Let's do Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT)

[Phoenix_Rising]

@Former-Member that's a really good article on radical acceptance.

@Sans911 giggle - yes the PLAN is that the final mindfulness post will appear soon. It will appear when it appears...and that's ok. 

Menopause does sound like a tricky thing to radically accept. 

I definitely do agree with MOST of what Linehan says about radical acceptance. I just think she takes it a step too far when she tries to argue that there is no right and wrong, or no "should." 

[Sans911]

@Phoenix_Rising - I see you point about being right or wrong. I think the reason Marsha Linehan does that is because right, wrong and should are judgements which is a lot of the premises behind DBT. Judgements are negatively biased, and prevent us from growth, stability and healthy self work as well as impairing communication & interpersonal relationships.

[Sans911]

Work=worth @Phoenix_Rising

[outlander]

thank you @Former-Member@Sans911@Phoenix_Rising that is very helpful. i get it now. 

@Sans911not bad for an early morning post! and love your RA of menopause. and thank you for explaining ACCEPTS

@Phoenix_Risinglooking forward to the next installment but whenever your ready

@Former-Memberthank you for sharing the link, that was helpful too 

[Catcakes]

Hi @Former-Member 👋🏼

[Former-Member]

Hey there @Catcakes and everyone else here - thanks for the tag. 

Purchased the books today (on a great sale), should be with me in about 10 days. 

I will continue to avidly read to try to catch up and hopefully join you all on this journey. 

[Adge]

@Phoenix_RisingI get the point about No "Should" - my psychologist is big on No "Shoulding", No "Butting", & No "Musting"...

I think that's because those words (or expectations) put unnecessary negative pressure on ourselves.

I think that saying that there is no right or wrong (at all) is taking it too far though.

The law & road rules certainly don't see it that way - try breaking a law or rule to find out....

No I'm not recommending breaking the law

Adge

[Former-Member]

@Phoenix_Rising
Am I being a but naughty by suggesting we could we practice radical acceptance if we don't agree with the opinion of Ms Linehan on the question of good and bad ????

[Adge]

Adge

[Phoenix_Rising]

Hi @Former-Member it is SUPER nice to see you here on the DBT adventure. Don't stress too much about trying to catch up - it's not exactly a fast-paced adventure.  Have you done any DBT previously, SunShower?

I actually wrote some more of the next installment yesterday, so it is in progress. Of course, that still doesn't necessarily mean I will finish it before the year 2020, but hey, we can always hope. 

@Adge why the sad face? I definitely agree with your psychologist regarding "should" and "must" in a lot of ways. For example, I agree that it is super unhelpful to say things like "I should be able to get the next bit of the DBT adventure written." However, on the other hand, I think it is perfectly fine to say things like "parents should provide lots of love and care to their children." I agree with what you said in one of your posts about how if we totally get rid of right/wrong, should, shouldn't etc., we land in the realm of relativism, which is not a philosophy I subscribe to. 

@Former-Member giggle, yes I think it is perfectly fine to radically accept Linehan's opinion.  I agree with MOST of her argument, but not ALL of it...but her opinion is her opinion and that's ok.  I would definitely struggle in a face-to-face DBT group if Linehan's argument was presented as a fact rather than an opinion based on a particular philosophy. I wonder if group leaders are able to accept when clients disagree with the philosophy, or whether such clients are labelled "treatement resistent" or some such thing. Maybe some Forumites who have actually attended a DBT group might have something to say about this???