At War With Yourself

[BlueBay]

Standing in the edge 

I often wonder why 

the breeze is blowing my hair 

and wiping the tiny tears 

the sun shines on me 

trying to make me feel 

but then all I want 

is it all to stand still

the view from right up here 

the mountains I can see 

for all the little butterflies 

flying right past me 

I often sit and ponder 

what is this all about 

for there is no winner 

but lots of little doubt 

I see across a rainbow 

the sweet bright colours above 

I sit and ponder again 

what's life all about 

[Owlunar]

Hi @BlueBay 

I am having some trouble and losing my messages here but that is a powerful poem  - the circumstances are  certainly different but you could have been writing about my mother  - it really struck home 

I had a vision of frozen flowers  - I would have loved my .mother if she let me 

Our mothers are the losers here  - they never knew us 

You are a strong and courageous woman BlueBay  - believe us when we tell you  - we can see it 

That's great writing  - keep it up 

Dec

[BlueBay]

Thsnks for your support @Owlunar ❤️❤️

[Former-Member]

If the lights go out

i won't survive

never again

will I see

the despair

in others eyes

when I wake

never again

will I search

for reasons

to keep alive

when I wake

never again

will I walk

in darkness 

to search light

when I wake

if the lights go out 

i won't survive

[Snowie]

@Former-Member 💜💜

Beautiful words 

[Silenus]

In Sanity

The lived experience of being insane

In a sane world
Is indistinguishable from being sane
In an insane world.

22nd July, 2020.

[Define_normal]

Just thought I would share a writing piece I did recently.

My head demons

My head demons attack me everyday
But nobody sees the way that they behave
Everyday they do the same things
Slowly tearing me down little by little
At first I had strength
I could ignore their existence
But life is cruel
Beating me to the ground repeatedly
My strength is all but gone now
But nobody knows it

My demons do not hurt me physically
Nope they are more skilled then that
They got into my head where they can say what they like
They got into my head where they can play with my thoughts
They got into my head where they can mess with my emotions
Everyday I hear them
Why did you do that
Why did you dress like that
That person just looked at you bet they don't like you
Why did you talk to that person bet you annoyed them
You're out alone, what were you thinking don't forget to check behind you, you never know who might be there.
Everyday they use thoughts and memories against me
Home alone.. remember that time you were attacked at home
Your partner is late... he's probably hurt
Dropping your son off to school.... don't forget to kiss and cuddle him it might be the last time
Everyday I struggle to control my emotions
Happy your partner is home... let's be irritable for no reason
Feeling content... how about we get angry over something small
Focused on something important that needs to be done... let's have a complete meltdown over a small detail
Everyday my mind goes through this torture
Everyday the demons in my head try to bring me down
I know they want me to give in
I know my strength is all but gone
But I know I have a reason to keep going
It may only be one
And for some, one is not enough
But this one reason is all I need
I just hope i harbour enough strength to keep myself standing.

[Former-Member]

picture perfect

perfect life

life forgotten

forgotten dreams

dreams lost

lost mind

mind me

me dead

dead

[Former-Member]

Hi @Former-Member ,
Such powerful words in poetry and I love how poetry and all arts allow for space to reflect feelings and thoughts. Just wanted to reach out and let you know we appreciate you being around and safe. Please don't hesitated to reach out to the crisis services such as Suicide Call Back service 1300 659 467 or Lifeline on 13 11 14 if you need to.
That being said, thankyou for sharing your feelings
Radius

[Former-Member]

tick
ticking away

tick tock

all prepared

tick tock 

where do I go

tick tock

hide and lay low

tick tock

forever leave

tick tock

never forgive

tock