ever wonder why

[wordman]

@tonys Hello Tonys. Thank you for your kind words. I agree there a lot of people on this forum who want to express themselves and are perhaps afraid to not do do so for fear of being judged. I say to all out there express yourselves as i know you all have worthy things to say and write which i eagerly await to read and listen. 

Kind Regards 

Wordman 

[wordman]

@BobP @tonys @maddison @hanami @Jake63 Hello to you all. You are making my experience on this forum a truly and joyous experience. I congratulate you all for opening up and speaking to me through your heart. Your mind is now open let it flow, let it prosper, let it flourish. Look forward to reading more posts which I am finding exhilarating and most helpful to myself. Be true to yourselves and you will find the most wonderful things will occur and happen to you within your lives. Keep going what you are doing. Write prophesy, write poetry, write stories, write philosophy, write anything as long as you can become a complete and whole person from it all. 

Kind Regards

Wordman

[maddison]

Thankyou for your lovely letter @tonys you know I made a funny squeaking sound when I see a new letter from you.

Speaking of inside out flano (yes I have done that) I think I might be on day 4 of wearing the same long faded black dress. I think there is toothpaste on it. Finding new outfits is difficult & this dress is comfortable.

I am going for another walk soon. At the end of my street I have a captivating view of the beach. I might take photo for you. The last few days have finally been sunny in Melbourne. Trying to make the most of the weather b4 I'm stuck inside again.

Figure skating is beautiful & captivating to watch isn't it?

I didn't say I talk too much - I said lots😊 Anyway, I love your reply that you could listen to me (read me) all day long...I feel the same.

I wrote your poem out by hand. I don't want to change it. 

I would like to know what special gifts you find for your book keeper & backpackers - or maybe it is private. I guess you are planning on going back to the farm very soon? I hope you will still be able to write to me?

Now, I have to organise myself for a walk. Sunscreen because I can't leave house without it. Sunglasses. Phone to take a picture for you. Earbuds so I can walk calming without all the noise getting in the way.... Ummm, shoes (with no spiders hopefully) socks - by the time I have done that - I will probably be hungry, so then I will need to quickly eat. And then I need to hydrate for my walk. Then I will be ready - look for my phone, because I will have lost it by then - & as easily as that, I will be out the door.

Sending you silky goodness & an extra hug for your poem xx

[maddison]

Picture incoming @tonys ⬇️

  

My walk was lovely. I think my forehead might have sunburnt! Next time definately wear a hat. Zero pressure to reply😊 You do you, my friend. I only wanted to share this special view with you xx 

@wordman @BobP @Sophia1 

thankyou for my letter @Sophia1  xx I'm so happy you are feeling a little lighter. I will certainly reply properly soon💜

[maddison]

Hi @wordman 

I always enjoy your insights & abundance of positivity. It helps me, maybe more than you know.

It is difficult to write, or express ourselves in any way, without the looming fear of judgement shadowing each word.

I love your encouragement. I feel like you are speaking your truth. I would like one day, to simply be free to be me. I think we all want that. I certainly see glimpses & I'm so appreciative of those magical moments. They build on one another.

I am 45 years old now. I was only diagnosed with autism/ADHD this year. As soon as I heard the diagnosis, I instantly knew it was right. 

I look back over my entire childhood, teen, young adult & I see a girl who never quite fit in or understood. I didn't want to be seen as 'weird' - I did everything I could to appear like I was as worthy of acceptance as everyone I saw around me. Inside, I knew I was entirely different. I hid it, best I could. I used my high intelligence to create an acceptable identity - & I became a master at it.

It's no wonder I made so many silly choices - they were based on a person I thought I was meant to be!

Really, I would like to know me. I think I have already unveiled one... or..two truths. There is much to go & much more hidden - so far I think I like who I see.

But, yes - the fear of judgement is still present.

And in moments I need to retreat, back into my disguise, where it is safe. Yet, it is not - is it?

That is what your comments mean to me.

💜💚🌺

[tonys]

 @BobP Hello BobP,     Mate ,    i hope you are right about art.  In one form or another ,  i'd be lost without it.

Thanks for your kind words,  Yes my mind does meander a bit.  Helps the stream around the hills,     I was born with a brain damage,  and autism.    Bed fellows ,   .... but estranged.    

There are hints in your letters of a   refined education,   a  reader,  an academic.

 Dinner at your table.   ...      I think when we lift the silver steam lid a complex cuisine awaits.

I grew up hungry,   so i don't have to recognise it .   I'll just hook in anyway.     

I was basically expelled from kindergarten.        Second hand strings and a pitted harmonica is the best i can do.    Strangely,   i did observe that my rusty peach tin  harvested more coins than the new Akubra and and Gibson around the corner,   and he sounds way better than me.

Its all about the rusty tin,...    i think.     Same words,...    Different illusions.

Beautiful world...      we all speak a variety of dialects,    but there is elbow room at this table for all.      So slide in next to me ,   that you grace our table, is an honour. 

Your friend     tonys ,  moonbase one.     p  s.    May not be able to write to you for a little bit.   Im a little behind  on replies 

[tonys]

@maddison    I knew i .... i knew it   .....    i knew ..  it   !    You just had to be a Melbourne lass. 

I know those streets,     perhaps a little to well.

Thumbed a lift on the highway north and pined for the place ever since.  Thankyou so much for your beautiful words and the  , view of the blue. 

 My poem on your hand..   mate ,  thats ,   well ...

for once,    i'm stuck for words.        Finding dresses,   its ok.    Black goes with anything mate...

Yea ,   right..     like i would have a clue.      All i know about fashion is,  i don't feel right unless i'm in something that some one else has lived in before.    I'm around 6 foot five inches, and my draught horse finds hard work abhorrent,  so I'm a little on the large size,   so finding something thats,    ' pre stretched,      prized items,        least thats the theory any way.   Talk to much ...    Tomatoes ....   Tomaaaaaatoes.    I'm just so happy that you sound so good.

Walking on  sunshine ,  ocean breeze.  .....   Its the most shiny ive seen you...    Proud of you mate..

I found a lead light lamps and some and some concert tickets for the book keeper,   and the back packers,  some good quality fold up bikes and and 3 bottles of Drambuie,  ... ...  which i just know they will share with me....   opps.     They all get some cash besides,  .. because they never ever abuse my trust.    Trust ,....    a rare commodity .   

Will be back on moonbase one soon but i"ll try rigging my antenna up a gum tree.    I'll find a way.

 Thing i like about your dress is not that its black.   Its that its faded.      It says something very powerful about both of us.   Tonys   moon base one.

[maddison]

It's because I'm chill isn't it - that's why you thought I was from Melbourne? Where are you? I think you are in QLD - I actually have no idea. You have Qld vibe I think? If so, you are an hour behind me. I'm usually in bed sleep - up late, I thought it was my turn to tuck you in tonight🌙

Night.

Sweet dreams @tonys 

[wordman]

@maddison @tonys @BobP @hanami @Jake63 Hello to you all. Thank you for maintaining communication via this forum. I receive you posts with joy. Please excuse my somewhat sloppy navigation of this forum. My computer skills are not the greatest. I am learning how to navigate the forum as each day passes. I hope this post finds you all well and brimming with positivity. I am enjoying your stories. I hope all your stories are an antidote for you all. I am completely in awe of you all as you share your stories and pictures. Your healing is my healing. Your belief in yourselves is my belief in myself. You all inspire me and I know you all have a lot to offer this world. Please do not mute your thoughts. Open up and speak to me as I am definitely listening. 

Kind Regards 

Wordman

[hanami]

Hi there 

@wordman 

It's so great to have you as part of the community! I love the positivity and kindness that you bring. I also love reading the wonderful way you express yourself!

Warmest wishes

hanami