there is just too confronting to deal with my large tummy and taking medication which makes gaining weight easy.