The magic of tidying

[HenryX]

Hello @Dimity and @Last-Lament 

Dimity, your synopsis of the tidying quest is nicely worded and seems to be how it is for me.

Today, I went to Geraldton, which is a day's trip, with a few extra errands done as well. Caught up with a very good friend to wish her a happy birthday. Always pleasant and uplifting.

Also received the first dose of the Pfizer vaccine at Geraldton today. The injection was fine. The nurse couldn't even find the spot to put the little plaster on, afterward. Hadn't had my morning blood meal, so no sign of blood.😊 That was at about 2.00pm and now at nearly 11.00pm, there is a sensation like a corked muscle, not severe, but noticeable.

Mood shifts up and down. Have to catch myself if/when I go into "negative rumination mode", and consciously replace those thoughts with positive statements that I know to be true.

Trips to Geraldton are sufficiently taxing to remind me of the necessity of improving my physical condition and capacity. I am aware that it is imperative for me to get puncture fixed on the bicycle. Such a relatively simple thing, yet mental and, to some degree, physical barriers to sorting it out.

It was good to get out into sunny weather. I actually felt enthusiastic about the idea of getting into light working gear and outside, to tackle some of the tasks that need attention. That was in my head today, let's see how far that enthusiasm reaches tomorrow morning. Working on it !!

Thanks to you both for keeping me included in the thread.

With Best Wishes

@HenryX 

[Dimity]

I'm glad you enjoyed your trip to Geraldton @HenryX and hope you made the most of the pleasant weather. Do you need to buy any parts to fix the puncture? It's easy to let things slide as I know too well. I've started trying to back up an old laptop to an external hard drive after procrastinating about it for a long time. I have a lot of data from a publishing project that needs attention and a lot of further work. I need to try to get a very old printer/scanner/copier working again as well. It's a family project that I haven't worked on for a couple of years. I need to migrate it all onto newer equipment. 

I've been trying to walk every day or two, and have noticed a new pair of magpies. The previous female struggled with a crippled leg for 2-3 years then we had none for a while. I'll be glad to have them. 

[HenryX]

Hello @Dimity 

Thank you for your note yesterday regarding my Geraldton trip, bike tyre repair, and your activity in transferring/ backing up data from old laptop, publishing project, printer repair, walking and enjoyment of the magpies.

I went to Geraldton again yesterday, for medical matters that could not be combined with the trip on Monday. The taxing part of Geraldton trips is not so much the drive, which I usually enjoy, but the exercise in getting into, around and out of shops and other locations, such as those required for medical attention. In some ways I am spoilt, living in my town, because, when going by car, I can normally park right at the front of any business or building to which I need to go. Really, that is the reason that I need to get the bike functional, since everything in town is within easy riding distance from where I live, and therefore will give me what ever exercise that I can get from the bike, and on a regular basis.

Yesterday's trip was for an injection that I hope will improve my activity and emotional capacity to move things along.

You mentioned that you are working to backup the data on an old laptop. Two applications that I have found particularly useful are the free versions of:

“Macrium Software Reflect Free

<https://www.macrium.com/reflectfree>

“EaseUS Partition Master Free Edition – Free for Home Users”

available at <https://www.easeus.com/download/epmf-download.html> and

The Macrium software offers a complete cloning function, or alternatively, backup of any part of a hard drive. The cloning function provides the facility for a complete clone of a hard drive with all of its operating system (OS), to another hard drive. Having used it for that purpose, I can recommend the Macrium software.

The EaseUs software offers a very useful partition manager, that I have also used fairly regularly, and which allows you to partition a hard drive, for separation of material etc.

Needless to say, the usual appropriate safety cautions apply, with regard to backing up and use of any software. However I have found both of these software applications to be very useful and easy to use, with the assistance of their guides. They both have relatively intuitive user interfaces. And, they also incorporate, what I would regard as, adequate warnings at various stages of each process.

I do hope that they may be useful for you.

With Best Wishes

@HenryX 

[Last-Lament]

It's been a while since I've been around here @Dimity @HenryX .

I also sincerely appreciate those who drop by and who offer their supports, the affirmation of recieving such supports is heartwarming. I hope I've expressed that adequately. 

On the matter of backing up files, it's so important to find something easy to work with, that you'll remember how to use, and all the other associated stuff! I use FreeFileSync for backing up files, but I had someone set it up for me due to reasons I choose not to disclose here. 

My inroads into a less cluttered and more relaxing lifestyle are having an effect for me. There's a sense of lightness spreading out from my physical self instead of a feeling of external pressure crushing into my space. There's been quite a level of catharthism since letting go of so many attachments. In cleaning the physical, my mental, emotional and spiritual senses have been cleansed too. 

I feel like there might be space to let some new experiences in. It is these feelings that cause me to continue, moment by moment, step by step, article by article, to pare down the trappings of what once was. Many of the items collected and held onto were gathered in an attempt to provide protection for me as I grappled with all of the issues of abuse and needing to belong, and being self sufficient. 

Now, when I see something that shouldn't be where it is, I put it in a box in the garage if it needs further assessing, or in what ever relevant box it needs to go in if I already recognise where it needs to go. If something needs mending, it either gets mended right there and then, depending on the situation, or it gets put where it will be attended to in the very near future.

Keeping present within my surrounds, mindful of the task I'm doing and the area I'm physically in, helps with maintaining my goal of decluttering.

It's possible to clean and tidy without a thought to the objects one is picking up, wiping, putting down again, yet if I maintain my attention, my presence within the task, it is so much easier to make inroads without expending too much effort. It also give me a really nice sense of satisfaction too. 

Perhaps by us sharing our experiences here, someone else might find their own answers, sometimes a shared thought or idea, opens up a myriad of other untapped potentials. 

Best wishes to all who pass by. 

[HenryX]

Hello @Last-Lament and @Dimity

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{Long Post ~1050 words}

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@Last-Lament I enjoyed reading your comment on reducing “baggage” and the effect that being mindful of what you retain and why, has had for you. The fact that you find the less cluttered space leading to a more relaxed lifestyle, is both assuring and inspirational. Your comments about having so much around coincides with the way that I also feel at the moment.

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For me, having access to what I need, when I need it, is one of my motivators. Also, as you have alluded to, there is only so much that an individual can reasonably expect to make use of, during any given period of time, be that a day, a week, a year or a decade. So much material collected in anticipation of plans and projects that are no longer achievable or useful. And the time-span for making use of those materials is getting shorter and shorter. So I not only have to cull the physical material load, but also the mentally and physically achievable project load. All of which means sorting and letting go of materials and mentally retained plans and objectives. The reward will be that I can take on a realistic and achievable project and have the sense of accomplishment that comes from its completion. Also to enjoy a more relaxed lifestyle.

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I spend a lot of time, not very successfully, trying to manage “resources” instead of using them. Much of what I have at the present time has been acquired in the last 20 odd years. I am becoming more and more aware that what I might have considered being able to accomplish, even as recently as 10 years ago, is very different from what I can reasonably expect to accomplish and achieve now. And that is what I also have to accommodate as well.

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There are a lot of reasons for acquiring objects. Sometimes, they are for immediate use, other times for inclusion in future plans. I have recently become aware that much of what I have collected is a form of protection or even defence. A way of distancing myself from other people and to some extent, them from me. This is part of the reason that I decided to again seek the assistance of a counsellor about 3 months ago. I was aware that there were issues that I needed to view from other, new, different perspectives. I realised that the distancing was continuing and developing as a way of life that I no longer wanted to retain. Not, necessarily, that I had consciously chosen that style of life, but it was a style that I have developed, in part, as a form of self protection and self defence. Also, I was concerned that that way of life was turning into a dark rabbit hole.

"

I can identify, very closely, with your comment,

“Many of the items, collected and held onto, were gathered in an attempt to provide protection for me, as I grappled with all of the issues of abuse and needing to belong, and (yet, also endeavouring to maintain the sense of) being self sufficient.

The abuse may have come in different forms for each of us, but was still abuse, all the same. There are many different degrees, types and forms of abuse. For people who have experienced abuse in its various forms, the results, expressions and products, I believe, often look very similar. Like so many others, I thought my own experiences were normal, “just like every one else”. But my experience was not like that which, I hope and now believe, that most other children and teenagers experienced during those years. It was only when I described my experiences, and the surprise, expressed by the counsellor, was the first response, that I became aware of inconsistencies and differences between my own experience and that of the majority of other children and teenagers. I was presented with very different scenarios, through which I realised those differences and variations. Isolation, during those formative years, meant that it was then an subsequently, difficult to form and visualise comparisons. Abuse also means retained and continuing effects of that trauma load, that we express in various ways throughout our lives, some of which can be learned practices of self defence and self protection, and even by separation through dissociation. Unfortunately, I have come to realise, that many of the ways in which I have learned to react and respond, can be and have been maladaptive and counterproductive in other contexts. While I have, maybe intuitively at times, endeavoured to empathise with and support others in dealing with the effects of abuse, it is only at this late stage, that I am really becoming aware of the impact that abuse has had on, and within my own life. Indeed, what I am presently writing in these comments is really, a relatively new exercise and experience for me.

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The problem needs to be addressed before a solution can be realised. And the problem isn't always what appears to be most obvious.

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I want to be able to invite people to my home, enjoy the company of others in my space as much as I am learning to enjoy theirs, as I hope that they enjoy mine, in their spaces. I could see, in my life, the older patterns becoming more and more evident and self reinforcing, patterns of learned behaviours, that are very different from the way that I wish to live.

"

I believe that my activity, with other members, on this forum site, the assistance of a counsellor, resolving the problems and stressors of a cyclone, the processing of feelings following the death of my mother and my engagement with other people in the community in which I live, have all been significant contributors to my self awareness and desire for change. A manifestation of which is my present desire to remove, reduce and rationalise.

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Another area of development for me relates to what you wrote,

“Keeping present within my surrounds, mindful of the task I'm doing and the area I'm physically in, helps with maintaining my goal of decluttering.”

"

Thank You to Both of You

and other members of the forum

With My Best Wishes

@HenryX 

[Dimity]

Hello @HenryX @Last-Lament (and all passing by)

Thanks for your suggestions re computer backups. I might graduate to a software solution once I'm more confident.

Your thoughts and experiences resonate with me re acquiring things in the context of managing relationships and what was a protective shell and refuge ultimately becoming a series of barriers. And nurturing activities and projects that are no longer useful or achievable. It's challenging and at times confronting. I'm still in the early stages and feeling anxiety both in trying and in not-trying but have set myself a daily minimum that's a fraction of what I could/should do. Brain fog and disengagement have been a battle for too long, whether MH or physical. The lightness after decluttering will be very welcome but first I have to push through the sense of loss. I hope I'll be able to rebuild relationships during and after the process, because at the moment I'm feeling very isolated.

[Dimity]

Hello @HenryX @Last-Lament . My days have been slow and quiet. I weeded the front garden and the poppies and irises were lovely but a neighbour mowed them down last weekend.

I've been sorting and filing invoices and receipts. I'll buy a shredder to finish the job.

I've also been tackling my technophobia and have started setting up the laptop I bought nearly a year ago. There were a few hiccups like selecting a UK keyboard and trying to connect to WiFi but it's working now. Transferring my data, setting up an antivirus package and printing hard copy of key files will come next. And trying to activate my vaccination passport. 

My cookbooks remind me re meal planning @HenryX . It would be nice if we could compare and discuss strategies. I might aim for more soups and salads. Homemade pasta is something else I'd like to try. 

I have a lot of old audio cassettes. I'm not sure whether they're still playable so I guess that'll be an easy decluttering decision. But a sentimental one. I have a lot of vinyl LPs too, but need a new sound system - another decision. 

Onwards and upwards.

[HenryX]

Hello @Dimity and @Last-Lament

and others visiting this thread.

@DimityYou have, in your last two posts, summarised in words, very succinctly, what I think are the issues and aspirations of us three, and very likely others who may be interested in the content of this thread. Thank you.

In putting these thoughts and feelings into words, we are, I believe, supporting each other, clarrifying our goals and certainly feeling very much less lonely in the process of moving toward what we wish to achieve. When you mention tapes and LP's, my heart drops for a moment with the same feelings that I imagine you are experiencing. And there is so much more than those.

While we each have our individual goals, it seems to me that what we have in common is the process. Exchanging ideas, even at times when we may think that we have not made much progress, is as reassuring to each other as when we can shout about achievements and targets reached. Sometimes, possibly even more so. 

We don't want to slow each other down, but there is a lot to the experience that we are sharing.

Thank you both. I know that I have said it before, but I hope that the rest of the words that I use convey the sincerity with which I express my appreciation.

With My Most Sincere Best Wishes

@HenryX 

[Dimity]

Thankyou @HenryX I really appreciate your encouragement and support. I hope our friend @Historylover will also be able to join us from time to time.

I find my old "ghetto blaster " cassette player no longer works except for radio so I guess the time has come to discard my cassettes. 90% of them were my late father's classical off-air recordings. It will be a wrench, but another step in the decluttering process. He'd meticulously catalogued and cross-indexed them in a card file, which I still have somewhere in his handmade wooden box. I'm grateful to have had them.

It's cold tonight, with rain forecast. I hope all reading have a good day tomorrow leading into a good weekend. 

[Dimity]

So I've tossed out about 60 tapes and there are more to go. I have a bag of clothes and a bag of books ready for the opshop. I've bought a paper shredder (not yet delivered). 

I got bogged down by paper files and need to get back to 3 tables' full of them. Plus I need to see if my obsolete printer still works, with its very expensive cartridges. 

I downloaded a mood/activity tracker to see if it helps. I lost the plot for a few days when neighbours cut down/pulled out more of the garden. The melaleuca is a great loss, so too the little orange correa I'd planted. 

I can see there's been other decluttering threads. I'd like to read them but I have trouble finding and getting back to the search box. 

Tomorrow lockdown will have eased. I'm not sure how much retail will reopen... opshops might be in the next stage.