A Poem? Maybe?

[kato]

@peace 

Thank you for your kind words, i am humbled.

I always find myself writing and deleting posts, so often, because if i read them and i don't think they are worthwhile, they get deleted, i delete alot of posts, lol usually to do with me and my own stuff, i am glad that in some way shape or form, my posts are maybe helping you a little.

I know that everyone's posts to me always help, they can bring a brightness to a glum mood, they can make us smile, they can encourage us or remind us of the strength that we don't realise that we have.

Strength, hope, Knowledge

A burden shared is a burden halved

if lacking knowledge, hope is there

if lacking hope, strength is there

if lacking strength, knowledge is there

In each other strength, knowledge and hope is always found

A kind word, a simple gesture, a knowing comment

we may not expierence the same things

but with our differences comes, understanding

and with understanding comes,

hope, strength, knowledge

Thank you

[Loopy]

justanother47yr,

Would you like to hear a secret,
Something I'll bet you never knew,
A secret deep inside me,
I've been hiding it from you.

Do you see this smile,
So huge upon my face,
My eyes are big and sparkling,
Everything seems in its place.

I'll bet you didn't know,
As I close my bedroom door,
There's something I've been hiding,
I let out as I fall to the floor.

You can't hear my silent sobs,
Or see the mess I make,
You don't know the things I do,
When I don't have to be fake.

The secret I've been hiding,
The one that I hide best,
I never wanted you to worry,
Mother, I'm horribly depressed.

loopy.

[kristin]

hey @kato 

I'm glad you like the poem.  I wrote after I left my ECASA appointment. This is what happened when I did their TACT course in 2013. Usually I write a poem occasionally, but when I'm doing a lot of intensive work and processing they just pour out of me. (Sound familiar?)

That is such good news. Well done you for talking that through with your psych, and then pushing past the anxiety to do things you wanted to. I'm so glad your friend showed himself to be one! You deserve good friends. Being a good person is not about being perfect, we all stuff up - sometimes really badly. In my humble opinon it is what we do about it when we do stuff up - do we face up & fess up, or do we hide & pretend otherwise or get defensive? You are so open-heartedly blunt about your own shortcomings - I don't think you see what a rare trait this is.

So what film did you see?

Hope for growth, even in the midst of anxiety, endures...

Kindest regards,

Kristin

[kato]

Hi @kristin 

I have always had some semblance of peotry in me, i usually, don't express myself at all, let alone share my thoughts and feelings for others to see, or read........ It certainly sounds familiar, the words, just come to me when i am struggling/processing things i can't comprehend.

I must admit, if i stuff up i have always "owned" my mistake, whether, it was work related or about myself as a person, i am aware that i am far too hard on myself, and don't give myself the courtesy of hindsight or any leeway as to my actions. Which as you say is a rare trait, it is this trait that my friend saw, which if i wasn't displaying he would have been a different reaction, one perhaps not so friendly, but he has known me for a long time, and i him, and he has known my ex for same amount of time, he is being very impartial, and has made it clear he is not in the middle he is there for us both.

The movie i saw was the Hobbit battle of five armies........ it was not as good as i thought it might be, but it was to be expected being it is the tie between the lord of the rings and the hobbit movies, so there were no real surprises, it was a little bit obvious what was going to happen.

[Alessandra1992]

Hey @kato, I found The Hobbit disappointing too! Number Two had us all on the edge of our seats wanting the movie not to end, and then this one...letdown!
It is great to read that you are reaching out to friends, and being wise with not contacting a few for the time being..what I think is really huge is going to the movies on your own! Good one!
Noe funnily enough I went to see "into the woods", which is a musical mashed up fairy tale, red riding hood, jack and the beanstalk, Rapunzel..anyway I loved it! So much more fun (although dark in theme) than The Hobbit..but not a movie if you don't like musicals..
Keep up your great posts @kato, I always live reading them!!

[SCORPION]

So deep and dark that other place

So full of dread I fear to tread

But sleep I know ihave to face

I sit and read or just pace

Ill do anything to aviod its embrace

Then my eyes begin to shut

I think of things to keep me up

Oh how I dread to let me sleep

So scared of the me I'll meet

I'll take your pills I'll go to sleep

The rest you give Is not so great

But the dreams off REM I just cant take

Another day about to break 

Another mask I'm about to make

And the at night I'll again just break.

Scorpion

[kato]

@SCORPION 

Thank you for sharing this,

it is painful, i understand, but you have written it really nicely, i hope that finding something here to connect with can help you with your dreams, i am commenting about your dreams post, i have a med that one of it's side effects is vivid dreams, and they are most unpleasant, i am lucky tho, i do not remember them very well, i hope that with time, you can get something to help you not have those dreams that you have...... it will take time, and i hope you find comfort here when you cannot sleep.

[Loopy]

kato, congratulations, you have excelled with you duties.

"Without first step, there is no challenge.
Without direction, there can be no goal.
Without conviction, no  dedication.
Without learning, no understanding
Success comes to those
who challenge destiny,
determine their goals,
dedicate their efforts, and
educate themselves.

loopy.

[kato]

@Loopy 

Thank you, i wouldn't have come so far, without the support of all the members here

but my journey has only begun and i still have far to go, but i am getting there.

Thank you

[PeppiPatty]

dear Kato,

I must write, I always enjoy reading your journey...
remorse is a wonderful thing to have. many people don't have it.......
Really good. It feels you are beginning to see value in yourself, with catching up with old friends,,

I am going to ask if no one writes of the last hobbit film because I haven't seen it yet okay ? thanks :0) but I do know what happens so if you do write about it, please keep it secret from me okay ? Lol lol